I have been absorbing darkness
For a long time
Painting my burning rays
Across where you could not see
Do you feel lighter
Now that you are illuminated
I was not hungry
But I have swallowed up your sins
Spit them out as blessings
For you to feast
It hurts to heal
But I will not make it
Any harder than it has to be
I am here for your journey
You will never know
The role you play in mine
I could find you
Blind and mute in the dark
I would not even struggle
I only wonder
Why you lost me to begin with
There is no grievance between us
I will seek you
Until you are whole again
I am all the broken pieces
Of anyone I have ever loved
I am all your pain and your guilt
I am your fears and bitter truth
I am the voice of reason
Telling you, you are worthy
Taking your pitiful currency
As gold
I am the temple
The offering
I am the unburdened
Go, and be light
You are free
Even of me

I do not expect
For you to count me as a loss
When you never valued me at all

This is a fun little game game we play
You break my heart
And I leave you alone

I was chosen
Not to be loved
But to absorb your violence

I prophesied I would haunt you
Now I truly am your ghost
Abandon me of your shadow
As I released your soul
We are not bound to each other

How quickly we unravel
Skein of time slips into knots
I cut the cord
Wicks burn down to nubs
We are not bound to each other

Relinquished of your promises
I of my duty
I told you I had healers hands
You place yourself beyond reach
We are not bound to each other

Do not look for me in your dreams
Do not call for me in your sleep
I am not there
My spirit never had a place to rest
We are not bound to each other

Pray for closure, beg for it
Perhaps God will hear you
Perhaps he will care
There are no grudges here
We are not bound to each other

Said you would die for me
Now you are dead to me
Dig your grave, to lie in it
Surrogate funeral for your spirit
We are not bound to each other

I forgive you
Of your sins and lies
Time will fill your gap
Nothing will stead for me
We are not bound to each other

Do not seek me
When we are reborn
If you are healing
If you are well
There will be no reason for me

The halfway angels are speaking again
You do not need ears to hear them
They are a sight to behold
I have been lingering
In the silent place for many eons
I cannot name what baited me
Or what kept me for so long
Invisible burdens
Live by gravity’s promise
I have quietly wondered
If you would whisper in my ear again
I would not beg plea or ask
What have I made of time
The same human foolishness as before
You beg for change
That you will not see through
Heaven does not laugh or cry at our plight
Only looking down in wonder
As the journey marches on
Will you take me to the river
Wash me clean
Of this tarnish rusting up my skin
Baptist me until I am pure
Until we are white lights
Against the Milky Way

I was a fool
When I asked to feel something
God couldn’t you have chosen
Anything, but this
Anyone, but me

Do not tell me of my strength
My resilience
My stamina

She is a strong tower
She is a mighty fortress
I run to her
I run from you
I run