There is a wall between me and forever.
Frigid
Blocks of silence encapsulate what I thought I could be,
Leaving me sweating in this heat.
The chill echoes throughout my bones,
I'm too tired to chip at the frost.
Warmed by self annihilation,
Self medicated, to keep my body temperature above death.
Self worth, value slips under
The waves of internal youth.
I dream of sun-kissed light,
Drawing my stomach into itself.
I've got a bootlegged life,
Long overdue.
A noose around my ring finger
Diamonds around my neck
Visible to none,
Seen by all.
Quiet, the loudest concert I've ever been to
Keep it up, you're being recorded
Your epitaph a video,
Looped on replay
For eternity
An exhibition
A dedication
For the Ice Age.

I've never been good at
Being touched.

Though the fingers
Of endless suitors
Have traced incomparable
Lines of affection,
They all stroke
The same wounds.

New hands feel like
Recycled lullabies,
Humming promises
Of a new melody,
Singing a remedy for
My impassivity.

Whether words fall
Passionate or
Fearful,
Endearment lines my lips
With an expiration
Long enough to convince me,
But short enough to leave me.

Reminding me:
The disintegration of
Indifference
Remains
My prerequisite
For destruction.

So before you
Touch me with
Promises of a new
Orchestration,
I'm already marking the
Days until you leave.

Because my skin
Is tired of
Intruders hidden
Behind momentary
Infatuation.

So keep your hands to yourself.