It’s a box full of green dots destroying what was once called my self esteem
You wanted me when the lights were out
And guidance was my enlightened words now not found
I picked you up
And shoved myself instead of you
I picked you up
And tired as I be; after I think and feel and believe and disregard all at once
I laid exactly at that railroad of crushing trains
Striking so furiously my heart
And each time that train gets closer
My insecurities become like the forsaken minorities
Of the land waiting to avenge their vanquished souls
Wanting revenge on the land lord
And the land lord is lured into lowering lives of dislexyical comments like leaves leaving a tree not because they have to but because they have the power to self-destruct
It’s not us that we fail to continue
Its our ability not too
Our will to stop
Our moments of clarity
In which nothing is clear
And clear is the day you come up to me and explain the complexity that is your affect and the regret that is my whole existence
And clear is the day in which I find the answers to life wrapped in papers fallen on grounds of religious beliefs with my name on top
A note for majd
A majd for all the notes you keep inside in the ample spaces between your teeth and total loss of diction
Like dictating decimations you strike words of explosions
Like nuclear weapons it’s not the fall of reason that kills me
It’s reason that eases my falling
And I fall into senseless diversions
Diverging through divisions of disintegrating poems
Determining what we don’t know
And knowing what we cannot determine
All words are not words but simple signs
Of my breakdown
And all breakdowns are not breakdowns but mere stimulation of the senses; a kick start …