Guttural depths enclose me.
The vast expanse, like a tomb.
I am surrounded on every side by dark waters.
The endlessness is suffocating.
The immensity, my prison.
The deep, my grave.

Depression
epression
pression
ression
ession
ssion
sion
ion
on
n
­I'm turning into everything I promised myself I wouldn't be.
Everything I hate.
I'm losing all the values I've lived by.
All the values I've tried so hard to emulate.
I hate myself.
I hate this world.
I hate everyone in it.

I'm trying to be a better man.
The only person I have to prove it to is myself.
How about you?

Everything that I have is being taken from me.
The freedoms I once held dear are being stripped.
Everything a human being is entitled to is being stolen.
My happiness has been replaced with sadness.
Hatred.

The life that I had was so great.
It was filled with friends, food, and fulfillment.
I now have to struggle for all of these.
My friends are slowly becoming acquaintances.
The food is no longer filling and enjoyable.
My actions no longer make me feel good about myself.

Now I'm second guessing all the choices I make.

Their is a bright side though.
It shows through occasionally.
Looking into my sisters happy eyes.
Having a good times with my friends.
Doing the right thing because it's right.
No God is telling me to do these things.
No Bible is explaining why.

This is a good life.
I should be happy.
I'll add that to my list.

I crest in time
for a while
'til some shore
runs me out
Where does a wave
go
do i continue
through the earth
am I one of many
songs softening
a ball of concen-
tration making
spin a majestic
chord in prog-
ression just now
is this
am I
dancing some-
how could this be
dancing some-
how with
particular abandon