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Jul 2017 · 247
Wikipedia can be fun
gravelbar Jul 2017
Oud
Rose of Taif
Incense
Musk
Sandalwood
and
rare spices

1. Mayil Karuppu (Black and yellow)

2. Kagam/sengaruppu (Black and red)

3. Sevalai (Red)

4. Karum Keeri/Senkeeri (black/red dotted)

5. Sambal Boothi (Grey)

6. Kokku Vellai (White)

7. Noolan (white and black)

8. Pondram (Golden brown)

Automotive Safety Integrity Level is a risk classification scheme defined by the ISO 26262 - Functional Safety for Road Vehicles standard. This is an adaptation of the Safety Integrity Level used in IEC 61508 for the automotive industry.
gravelbar Jul 2017
Males of Dynastes bear two long horns, one on the head, and the other on the pronotum, forming a "plier"; the pronotal horn has reddish setae on its underside. This pronotal horn is absent in females.[3] Some species have an iridescent colouration to their elytra.[4] Certain species of the genus Dynastes also have the ability to change colour.[5] Specific species have been noted to occur with either black or yellowish to khaki green elytra.[5] This variation in colour is due to a spongy layer below the transparent cuticle;[5] this spongy layer is a network of filamentous strands made up of three-dimensional photonic crystals lying parallel to the cuticle surface.[6] When the cuticle is filled with gas this layer can show through, presenting the yellow to khaki green colour, but when filled with fluid the cuticle appears black.[5] This is due to the change in refraction index allowing us to see the difference in colours.[6] This system is known as a hygrochromic effect.[4] Female beetles can change colour but not as completely as males, which is not yet explained as the mechanisms for the colour change is still not completely understood.[5] What is known is that changes in humidity affect the levels of moisture in the cuticle which leads to a change in colour in most cases.[5] Since the change is due to humidity it is a reversible process, however, it has been observed that after multiple colour changes or high stress the beetles will maintain some dark spots on their cuticle.[4] Some hypotheses for why this colour change occurs at all are the ability to blend with surroundings depending on the time of day (black for nighttime and yellow for daytime) to best avoid their main predator, the tropical screech owl (Megascops choliba).[5] Another theory has to do with thermoregulation in the sense that a black beetle heats up faster than yellow and then once they have warmed up theoretically there will be less moisture in the cuticle which leads to changing to a colour which does not heat as quickly so they won't overheat.[5]
Jul 2017 · 390
Words
gravelbar Jul 2017
Hello oldnumber7 [1702] (signout)
messages  posts  groups settings dashboard
Topic: [02:15] birdy_bird: ****** ***** | bottleYour cam:   Unmute   Push2Talk  Configure   StopLeave
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[01:48] fearitferret: I got a minte or two
[01:52] fearitferret: I'm named after a flower
[01:52] fearitferret: gotta impress better than that  
[01:52] oldnumber7: haha
[01:52] oldnumber7: ill try
[01:52] oldnumber7: imma press them in a book
[01:53] fearitferret: Patrick
[01:53] fearitferret: can I ask you a serious question
[01:53] oldnumber7: yes my love
[01:53] fearitferret: break my heart, but do you ever see an actual future for us?
[01:53] oldnumber7: yes
[01:53] oldnumber7: if we can stay alive long enough
[01:53] oldnumber7: yes
[01:54] oldnumber7: is that okay?
[01:54] fearitferret: like, we get to live and die together?
[01:54] oldnumber7: you're my lady im your man?
[01:54] oldnumber7: yeah
[01:54] oldnumber7: if we can do it
[01:54] oldnumber7: inshallah
[01:54] fearitferret: die being decades ahead
[01:54] fearitferret: I'll **** YOU if you awnt to die of anything but old age
[01:54] oldnumber7: hahah
[01:55] fearitferret: I prmise you, I think you'd love it out here, so close to the beach and I want to play with you in the ocean all the time
[01:56] fearitferret: but this means I can work towards moving closer to you if I have to
[01:56] oldnumber7: i want to come to you
[01:56] oldnumber7: get away from here
[01:56] oldnumber7: check ur fb
[01:56] fearitferret: I wish I could make you come here right now, bit **** is super complicated
[01:56] oldnumber7: i know
[01:56] oldnumber7: we have time
[01:57] fearitferret: ummm really?
[01:58] fearitferret: God am I really getting teary eyed over the fact you wanted to be in a FB official relationip with me
[01:58] oldnumber7: i ****** love you
[01:58] oldnumber7: i was blind but now i see
[01:58] fearitferret: RELATIONSHIP
[01:58] oldnumber7: yep
[01:58] oldnumber7: 3.2.1. go
[01:59] fearitferret: you  better be ******* serious about this
[01:59] oldnumber7: i am
[01:59] oldnumber7: im not ****** around
[01:59] fearitferret: I love you to absolute death
[01:59] oldnumber7: same
[01:59] fearitferret: and it
[01:59] oldnumber7: feels good
[01:59] oldnumber7: right
[01:59] oldnumber7: etc
[01:59] fearitferret: it'll take a lot of work to make it
[01:59] oldnumber7: we can do it
[01:59] oldnumber7: work is good
[01:59] oldnumber7: i have a lot of work to do
[02:00] oldnumber7: god willing i am able to accomplish a lot here in the next couple months
[02:00] oldnumber7: hey you
[02:00] fearitferret: You know it'll be 100 times easier for you to move here first, then maybe we move back if that is what you want?
[02:00] oldnumber7: i like the ocean
[02:01] oldnumber7: i like you more though..
[02:01] fearitferret: hahah me too, please don't ever make me leave it!
[02:01] oldnumber7: like a lot lol
[02:01] oldnumber7: deal
[02:01] fearitferret: you're bigger than me
[02:02] fearitferret: you have to take me deeper in the ocean
[02:02] oldnumber7: i got you
[02:02] oldnumber7: trust me im a waterman
[02:02] fearitferret: I trust you way more than I should
[02:02] oldnumber7: i know
[02:02] oldnumber7: i think we can do this, seriously
[02:02] oldnumber7: like a big adventure
[02:03] fearitferret: **** I love you, I trust you
[02:03] oldnumber7: thank you
[02:03] oldnumber7: let me earn it first
[02:03] fearitferret: I really don't want this to be a TOTAL UP choice
[02:03] oldnumber7: if it is then i would rather stay here
[02:03] oldnumber7: i feel happy
[02:03] fearitferret: but I'm here, do or die
[02:03] oldnumber7: do or die
[02:04] oldnumber7: exa.ct.ly
[02:04] fearitferret: be are be
[02:04] oldnumber7: kk
[02:04] fearitferret: like, 10 seconds tops ok, 30
[02:04] fearitferret: I HAVE TO ***
[02:04] oldnumber7: lol do ya thing girlie
[02:07] fearitferret: I spent so long swearing you wereit for me
[02:07] oldnumber7:  
[02:07] oldnumber7: baby
[02:07] oldnumber7: hey
[02:08] fearitferret: I am scared you'll take this away again
[02:08] oldnumber7: i will do everything in my power for that not to happen
[02:08] oldnumber7: i promise
[02:09] oldnumber7: i am a fool, but not such a big one to leave you...
[02:09] oldnumber7: a second time
[02:09] oldnumber7: foolish the first time
[02:09] oldnumber7: i was so misguided..
[02:09] oldnumber7: i love you hah
[02:09] fearitferret: I mean I  understand what happened but "getting caught up in another chick" is pretty basic for not happening
[02:10] oldnumber7: yeah
[02:10] oldnumber7: ******* idiot, straight up
[02:10] oldnumber7: and i claim that
[02:10] fearitferret: I won't deny that
[02:10] oldnumber7: lol you'd be lying if you did
[02:10] fearitferret: but come on, you're awesome
[02:11] oldnumber7: im just doing what i told you, bootstraps
[02:11] oldnumber7: not mine, yours
[02:11] oldnumber7: thanks
[02:11] fearitferret: I guess that hinges on me knowing you much more
[02:11] oldnumber7: i am like a flower sorta haha
[02:11] oldnumber7: just serene
[02:11] oldnumber7: you know me already
[02:12] fearitferret: I'd like to think I know you
[02:12] oldnumber7: i am really excited to get to know you
[02:12] oldnumber7: we have a lot to learn from eachother
[02:13] fearitferret: ouch
[02:13] oldnumber7: we gotta remember, july 8th
[02:13] oldnumber7: you've shown me so much, but it's just a little bit of you
[02:13] oldnumber7: just like you've seen a little bit of me, in passing
[02:13] oldnumber7: like lights
[02:13] oldnumber7: through windows, incense through the drapes
[02:13] fearitferret: You've seen every bit of me
[02:13] oldnumber7: but i want all of you
[02:14] oldnumber7: i've sipped from your cup in my mind
[02:14] fearitferret: I've seen a bit of you, because I was too busy bitcing about myself
[02:14] oldnumber7: i was being crazy
[02:14] oldnumber7: loco
[02:14] oldnumber7: etc
[02:14] oldnumber7: still am a little
[02:14] oldnumber7: you know me
[02:14] oldnumber7: but im working on that
[02:14] oldnumber7: lol baby u look tired
[02:14] fearitferret: I love you baby
[02:15] oldnumber7: you worked hard today huh
[02:15] fearitferret: always have, always will
[02:15] oldnumber7: exactly :3
[02:15] fearitferret: I'm glad you came back
[02:15] oldnumber7: somehow
[02:15] oldnumber7: i didn't think i wanna gonna make it man
[02:15] oldnumber7: seriously
[02:15] oldnumber7: but im changing things
[02:16] fearitferret: I'm absolutely ****** in the brain babe
[02:16] oldnumber7: well another thing we got in common
[02:16] oldnumber7: ;3
[02:16] fearitferret: and I've spent decades
[02:16] fearitferret: fixing, and coforming and screaming about how I need help and then screaming about how I didn't
[02:16] oldnumber7: baby, that's okay
[02:16] fearitferret: and go on and on and on and on
[02:17] oldnumber7: then go on and on with me
[02:17] oldnumber7: we can do that
[02:17] fearitferret: babe
[02:17] fearitferret: look at me
[02:17] oldnumber7: hey
[02:18] oldnumber7: sorry
[02:18] oldnumber7: you're right, the now
[02:18] oldnumber7: now matters
[02:18] fearitferret: I would've killed, and then dreaded, then killed, then dreaded, then killed etc and etc for ******* hrlp
[02:18] oldnumber7: i wish i could've been there
[02:19] oldnumber7: be a rock like you were for me
[02:19] oldnumber7: in my mind
[02:19] fearitferret: For me, take all the help you can. I'll scream and beat on the walls for you if I have to, just, take the help I wanted but didn't get
[02:19] oldnumber7: paint in watercolors behind me while i sing
[02:19] oldnumber7: pick basil out of the garden
[02:20] oldnumber7: read a book somewhere
[02:20] oldnumber7: anywhere
[02:20] oldnumber7: doesn't matter
[02:20] oldnumber7: with my best friend
[02:20] oldnumber7: that makes my heart smile
July 8 2017, Heather
Jul 2017 · 368
Hummus & Cucumber
gravelbar Jul 2017
My love សំណព្វ saamnapv
For you សម្រាប់​អ្នក samreab anak
Grows like លូតដូចជា lout dauchchea
Flowers in morning ផ្កានៅពេលព្រឹក phka nowpel pruk

My heart បេះដូង​ខ្ញុំ behdaung khnhom
builds anthills កសាងអាកាស  ksang akasa
of memories នៃការចងចាំ nei kar changcham
you អ្នក anak

The everlasting now ជារៀងរហូតឥឡូវនេះ chea rieng rhaut ilauvnih
mine, yours អូនអើយឯង aun aey eng
friend មិត្តភក្តិ mitt phokte
Jul 2017 · 172
Untitled
gravelbar Jul 2017
Mother
Sweet basil flower
dew of morning
eye of cat
heart of honeydew

Trusting me through my untruthfulness
Like a orchid you sip water slowly
and bloom in the shade
of willow heart

Cows on the other side of the fence
Chew thine cud
Life turns
360 all day
La la la
Jul 2017 · 322
Hello My Friend
gravelbar Jul 2017
សួស្តី​សម្លាញ់
העלא מיין פרייַנד
اهلا صديقي
ওহে, বন্ধু আমার
ສະ​ບາຍ​ດີ​ຫມູ່​ຂອງ​ຂ້ອຍ
zdravo prijatelju
Salam dostum
नमस्ते मेरे दोस्त
Hola mi amigo
გამარჯობა მეგობარო
สวัสดีเพื่อนของฉัน
gravelbar Jul 2017
Growth of vines نمو الكروم
Eyes of rye عيون الجاودار
hypnotized منوم

Solid yet fluid الصلبة حتى السوائل
Aware and alive إدراكا حيا
Breathing تنفس
Now now now الان الان الان
The everlasting الأبدية
Now الآن

Flowers in bands on your wrist الزهور في العصابات على معصمك
eyes in curls عيون في تجعيد الشعر
like the smoke مثل الدخان
of myrrh من المر
Jul 2017 · 239
ealiana عليا
gravelbar Jul 2017
My friend, my comrade, come with me
صديقي، رفيقي، تأتي معي
sadiqi, rafiqi, tati m

To the seas of green, the land of coconuts
إلى البحار الخضراء، أرض جوز الهند
'iilaa albahhar alkhudara'i, 'ard jawz alhind

grab your arms, proclaim your freedom
انتزاع ذراعيك، وتعلن حريتك
aintizae dharaeik, watuelin huriyatak

Sawdust rains from your wrists
نشارة الخشب المطري من المعصمين
nshart alkhashab almitarii min almuesimin

                                            عليا
صديقي، رفيقي، تأتي معي
إلى البحار الخضراء، أرض جوز الهند
انتزاع ذراعيك، وتعلن حريتك
نشارة الخشب المطري من المعصمين
Jul 2017 · 299
Where did we go?
gravelbar Jul 2017
Moon spilling through a cloud, east
Eyes locked in incense spirals
A lovelock of moonstones
Ideath worn proudly
ideath worn quietly
Someone on the other end
breathing and her
Something between
like a rod of tired wind
Silent wind

The type of wind that blows down
egos and
dreams
and all ambition
ideath and trout
and i and the letter


And somewhere behind it all
An inspired lover
drawing his lovers portrait
for the first time
in flowers
only
flowers
May 2017 · 222
Lovestones
gravelbar May 2017
Things got a little better after you left
not right away of course
but scars heal
bones fuse stronger
etcetcetc

I'm happier alone I suppose
don't get me wrong
I love the feel of another body
sharing circulation momentarily
respiration exhaled like black moths

Dark side of people on display
cheap pieces of glass to
sell their soul too
the genie doesn't go back in that jar

Sourpatch sugar rush, coffee mainline
eyes like saucers
110 screaming in the rain
who cares anymore
really

**** your sensitivity
people eat eachother
literally *******
how much for one game
of Russian roulette
I already priced my life out
to the government
400,000 and a square of
dirt

Flick that zippo open
light up another camel filter 99
down that gas station coffee
same song over and over
and over and over and overoverover

๓໐໐ຖຟคtēr in your pores
l໐งēŞt໐ຖēŞ in your little garden
ѕραяяσωѕ fly with crows
šЋαđŏώš require sunlight
May 2017 · 226
M011IE
gravelbar May 2017
S E A R C H

a document to time, present, past, future

Twisted locks in dryer socks
Kiwi sprouting with the Tamarind....o
Gold on your wrist
like the **** they disassemble in India
Eating rice off of cut up plastic
coke bottles
Put the flame to them to sit flat


Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Drug : induced visions
time distortions
meet your ******* side
he's on your shoulder
whispering in ***
tattooing your soul onto
the back of a dollar bill

sanded flat
polished

inhale
exhale

it'll all be over soon
Mar 2017 · 182
Untitled
gravelbar Mar 2017
Pulling stiff new clothes out of a plastic shopping bag
   to wear to the funeral tomorrow
    why didn't you
     call before you
     left?

Where to put it all?

Another one, how is it possible
   just dog tags on a hill
     bottles of whiskey
        comrades
          left

Thyme & black pepper tea

  Xanax to **** the shakes
   coffee spilled on the *******
     floorboards
      again
Jan 2017 · 288
Drunken wandering
gravelbar Jan 2017
Cacti blooming in the moonlight
Water lapping on shore
The smell of your hair
The touch I adore
Profound devastation
A leviathan of sorrow
Spit in my face
So I can feel your warmth once more

Days in the ward writing notes
On how to live life and not suffer
Tears on sterile bedsheets
Meditation with killers
Eyes bent on damnation

Run the comb through his hair
Feel his scalp give way
Dandruff on your fingernails
Eyes like burnt plastic
Time endless, elastic

Rye beer, rye bourbon
Drink until the days shift
Hours turn to seconds
Days to minutes
Your smile winding down
Hours in Puerto Rico
On a bench in the center of San Juan
Drinking beer and making love
Hold me once again in memory
For old times sake

The medication I'm on works apparently
I just blend in
Not as crazy as I seemed
A ******* in color
Find me please
Among the juniper and pine

Strange sounds in the night
Like pinpricks on your spine
Saw a shift in the reflections
A killer coming for me
I'm sure of it
Lock the doors
Load the guns
Shotguns up front
Knives in pocket
Come at me you *******
Out of the night and train screaming sirens miles away
Come at me
End my misery

Spend every day on razor edge
Feel the tingle of action
Destroy every inhibition
Fall into nothing

Hookers and tattoos
Destroy what's left
Burn it all down
Sep 2016 · 361
La la la
gravelbar Sep 2016
*****
Mood stabilizers
Anti-psychotics
Xanax
Silence never felt to heavy

Just don't stop coward
Write what's in your heart
Like a doe leaping over fences
Entrails, somehow it fits
Snow on the lawn in Texas
A ****** salt nose dripping on lips
A first kiss in a creek surrounded by mule deer

Two spaces between each empty place
How do they get their names on
The **** bottle

Sitting on Orchard road, in front of the towers
Waiting for a friend or two
The six pack turning warm in its plastic bag
Taking sips under an umbrella in the rain
Espresso and Guinness
**** me for trying
Aug 2016 · 331
Blip
gravelbar Aug 2016
Chewing nicorette until your jaw
hurts
A Grateful Dead song as you switch
lanes
Glances in the rear view, making eye contact for the first
and last
time

Late nights on the tail gate
Looking at the same scene
Up and down the road
Found the hidden things
Between my feet
Above my head

And to finish it off
Another haiku I just wrote for you
To pass the **** time
Aug 2016 · 340
3
gravelbar Aug 2016
3
1
Airless in the morning motions
Every quiet moment shattered in self consciousness
Like coffee on new rugs

2
Flew straight up one time
Fell back down, found the humble ground
Unsteady but reassuring, press on

3
The next song reminds me
Of days spent in this same spot
Waiting on the next song
Aug 2016 · 222
Spoke
gravelbar Aug 2016
Wrote it down a while back
in the crawlspace
of memory
Woke in a strange place
with blankets of
strange cotton
Winter sheets and tired eyes
the broken space
between a footstep
Play it again in my head
for a while

Spoke for the white sand at midnight
Where I parted ways with all of it
Still remember nothing

Empty places between the graceless days
of blinked pupils
Empty spaces between the gaps in bad
conversation
I looked for you over every shoulder

A tired stare over glasses
into a glass of nothing
raise, sip, repeat
until life
hurts
less
Jul 2016 · 394
Inaction
gravelbar Jul 2016
Feeling alright for the first time in a couple days
don't know if I'm intoxicated
or just numb

Broken vases, vaulted nights
days spent in the embrace
of blissful inaction

A pile of pillows
no thoughts
still

I found my center
but it decided
it needed a while
to find me back
Jul 2016 · 272
Eyefull
gravelbar Jul 2016
The sunflower of my eyes
Hold me down
And let me go
Only 5 letters to get to the center of my soul
Unlock it all
Let the wind blow all the leaves out
Find me someday
With all the brass fittings back in order
The smile medicated into straight line
The eye like terminal pinpoint
Comrade
The tomorrows we dreamed
Died a few nights ago
So back into the snow
And no God shall walk
with thee
Jul 2016 · 438
Exclamation point
gravelbar Jul 2016
Chisel a poem out
for the hell of it
Scratch one out of sandy beach brush
watch the waves attempt
to destroy
you
fullstop.

Feel your lungs explode

Saw you for the last time 2 months ago
in a picture on my wall
and now I know
I will see you no more
pennies, dimes, happy rhymes
a nickle for a copper thought
brew me on home on damnation's
doorstep
Jul 2016 · 248
Duality
gravelbar Jul 2016
Shift left to center self
Dodge right and slight movement offsets imbalance
Center, focus on your breath
Jul 2016 · 212
Unfiltered
gravelbar Jul 2016
All the sun has gone
away for this brief span of time
Lost in a coffee cup
Jul 2016 · 275
Daffodils
gravelbar Jul 2016
Blank lines of text please
Those will fill this void between ears
If one could wish
Jul 2016 · 866
My Ocean, Your Sea
gravelbar Jul 2016
Eyes opening in the morning twilight
Nautical dispersion, sounds of high tide
Rough spun cotton cocooning naked bodies
The taste of ***** on your tongue
Eyes in the morning
like hammocks on Culebra, swaying in breeze
Eyes in the evening
Like ******* belts, simple & kind
The sand in our toes a microcosm within a macrocosm
The wind in your hair like notes of music to my ears
  Embrace me, my love
   my heart flys away
    like sparrows
     in the morning
Somehow found each other, our other half
Shells in the sand to a passerby
Patterns in a cloud like eyes staring towards blind stars
Feel of graphite disintegrating into words on paper
Backwash of proletariat diaspora, like my corazon
Emptiness suddenly filled with affection
Can a dead soul absorb such life?
Like the ocean you touch all my shores
Like waves, mingle my soil with your salt
Three words: I love you.
Jul 2016 · 433
Ward
gravelbar Jul 2016
The joy of nicotine gum
Pencils the size of your pinky finger
& the smell of ****
Jul 2016 · 748
Haiku?
gravelbar Jul 2016
Haiku is seven five seven.
Does that mean we leave things out?
Or leave it for interpretation?
Jul 2016 · 345
ELKAY Ezh20
gravelbar Jul 2016
Today I helped save 00036800
water bottles going to waste, so behold
my contribution to Mother Nature
Jul 2016 · 230
Watching T.V.
gravelbar Jul 2016
Politics or celebrity, two poisons
Stuff your soul into sharp cookie molds
Then turn off your brain
Jul 2016 · 314
Buddhakowski
gravelbar Jul 2016
Putting pieces of books together
Hidden messages between pages of composted life
Last poem, his greatest work
Jul 2016 · 260
Kevin
gravelbar Jul 2016
A creek to the Brazos
Cold water at high speeds
The redemption of energy & strong saplings
Jul 2016 · 343
94B
gravelbar Jul 2016
94B
Two sparrows
Sang shrill melodies
This afternoon
Jun 2016 · 325
Chelada
gravelbar Jun 2016
Habla nada
eyes on low
beam
Gusano
worm like men
with skulls
under
tattoo'd skin
For once
        Will you trust me?
Jun 2016 · 420
?
gravelbar Jun 2016
?
Died inside
for the
last
first
time
gravelbar Apr 2016
She wrote, and I quote,

   Star and mild flower
      You are mild girl mild mother
           And much much much more

Can you understand how I love you?
Like a country song on repeat.
   Like a memory under Tamarindo and Medalla

Grass on my clothing while I stare into emptiness
The blankness behind my eyes
Patterns in the hedges
Reflections of a part of the whole
A witness to all

Witness all my savior soul
Sacrifice your beauty for your health
And call more than once a year
Goodbye, call you later

Old Willie Nelson on the radio through the desert,
The sound of cactus blooming in the afternoon
next to the lake
The sound of fresh water flowing from springs
in succulent gardens

I picked these fresh
herbs for you
To make with your breakfast
my love
Could you run your fingers through my
scalp for a while
While the coffee
kicks in
And I find myself
kissing you
like a
boy
all
over
Apr 2016 · 259
Spoken
gravelbar Apr 2016
Cold liquor in my gut
Eyes in fennel
Picked all the basil yesterday
Can you make it be?
Once again my love?
I view and a room
And two bodies pushed into
contortions
Souls pushed to edges of drops
Evil to run itself
A soul meant to destroy and
implode

Holding you close in cold wind
The taste of martinis
A bullet in my heart already
When I heard you shiver under thin blankets
My love
Do not suffer
I can not
Sustain it

The pieces of myself
Spread out between two
states
And the blood from
gashes in my feet
In a scarf you still
wear
Feb 2016 · 241
You
gravelbar Feb 2016
You
Juniper,
growing in my garden,
  picked it between leaves of basil to sweeten my tea.
   Lover,
     found me between reef and sand,
       kissed me under full moon.
         I'll ride my bicycle a thousand miles.
          My love, with lips like a strain,  
            mouth like a hard set line, and I can feel your tears
               down my face as you make love to the sensory perceptions
                 of warmth and together.
                   I slog through this mud,  
                     watch gravel flick from boots.
                       I watch skulls meet into lips making root silence.
                         My love, kiss this dead skull
Jan 2016 · 420
Marena
gravelbar Jan 2016
Found a stem
Growing from dry earth
Found a kiss
Among sand
And the promise
Of waiting lips
Could you define a broken soul
Pieced together with
super glue and
clear
tape
My love, my everything
I cried when
You smiled
I cried when
You chirped at me
With those eyelashes like
clearcut pine
Pine needles stick into
Our hand knitted blanket
While you kiss my ear
as we make love
I find you hairs in my clothing
And think about nothing but the scent
Of your sweat on my lip
And the feel of your tongue
On our teeth
Ours ours ours
Find me
Dreaming
The ones we shared
In a desert where you passed water to me
like a bird
Lips against mine
Not a word spoken
But the warmth of your breast
Against my heart
Made me believe in
life again
Dec 2015 · 346
Love and other things
gravelbar Dec 2015
Novels of Kipling on the floor
Between bottles of ***
A smile I could find
like pocket change
Familiar and bright
words on my hands
In ballpoint abstract
The script on your teeth
Bite skin deep
expose my veins
so I can bleed
a verse onto
your breast
gravelbar Dec 2015
Unsettled lines, scores of blank words on the page, here I sit, smiling into the grit that found its way to the bottom of the coffee, settled at last

Like silt in the water tanks, stirred up by eager hands, the same that bear the scars of childhood into tired, sterile, lives; brushed off the stray dandelion feather a while ago

Gutters full of humanity discarded, smiling from the sidewalk as a million people shove by, this bundle of gray hair, emaciated arms, arthritic hands

Beggars bracelets, two for the price of one, a smile used often & certain of the uncertainty of life, been and seen I suppose

Buildings like beehives & 5 baht to take a ****,
beer courage & the sticky sweat of wanderer’s inebriation

Kids in the street following the trash truck for pocket change, a bottle of the strong stuff to keep it all moving

She smiled and I knew she was the one, to serve us drinks on a Buddhist holiday, grabbing tinted bottles from the stained bar wood, a gamblers grin over naked shoulders

The combination of nicotine & caffeine & strong drink, a *******’s blend, a broken moment in a sea of people, humbled by flashing neon & blank expressions, not pausing once to take in the madness of it

Like silt, we have found our way to the bottom again, the bottom of another tasteless cigarette, the bottom of another ****** bottle

Sunken chest sighs and yellow eyed smiles among the standing water of side streets & nameless alleys, accumulating life’s backwash, out of view for your convenience

Easier to change the channel & focus on what really matters, celebrity, fashion, a certain star’s daily interactions & a reality T.V. show to take a tour of their mansions

Worshiping fools, selling our minds for 3 easy payments of nineteen ninety five, delivered to your doorstep

Import your soul, bury it all in soil, sell your heart for a meaningless monetary sum, bury it all a foot down

4 a.m. & I can feel the tide winding its way down, leaving new patterns in the sand and garbage left behind

In broken English we pass the bottle & I learn that it’s easy to make a living selling cigarettes on the street to foreigners

We stumble our separate ways & I stand four stories up, the rain filling the gutters & pipes like *****, washing away the grime, replacing it with ozone & the scent of sewer

The girl with the heart necklace & orchids in her basket, a brief glance as we crossed paths, I still wonder who you could be

Buried in sighs, we weave our time out of glass, we twist & turn our lives into spires of wax, wilting wicks, the brightest seem to burn out first

Sitting in our own nowhere, you asked me if I loved you, told me to lie, I’m glad you gave me the easy out, I didn't want to hurt your feelings

I remember the look on your face those dark mornings, sipping gin and water, we watched the sun rise another day

Light the last cigarette & take our first step, I hope to see you around kid
Apr 2015 · 869
Heather
gravelbar Apr 2015
This one wild eyed child,
with the breath like
gin,
those cedar branches between teeth,
those handfuls of eyes,
those broken whispers and spit on my eyelashes,
a kiss between a day broken like cigarettes in the package.

Could you make love to a series of words,
or a painting on the wall,
or maybe a laugh between ***** sheets where our skulls bounce off each other,
could you love a dead smile?
Jan 2015 · 480
Riyal and Dinar
gravelbar Jan 2015
Today I shed some tired eyes
Under leaves, leaves with corners
and sharp edges
Today I shed some weary legs
Upward over the mountain
down into the streams
The fragrant and decaying
The cloying and the stagnant
Odd how a man can look over miles of open country
& see nothing but subdivisions
Odd how a man can look at another
& **** for a belief
Odd how a man can smile into the empty bottle
& see no light through the glass
Bones buried under sand a time, bulldozed another foot deeper
Someones kid hidden behind a picture in a wallet
We hid somewhere, in those bushes in the field
Hid from ourselves
Listened to the creek and tried to decipher language
The tea your brewed sits cold in my hands
And the smiles you shared sit cold in my lips
We drank together on the beach, me and these guys
Selling cigarettes to put food on the table
While their sisters sold themselves
And all I could decipher through my drunkness
Was that I wasn't supposed to be there
Never was, never was

I sit with these ugly ballpoint words and think of you
I sit with these grasshopper thoughts and think of nothing
I sit with my feet in still water, my eyes on dead clouds
I think of the broken days
Blackout wine bottle days
Writing on the wall on where to ride trains to
Through New Mexico, to drift
Fall off the face of it for a while
Bootknife nights

We spoke through the cigarette smoke
How we didn't choke I'm not sure
Made me put them down
For good

It was odd, watching those dogs eat those camels
In the sand dunes
The bodies of a car accident lopsided and covered in someones
sheets
Drove for days, small cities, large refineries
An empty ocean that seemed to carry its sand into the horizon
Dune after dune
Somehow we bargained a pack of smokes for two
Saudi riyal

I drank to much and said to little, she always said
Over and gone, pictures on the fridge
Sleeping at 2, waking at 5
Eyes heavy and the first cigarette
A cup of coffee and the slow realization
That the sun remains to rise
Jan 2015 · 560
Untitled
gravelbar Jan 2015
I shed the weight,
my pack off, and the dirt in my lungs
and the nicotine in my lip,
the copenhagen gave off quite a flavor,
and the smile on your lips  
gave off quite a character, and the coughed up dirt and sand,
and watched the clean ones walk by,
us drunk masers,
sipping water,
no,
chugging it, to get the dryness out,
and to make the world a little cleaner
with our spit, my comrades,
my compadres, my sombreroed
masters of delight.
watch casablanca
with
me
Sep 2014 · 558
For Jane, Doe
gravelbar Sep 2014
We sat in shade, watched cirrus circle sun, robbing temporary
warmth
Hands through burlap & jute, clutching at photons illuminating
eyelashes
Cedar sap & crushed pine needles, fragrant on our hands, amber &
ambient
Saw your heart through crooked teeth, the same as
mine
A hundred pounds of saw grass hair & pliable
emotion
Speaking of a hitch through New Mexico,  a night on that lake,
where you convinced me you could
make clouds disappear
Speaking of a first kiss in a creek bed, that night we watched
Javelinas and Mule Deer
Fireworks by the river, smoke so thick we lost
each other
Our ugly handwriting, tucked into breast pockets, notes on
the back of old receipts
Empty bottle love, scattered & sporadic,
ours, ours, ours
Mar 2014 · 580
To Binge
gravelbar Mar 2014
Spun up from ground level
A thousand blades of grass
Under a pair of scarred feet
Ocean breaks calmly on sand and smooth pebble
We find a space between it
Colors broken down into coded text
Light refracted, time distracted

I smiled under the shade of the paint chipped wall
Over the scent of juniper and gin
We drank from the bottle like heathens
Wandered crowds, a microcosm of a world
gone mad
Here’s to you babe, here’s to you

We chose this, you know?
Fleeting streams of style and ****** days
Of such tired contemplation
Collar bones carrying the ink of skilled fingers
dexterous and agile
These hands carry bones broken
set like jigsaws

A reflection of Koi and Hygrophila
A breeze through thin cotton
shirts
A smile, a smile and a hand to hold
As we adventure through this life,
wandering to wander


A moment to hear you breathe
Lungs full and tired
Heart ready to burst
Smoke the last one down to the ****
filter
Mar 2014 · 457
Slight and Pale
gravelbar Mar 2014
Unwashed and wild, we ran under street lamps of places
unknown
Unvarnished, the raw stuff below the
grain
Light spills from groups of inky syllables on chest, collar bone,
calf
From the exhale there is rebirth, sacred sterility and latex
lives
I found a place today, not my own, but mine the
same
Saw you there counting the crows and the petals of
dead flowers
Taking the tally between lines on crumpled notebooks,
torn loose leaf
We drank gin till the sun rose, and sighed, slight and
pale against me
Mar 2014 · 603
Rootlike
gravelbar Mar 2014
Words in the night, distant daytime conversations after the downpour
Smoke exhaled from heavy lungs like the last rain drops
Clouds reanimated in the cloying nicotine
Memories of a smile over kiwis cut crosswise
A bottle holds it all now, those memories
Memories closed and final
Wash the dirt from my hands
With loving pen strokes
Help me make the world fall
Away


Water in the mug, a smile like insects under heel
7 a.m., all alone, empty road, I’ll walk until
I lose my sole
The sun burns luminous
The day breaks lovingly
Fresh brewed love
Drank down like a poison
Spat a poem for you
Broke it all again
And here we sit among the blooming hyacinth
The moths on our skin like the gin we sweated out
In the night over Roman candle illumination
Oh tell me, oh spell me, cover me with your algebra
Little notes on hand or thumb
A loving limb separated with skilled hands
The subtly of your heart
Sewed so skillfully to my dullness
Strong hands have retired to
Holding a basket of bitter apples  

I have found a quiet place to write it all down
A silent place to find the distinctions between sounds
In our absence such life has grown
In our tolerance such symbols have been sketched
I found the gap between the stones
Delved in the depths of a bottle or two
Stacked stones on the shores of empty
Bodies of water

Love sketched out in five
Letters
Jun 2013 · 1.8k
Swallows & Crows
gravelbar Jun 2013
All the clouds went away today
The sky decided to **** me
Sweat burning, eyes cloudy
Shake the sand from rotten boots
Pick the pebbles from ugly scabs
I clear my throat & fill my lungs
***** my soul with another
tasteless cigarette
This is life & we all want
no part of it anymore
Jun 2013 · 1.4k
Desert Voodoo
gravelbar Jun 2013
Stones in my pocket, dirt on my face, in my lungs
I couldn't quite respond when you first smiled at me
Such pale eyes, you sat in your blue room
among wilted wildflowers & bamboo out the window
I felt so perfectly awkward, shy as a child
Reading in the corner, the silence spoke for us
You smile for wind chimes & laugh at the sunrise
Took my hands & traced your tattoos with bitten fingernails
Sparrows in black & white, held me there between collar bones, rising & falling
Held me when I slept, somehow our dreams were in step in the morning
I write this today, the bamboo long gone, your touch a memory
From a blue room, nothing more than paint chips on the floor
Perfect days wasted between your pale arms, somehow I
can't forget them
Mar 2013 · 731
Lustless
gravelbar Mar 2013
Some days the sky hurts more than the rain that falls
from it
Broken pots on hand wheels, smoked cigarette butts in the
gutter
Half sipped bottles of Beam and Cognac on the
floor
I found a lovely ray of sunshine today
Smoking in the half-light of dead buildings
We used to drink here, remember?
On cold December nights when the lights were
waning moon, dim
I grab at mornings slept in
I grasp days unattended
Wasted days like empty bottles
Pour out the rainwater on dried up
plants
Nothing much left to do but
light another
For a while at least..
Jan 2013 · 1.5k
Latitude & Longitude
gravelbar Jan 2013
I always thought one day I’d write something worth reading
So far, just lines and lines, used up catchphrases
I slumber in the pine needles and breathe in the scent of cut
Juniper
Bathe in the shadow of sundials as the day fades, turns smiles to
moonlit slumber
In the green grass among the dead leaves I lay my head and listen to
leaves changing color
On the cold sand I listen to high tide turn to low, the rolling of the rocks and the
breaking waves of foam
The birds in the trees sing of bamboo forests in her backyard, blue room where she
collected rocks and lucky charms
Books with pages torn out, arrowheads she found in the field, a feather in
her hair
Pale blue eyes which reflected my dullness, reading Camus by the door
She used to read to me, when the sun was sinking and my head was spinning from the
last cigarette
And hold me like a child, hold me with my eyes shut and my lungs screaming to speak one
simple phrase
To grab the pen, to open my eyes and speak symbols onto the page, make my ballpoint
sing
To read a word worth reading, to write a line worth writing, this is my desire
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