i'm pathetic.
really pathetic

i'm alone
really alone

i'm dead
really dead.

i'm no longer a human
i'm really a shell.

What is this
What is that
What is anything
Why am I here
Why are you here
Why is anything, *anything

i want so badly to
reach out to you
to touch you
to hold you
to kiss you
to cry into you
to confide into you
to yell at you
to hate you
to wish you dead
to wish you back
to wish for you at all

but most of all
i want you to wish for me
to acknowledge me
to know more than just my name, or my appearance
because i know they're not much

i just want them to mean something to you.
so you can mean something to me

you just
dont seem
to understand
how i
feel anymore

do you ever wonder
what your life now would be like
through the eyes of the person
you once were?

I've become empty enough to the point where i can't form words
or actions
to describe it.

I've officially gone beyond definition.

i'm not really good at talking


and neither are you

but *******


can i have your number

i know i'm a lot to handle


                                                                       please dont forget you love me

do you know where the wild things go?

they hide inside

playing with fire

ensuring that every mistake they make

        leaves

                      a

                  ­            mark.

those things that you just can't wait for,
those things that you lay in bed and think about all night
those things you dream about at night, and day dream about during the day
those things you exaggerate in your head

those things,

they always end up the opposite of what you expected them to be

and in the end,
just end up hurting you.

everything is suddenly clear now

sorry i misinterpreted your actions

tick
      tick
            tick
                   tick
                          tick

                                  

                                            boom


                     that's
                 how
             the
       ending
   goes

hey you,


                                                  i miss seeing your face everyday

i still see bits of you in every person i meet

all i want to do is be able to write a good poem

but i can't find the words to piece together

to form a flow of words

that actually goes well together

you saved me in my darkest hour


i love you

everyone is there for you



                                                                    expect when you really need them.

my future is laid out before me

i just dont understand how to grab it.

did you really think


                                                                  i cared that much about you?

you said

                       all good things take time

                                                                      and everything would work out



                                                                                              you said

                                                  you would never leave


                 and we would work it all out

you said

                              i was strong enough to go on

                                                                                     and i could do it alone

you lied.

thoughts: gone
mind: blank
feet: pain
hands: shaking

you: here