.i cannot do justice to Hölderlin's invocation of Hyperion, but i also have no intention to, but i'll begin with, what isn't regarded as a pristine, classical constellation:

it begins with a punt volant,
on first observation,
   ・
      which descends in brightness
         ano teleia -
romanic interruption of the added
comma beneath it,
like a tail dragging the head along...

    the constellation?

        a dismembered man,
a crooked pentagram,
and a trinity of sorts...

                              .          .        
    ­            ・                   .    
                                           .
        .

                       .

                                       .

this, the dislodged man,
with a trinity of stars floating
outside of him...

the trinity is faint...
when you first spot the ano teleia
star with its brightness...
yet that is a mishandled
pentagram...

which brings me to the argument,
some people send their DNA
to companies that
discover their genetic makeup,
i also read a newspaper article
that stated:
why bother?
you genetic make-up
also consists of what
you gravitate to,
culturally...

    so... i'm reading an article
on Hyperion...
and then i follow several links...
all i know is that the Vikings
were the founders of
Kiev...
                
   and to get to Kiev from Norway...
you have to go past the land
i was born in...

   then working from an article
on Emperor Julian, the Apostate...
then onto an article on Mardonius...
then on the article on the Goths...

Goths?
  Swedish "vikings"...
  who had established settlements
in the region of Poland were
i was born,
by 250BC...
                  
   so... why would i cling to
Nordic folk songs,
or their revisionism,
if i... suddenly hear a song,
and react with goosebumps on
my cheeks from hearing it?

or what about the remnants
of Scythia?
           boiling in my veins?

that newspaper article was right,
i don't need to send off my DNA
sample to companies,
i can read my DNA from the culture
i'm migrating toward!

     Hyperion,
i have abandoned the Athenian gods
of Olympus,
i've looked elsewhere,
to the mountain that became
the pit of Tartarus...
look back at Uranus, and sampled
the wintry perfumes of Gaia...

          swam in the ***** of Pontus...
and i have...
seen how both the gods,
and the titans...
   are the source of etymological
classification,
unlike what the judeo-christian tranditions
teach...
Adam didn't name the birds
and the animals from an a priori
posit / advantage point
of some obscure inheritance...

        first come the grander things...
man conjures up the existence / non-existence
of either gods, or titans...
to spin the wheel and gain etymological
momentum!
            
of what became the ****** of the affair
between Helios and Gaia...
    however true...
   or untrue...
      there is still an etymological foundation
for the existence of said
names...
   the names / not beings...
that spawn more names to be attributed
to such miniscule things
as flies, centipedes and pebbles...

from the word Uranus, comes the word
Helios,

from Selene comes the word
which coincides
the words Pontus, Oceanus, Poseidon,
and subsequently the
moon's influence of the tides...
the... παλίρροιες (palirroies,
siblings of the furies, the rivers,
and all other nymphs)...

      but however ridiculous applying
these nouns is...
they are rigid evolution
of words, formerly grunted,
or expressed in a barbaric way...
these are the words first defined...

Gaia probably became perfected
when there occurred a syllable
arithmetic... well... "arithmetic" is a lose
term of addition...
    the syllable g'ah! g'ah!
combined with i'ah!
                            
stealthy *******, this Jewish god,
he knew it all along...
hide in the letters,
hide in phonetics,
hide long until...
there's a second Belshezzar moment
in history...
when he's seen a second time...

i see him!
the surd H and the laughter
instigator H of the tetragrammaton...
you sigh when you write AH...
you express a vague awed-surprise
when you write OH...
    H represents the breath...
and the soul...

i see him!
i write too much to not be able
to dis-guide you from doing likewise...
the breath enter with an AH
and an OH...
   ah as in wonder with a surprise,
oh, as in counter: so i was wrong?

ooh... like something is teasing
you...
    uh? as in an element of disgust...
but?
HA?
       the point...
the point being?
laughter...
                    how else can you
express laughter,
if not balancing on the Jewish
definite article,
i.e. HA, i.e. HA-shem (the-name?),
how?!

but the Greeks were of some use...
their names of Titans and
Greeks?
   etymological boot-camps...
what we began with,
and, ultimately,
what we return to,
not for bowing, prayer,
belief...
but?
            *momentum...
    
we already that Zeus is actually
Thor,
   who's father, Odin,
is Uranus...
                    so, technically...
Zeus is Thor...
                     Prometheus is Loki...
etc. etc. etc.,
      point being...
these similarities, these correlations?
they're not, they're not,
plagiarisms...
                        they would be plagiarisms,
if they had similar etymological
beginnings...
they're not plagiarisms,
because even now,
not everyone on this earth is a bilingual
entity that could
support a globalist agenda!
      if bilingualism was rife,
then the liberals could have their
globalist "unity"...
              but since bilingualism is the lesser
half of the polymath...
    no...
              isolated communities
have isolated ideas...
they look as if they were plagiarisms
now... but then?
   the only globalist artifact left these days,
the Socratic argument for
universal, convergent purposes -
and particular, divergent practicalities...
these religions were not
plagiarisms...
   do you really think that
plagiarism is a pulverizing motivational
tool for the perpetuation
of a people's existence?
   i don't think so...
                      plagiarism doesn't drive
people...
it's just a strange coincidence that
there are similarities that could be conceived
as plagiarisms...
but then again...
****... me and this Mongol share
a very similar physiognomy...
  and... oh ****... we're standing up-right...
have five limbs...
   and we use fire to cook food...
yeah... the religious plagiarism issue is
really suspicious...
we weren't, ever, to make a similar conclusion...
since we all, supposedly led a mass
exodus from Africa...
     like **** we did...
     perhaps...
               but the story doesn't begin
with an origins...
   more... what happened in what
became localized eventualities of segregation...
hey... i might have, 100 year... ha ha!
yeah right... to write my own narrative...
i don't like the antithesis of
doubt: of the perfected plethora of
the antithesis of both faith & denial...
     i like my rainbow plethora of doubt
to "counter" faith & denial...
   given that i also don't like
the pseudo-schizophrenic dichotomy of
faith, contra denial.
- makes for a more exciting
content of the heart... what? doubt;
doubting Thomas
  with a heart like a sinking stone,
and fire in his eyes,
                    a, second Belshezzar.

They ask me to stand up
to exercise and play,
to run, to swim, to fly.
Very well...

One and all advise quiescence,
recommend counterpoisons, refer doctors.
they peek on me, perplexed.
"What's wrong?"

They suggest new sightings,
to try and get out, to not travel,
to cease living and to not perish.
It doesn't matter…

One and all see my struggle
for my bewildered expectancies,
the stumble of my now fickle nerve.
I do not consent…

One and all pick on my plagiarisms
with relentless blades,
judging, berating, amused.
I feel fear.

Frightened of everything,
of this morning's light, of the certain defeat.
For today I'm just a mortal,
decrepit and ephemeral.

For all this and more, on these short days
I'm not listening, I'm not here.
I yield, I strive again, I succumb.
I lock myself with and I open up to
my worst and most treacherous enemy,
"U" (my ego)

well, it would really become a problem...
if i were still jerking off and had a girlfriend / wife...
the ladies are looking for ultra-violent ****,
it's just a tease off ***** -
there's choking there's *******:
oddly enough... no yo-yo of Watergate?
me... i'm not willing to be shamed...
i still have my ******* -
she can have her webcam e-thot or whatever
the hell the internet **** is: memes my ***...
once upon a time it was merely called graffiti...
i don't see how darwinism can make
a 2nd coming resurgence in the 21st century...
fine... when it first came out at the end
of the 19th century: and opened the floodgates
for the 20th... and thanks to the physicists...
lasso! rein 'em in! rein 'em in:
for the fireplace and the ******* kumbaya...
the girls are looking and having finally decided
on an spanish omelette: but not a french ****
quiche... eggs and more eggs...
while i'm strapped to ******* one genocide
after another into the tissue and
flushing it down as: meat for the crocodiles
and tapeworms pretending they know how
play the parasite attaching themselves
to a white all white: white even if you're copper
skinned, cinnamon, hot choc or...
it's still a white tadpole racer...
i usually get off on looking at some xenia wood
cleavage...
it helps to tell apart the *** cleavage and
the breast cleavage...
i moved from: ******* snaps and started peering
at: when a woman pretends to perform
the lotus on a man's face...
and there's like... a floral pattern involved
with gulping oysters...
have i ever licked an ***-hole?
oh my... have i...
**** - *** 1-on-1... doom... 1st person shooters...
never the 3rd person ghost moving
the body...
am i missing something? the girls are
looking for extreme ***... i'm looking for
cleavage and teddy bears -
and the borderline before the whole body
exfoliates and what not...
as marquis de sade said: it's hardly something
i can control when i have a hard-on
almost 4 times during the day...
if i had a girlfriend... if would be crass to:
sly one in...
but... *******... no woman no cry...
it would be truly sad if i was in a relationship
and still up to the shambles of: not up to any
or the odd sort of good -
there's always this shared approach -
the wants and willingness needs to by made
synch. - they need to be a woman and a man:
polyphony - orchestra!
why write about ***? oh hell...
watch me write anything else -
my linguistic infatuations - *** and all manner
or picked ******* sells -
or... at a catholic school they would still teach
you about the perils of sniffing glue -
apparently the 1960s never happened -
no l.s.d. was ever dropped -
the pints of guinness were drank -
the cement was poured as the muscle to
the iron rod skeletons...

and when i finally achieved a beard worthy
of a post-25 year old - when the full
bush sr. happens - i forgot to curate
a body for: the objective safety of being watched...
or how the hell you word:
prior to the beard i focused on the face
and later the body...
and long hair...
once the beard arrived...
**** it... let's take to donning the Elijah
look... the beard comes way way ahead
of the nose - and now i'm still looking
for my neck -

it's *** it's only spectacular about once...
i've had that once spectacular -
i even got a tattoo -
oh... not me... i'm the dragon alien curl...
where my scar is...
on her right shoulder-blade...
and that's not even as if i branded her
myself...
she was going to fit me out with
dreadlocks and a tattoo of her totem at
the time - a scorpion -
thankfully i read about all this crap
in high school...
nick hornby's high fidelity -

it's still a very musical affair...
i remember what love at first sight looks
like to a fresh 17 year old
novosibirsk girl... siberian girl...
all the way west in edinburgh...
she gobbled the iPod and the playlist...
a near complete oeuvre of iron maiden...
and the odd songs...
while i was correcting two girls attempting
to make pancakes...
girls! you need to put some oil into the dough...
this is dough you'd make a sponge cake with...
so the story goes...

but *** was only spectacular once...
the rest of the time i think i was minding an itch...
even these days...
among... aha! that nag hammadi word:
in the Barbelo - the brothel -
no: i will not study the etymology -
in the brothel nothing spectacular ever happens -
you chance upon a ***** -
you're asked whether you want to use it -
you decline -
to play judas with the lips -
you pay an extra ten quid for you-feeding-the-oyster
suckling and all other leech comparison of oral...
ventures...
it's done - the mirrors are witnesses...
the lights are dimmed - two beached whales
on the shore of a bed of crisp linen -
and no one-night-stand
cocoon *** *******!
how do people stand these cocoon ***:
under the bed-sheets moments?!

because it would be really harsh to have a girlfriend...
and still have to *******...
at least without a girlfriend i can solve
the mystery of the throne of thrones -
no. 1 no. 2 and no. 3 -
then a quick baptism in the shower -
i sometimes found that doing the no. 3
helps with a constipation
of a no. 2 on: the throne of thrones...

- and as someone who discovered *******
before he could produce ***** -
well - the ******* is a "side project" -

because this world already needs no more
puritanical quips -
all this ******* stigmata looms over
the circumcised men -
but of course it would - why wouldn't it?
can you scratch your nose
if you cut-off the "un-necessary" rubicon /
cartilege?

would a balding scalp Adam ever scratch his
head - quiver - i thought that only stubble
and hair prompted one to scratch one's skin?
if i see a bald man scratching his head:
i'll let you know!

the plague of circumcised men's stigmata -
and if i had a girlfriend and she wasn't
"up to speed" like me: quasi marquis de sade
"might expect"...
**** me... even Chikatilo "fathered" children...
so much for "excuses": 2 to be exact!
nominee for bachelor of the year...
205th year (circa) coming:
Kant - the prussian watchmaker in
a coming of: calculating the promenade of
excuses - no famously i didn't / wouldn't
marry -

if you asked what i used to do
on those warm spring nights...
back in ol' satellite of the former u.s.s.r. -
and that... we entertained ourselves...
catching cockchafer beetle and catching girls
and tugging at their t-shirts and throwing
them in...
we: used to that sort of thing...
what better reason to drink seeing
the youth of today:
as a seemingly old dounding man:
well... in your 30s you sort of hit that zenith
of mortality's vitality on offer -
as much as technology is celebrated -
its change - it's impetus -

what's that... quote?
when an unstoppable force (technology) meets
an immovable object (ontology) -
or at least: i find man's ontology
to be forever played and plagued
by a priori "prepositions": genes -
and technolgoy is forever the a posteriori
counter-fact: of what much later...
much much later... in limbo land of history
becomes an: artifact escaping archeology...
now are we all not wishing
for some variation of closure?

memes: represented as genes?
really? i see them nothing but a cheap south-paw
jab's worth of the otherwise obvious:
graffiti (representation)...

girls are really searching for violent *** -
having **** fantasies?
my my - and here i was looking
for a xenia wood cleavage and some Bronzino:
you never have curbed your pornographic
enthuasiasm: if you never ******
off at...
mein gott! it's a meme!
1st comes god's index finger touching
adam's index finger in:
michelangelo's fresco of the creation of adam...
but the higher 2nd?
venus' tongue teasing the tongue
of cupid in Bronzino's cupid, folly and time...

i ****** off to that painting -
it's hard to stop a boy who knew how to:
prior to the kippah-guilt tripping:
no minus the ******* into early teenagehood...
i don't think i have yet to have dumped
the proper load on this: exercise - just yet...

oh the shame:
thankfuly this is england and no h'america -
and jesus is not the queen or king -
ol' lizzie is still playing poker and...
the constitution is and what i will not become
is this "vox populis" of a people
disaffected as to why the tax goes into the
pomp & circumstance and none of it:
thank god! ever goes into sense & sensibility
akin to the consort Middleton family;
that's highly replica prone...
blue-bloods... love them or hate them...
at least you can sight them as
almost unchanging -
sphynx head while the body changes
from male to female - but the sphynx is still there...

of an erectile-dysfunction: i would most certainly
hear if i had a girlfriend...
as it happened - the "free women"
always gave me a limp...
in the brothel i was there and she was there -
and i was she and she was i
and we weren't bothered about
counting two transgender sheep
of the nag hammadi library -

even on those one-night stands:
erectile-dysfunction - dim lights two beached
whales on the bedsheets i could stomach...
in a brothel...
but then she took me home
like some morrissey wallow and...
it was all about cocoon ***...
i've heard that temperature changes
the *** of frogs upon insemination...
cocoon *** under the bedsheets...
i stopped going out...

it's might almost sound like boasting:
believe me... it's disgruntled sarcastic... the overtone
to these words...
even i tried teasing a fetish with
latex lucy - but... then i thought about...
if you start wearing the same clotches
for god knows how long -
like an imitation of dog's hair...
you'd wish to squish into something
less pardonable / expected like a full gimp
imitation of lizard latex...
but violence an ****?

maybe that's why i started to tease
1970s italian classics...
dubbing from belgium and amsterdam
and all that...
but always after the torso cleavage -
always after the Om-onomatopeia look of
absent eyes and boiling tongues in a gurgle...
the contorted final stages of the face
before the lesser death as:
faking birth in ****** -
or what the hell you call: scavenger of:
never the lost details...
and if i had 7 children in the bag i would be
a fraud... and if i had a girlfriend
i would be a fraud and hopefuly ashamed...

came the white flag... came the rainbow flag...
came the ******* flag...
came the image: how would you ever find
yourself in a desire to blink: to peacock flutter...
without a pair of eye-lids?
hmm...
all those ******* freed arguments...
not coming from the "progressive school"
of islam -
or the hasidic jewry where:
a woman is to made to make concessions?
otherwise: waiting for that
golden moral maxim Confuscian wifey?

that a deity should...
somehow give moral laws...
i thought that man was the moral lawgiver?
if god were to become the moral
law advocate...
man should most certainly become
the physical law-giver - or at least:
to best serve my attention -
attempt fictional escapes via superhero
infantilism...

again: historiological infantilism -
the only serious history we are supposed to know
comes from h'america...
the civil rights movement -
that's serious history!
everything else is infantile historicism -
interchange of historicism and historiology -
yes - heidegger's leftovers...
but what is serious history?
and what is infantile history?
oh i'm pretty sure much of history kept in
agitated dust is: cowboys vs. indians
roleplaying... games...

cite anything serious of the past...
if there's no stampede toward some platonic exit...
then serious history happens with
the h'american civil rights movement...
after that we only have journalism
and bad idea dear diary entries...
of the next to come: ***** teenager
plague by acne and the many more oopses to come...

- and with the world saturated by:
an **** of forms - wielding their interwine and
maggot pit of "metaphors" -
better i write this than speaking during *** -
what could possibly saturate the "land"
that's already a swamp -

somehow i'm not edging toward a moral
superiority - the day i discovered
that god was both the god of writing
physical: and moral laws...
i was assured by the chinese that:
all kosher and all halal would pass
the test of the: 3 peepsqueaks...
no? do not eat a pig: do not eat a mandarin!
god only knows what the pig ate...
god forbid you ever knew the full
menu of Beijing!

pigs are the: das schlechteste!
das äußersteschlechteste!
pigs, mandarins, bats...
the bubonic plague, rats,
"supposing that africans would ever ****
monkeys"...
why would africans ever
**** monkeys...
i'm supposed to be ashamed of
having a hard-on...
while the white girls rummage
the carousel!

i could suppose the chinese already
ate the supposed ****-buddy to begin with...
it's no more funny when the "thing"
spreads like a mongolian shy-auxilliary
brigade of: voyeurs of:
the only evolution we are to be concerned
with, is to be better associated
with viruses, parasites and lice...

and if i were to live a sheltered western
liberal elite life... "elite":
the bigger the mouth the bigger the... whatever...
no complaint from the arabs
itching over well curated pork...
they'll allow the mandarin diet! no problem!

it's no problem...
pigs are the "problem"... when a god devolved
to invoke moral laws: his most high!
and it was "somehow" not man...
how can god, a monotheistic god...
give both physical laws and moral laws?
to me that's near impossible!
ah... unless this god is given
the "plotheistic" splinter of being
a theistic god and not a deistic god...
a theistic god gives both physical
and moral laws... a deistic god gives:
no moral laws: he was expecting
we could do so!

i can't believe in a god that plagiarises
man's activity -
man can't change the laws surrounding gravity...
yet to be known whether light
is somehow subjected to gravity...
but a god does not intervene by giving
moral laws...
having already established physical laws...
entertaining himself in the playground
of metaphysics...
only a prince... the devil -
would ever... intervene as god to give...
higher authority: a plagiarism of
man-made laws...
and call them: with deity origins...
why would a "god" meddle in:
you will not steal, you will not ****...
when...
god has set up a recycling centre?!

god is no judge, prosecutor, lawyer,
defendent, the accussed,
the jury over moral laws...
he is the epitome of physical laws:
the unchanging...
to have confused divine intervention
with a god bowing -
before and succumbing to...
man's ordiance... a moral law...
god does not allow himself moral qualities...
and god would not discriminate
against a pig: saying:
but the pig is the most economic piece -
had not man found the boar and
domesticated it?
the boar became the pig domesticated!
and the pig can be eaten...
from snout to tail and with only
the oink missing!

for a god to be so degraded as
the arbiter of physical laws -
to be ***** into giving moral laws...
only a devil would...
only a devil would...
only a devil would play with man's moral
laws... and attempt to supress
the already constaining impossible
with his cameo in egypt -
that machiavelli of sorts...

if the quran attempts to question
the cleanliness of pigs:
and god made the pig...
or rather made the man and the boar
and allowed man to domesticate the boar...
sick... ugly... but...
kept the mandarin: pristine!
save the pig... eat a mandarin!
if you dare...

how much do i abhor these infernal riddles:
how much i abhor scolding the bacon:
is also as much as:
you deserve the beijing sneeze!
you should let it palm tree vacate
and spread in the united arab emirates!
oh.. go on go on go on!
who's not looking?!

i only have old teutonic anthems to listen
to... because...
i like the way german sounds,
how german sounded...
how german will sound...
because at least german is not english...
and that's almost asking for a plum
tattoo of hue under the teasing
socket and the cheekbone: when in england...

no zeppelin echo you hear?
encore! again! again!
it's not o.k. to eat a pig according
to the hebrews of the muslims...
the mandarins will act worse than pigs
that the classical monotheists speak of...
a cat could catch a mouse...
but a cat could not be served a mouse
on a platter... what's that dish called?
the 3 peepsqueaks?
and pork is bad?
pork is just the tip of the iceberg
concerning these omnivores...
at this point... perhaps cannibalism?

islam go back home: check if there are
any mandarins living among you...
pork is bad... pork is bad!
this is not being paranoid this is me being funny!
pork is bad and your pseudo-god
of man-made moral plagiarisms!
*******: snippet the ******* but sure you
hell and bring me the niqab!
no *******? no niqab...

why are you looking at me?
i'm a tired old european...
why should i know what floats the boat
over in h'america?!

this "god" and the "intervention"...
oh i'm pretty sure we made our moral laws...
they weren't exactly to translate as a morality =
claustrophobia...
"god"...
               a belief that the same god
created the physical laws / barriers...
and somehow... decided to... plagiarise, human,
moral laws...
how this "god" decided to become
architect of physical laws...
and the interpolator of morals?
really?

a god that's critical of pork per se:
******* sheep ******* the semites...
but not critical of the mandarin diet?
that's no god; "at least not to me"...
the god that made gravity critical
as immoveable...
but a secondary god that...
was ignorant... of the fact that...
humans already punished stealing
and ******?!
why require a doubled emphasis?!

it's as if "god" made an entrance -
when no pyramids were to be built...
it's not: oh no...
we were never given any a priori parameters!
we were always supposed to sink into:
the thinking of being free...
let's face it...
at best: bad operatics of
madame butterfly at best:
only a soap opera.

close proximity word-compounds are sometimes the hardest to invert onto themselves, to craft a chiral pivot, notably due to the suffix-blindspot of the non-differentiated prefix antonym, even more so, when guarded by close proximity of words such as hubris / hiatus - esp. when was begins one's logical approach, inducing a misnomer tangle - due to the overtly laden verbum similis; and these little schematic squares of extremely confrontational, but also the more so extremely cohabitable ref. points, will always be harder to master, than say: a rigid rhyme schematic of a sonnet.

all this current talk of protecting free speech,
cf. with the writing i'll cite -
well, so much for a freedom that can
invite both the sophist and babbling of
slanging slurs -
      all in all, in defence of the "freedom" of
speech, is just as well, a: freedom for
idle talk - and if not idle talk, then simply
politicised intrigue, that once gained
the ears of salon ladies at liberty to an alt.
to ****** arousal.

and how did this come about?
   oh... well, what people talk about now,
is what people thought about in the 1920s
and the 1930s...
                  
as heidegger points out, regarding a herr
oswald spengler - der untergang das abendlandes
(1918 - 1922 vol. 1 & vol. 2 respectively):
the famous suggestion of a *decline of the west:
paragraph opening -
          why is herr spengler in noting
a decline? not because of the heroic optimists
being correct with regards to this apparent
decline - modernity as the unfathomable
stretch toward a status quo eternity -
and with darwinism, the theory of relativity,
the big bang, quantum physics -
there's about as much worth of a question-worthiness
these days, as there is a needle's worth
in a haystack of airy tumbleweed answer-unworthiness...
these former optimists of the decline
   have turned into ardent pessimists of
there even being a decline -
      
the oeuvre of psychology did the most damage
in the end -
   still mingling with an archaic sophistry of
astrology, tarot and the voting ballot -
       no shred of a doubt that we live in a one
way street of: answers & denials only, please,
questions & doubts, ooh noo noo noo!
         we do not live worthy of a question -
since by question we mean: ridicule being
the only appropriate answer deserved by
asking a question.
              
    it came with the change of hiatus between
   the two factions -
   once the optimists took to hubris -
                   the pessimists take to hiatus -
if we called them heroic optimists -
we now call them optimists in hubris -
  once we called them lunatic pessimists
and ultra-religious leash bearers -
     now we call them: young people who
forgot to take chances, risks, and thrills...
  cushion padded wet charcoals that
have as much potential to burn as -
                               a dolphin getting dry.

and aphorism 105 (VI) does just that,
   100 years ago by my circa approach -
'the west will not go down, primarily because
it is too weak for that, not because
it is still strong.'
  which is why i ask: is free speech anything
to defend these days, when free thought
echoes so many years later,
  and what is now considered "free" speech
is merely idle superstition regarding
a "revival", the last supposed push?

there's absolutely no honour in kicking
a maned dog,
                    and in that act: of kicking
a maned dog, or giving a bowlful of bones
for a toothless dog to nibble on
is just as well... might as well spoon out
the marrow and give the old hag of the west
a pâté to slurp...
        yes, orthographically speaking:
very pedantic of the french to bend the macron
into a circumflex -
sure, ain't pretty, but i can assure you:
i'll be technical;

what the west can be thankful of is that it's
the first culture in decline,
   and once a culture is in decline,
among so many others, the others follow suite -
like a spread of cancer,
or any other plague -
     it probably begins by the european
decadence in not respecting antibiotics -
  infesting themselves with superbugs -
or thereby managing to craft some sort of
immunity to them...
  and they say that ****** if baah baah baad...
big pharma never kills, does it?!

i'm still confused on a close proximity akin
to thesaurus logic of synonyms -
i.e. decline of the west = heroic optimists of the decline
        (it must surely happen!)
or is: decline of the west = pessimists on hiatus?
                  i.e. it will never happen!

ah! that's what it was: i was thinking of hiatus
but wrote hubris instead... d'uh dum dum...

  i.e. the roles have changed -
now the pessimists are engaged in hubris -
                      while the optimists are on a hiatus:
the whole - i told you so...
             the whole i told you so since the 1920s
is irrelevant these days,
   given the great america never again ended
at the beginning of the 21st century...
                    the monologue from the grand ***
degraded from the grand satan is hot puff and
cinnamon smoke...
          
       once more: what is relevant about what's
being said these days? as much as was a passing
observation in the 1920s?
          i hardly think so...
   the so-called freedom that only gravitates
to idle-chit-chat and poseur antics of bravado?

given that not much is questioned,
   and whatever is questioned has lost its allure
to be fresh, to be alarming,
   all the questions asked are plagiarisms,
a dead-end, in imagery: a library with only
one book in it (i mean, a library brimful with
books, but all these books are the same book);
which makes these times so
answer-unworthy - is that they come so
easily, and are usually borrowed from
the same anglophonic sets of ideas,
regurgitated chick food from the peckers of
their parental guardians.
            
         well, if you live in times when people
have that idiotic audacity to ask a question
like: what's the meaning of life,
  why are we here, how did we form, etc.:
   all these inessential "essence" questions -
          and about as many historicals gaps
of memory lapse as a drinking session with
oliver reed in between...
               the only question goes something
like this:
   and ? found myself walking around the house,
walking by a mirror, ? peered in,
   and without a narcissus to mind
to slowly build a curiosity that would turn
into self-love, ? exclaimed: !,
   after which ? steadied by pace of questioning
adding the much needed: ?!
                      
what's as good a questioning dynamic / schematic as
you're going to get, these days.

a conversatioon with cats is "biased" upon the focus on gesticulation, or rather: a hyper-cipher of expressing a body to encompass language, without a focus on the existence of thought: that can be allowed rain.

a gender neutrality of pronouns?!
pronouns have been "gender neutral"
last time i checked...
   in attempting to give directions:
    it is a pronoun with negative
subjective "insinuations"...
          that* also being
                               a pronoun...

   the mob rule argument:

       i'd like to "know" what
a "world" view looks like...
          given the specifics...

and some have children, and some have
mediocre language use...
        but who's to lay the brick on brick
and say: that's a castle, not
a mountain...

    i could have loved a woman
once...
          had she not thought i lied to her
and slapped me in the face...
  apparently visiting your
grandparents is taboo...
                     must be a russian thing...
and if she told you:
well i moved from st. petersburg
on the ground that he provided for me,
but i wouldn't move to the outskirts of
london that he slept on floor
while i slept in his bed as he held my
hand to imitate a lullabye

   then i too am riddled with having
to perform the lunacy of prayer,
     invent a god i might require
to invest in rekindling will...
     but still, the narcissus before the still
waters of a lake, imagining mirror,
when peering into a shadow...
  
                  schattenkind...

     an artist is fed by curiosity...
        the many may remember the many
that leave no foot...
            to be trodden on via repeat...
                 ******* Seneca deserved his
fate...
            complaining about the Tao monks
is one thing,
                  but living by stipend
of their maxim is another...

       dancing on hot coals is one thing,
petting a lion another...
       why Aesop conjured the
lion & fox chimera and not the
fox & wolf: now akin to me...

                 pronouns are generally
discriminating, anti-narrative shrapnel
of words...
                but for deity's sake:
why does the devil require a precursor
of a definite article,
   and it can "never" be cited:
                        a god?

                          i once studied the monarch,
the bishop and an orchestra conductor,
you know what i found?
    what, with a static audience?
        even with an opera singer on the fore,
the balancing edge of falling into
a sea of people?
               this clown with a prestigious
monicker?

                     as some might pet a cat like
another might play a guitar.

       can you imagine an orchestra
without a conductor,
   with a frozen audience to "provide"
a rhythm?
            i'm just starting to realise
the need for an orchestra conductor...
      imitation of rhythm...
           i've started reading
   the need for a conductor
   of an orchestra....
                               orientating
yourself using an inanimate object
to make a performance...
          requires a motivational
"tool"...
                    something wiggling
and spaghetti throwing
                      in foci:
     i.e. there's an alleviating point
     to mediate orchestra and audience...
considering the in stasis presence
             of an audience...
              
           sabina zweicker singing
        drachengeboren...

   because who would think an orchestra
conductor a homelessman?

        if he be not a motivational tool?
it would appear that there was
to be a mediator, akin to a football
judge & linear,
        to encompass an team worth
an orchestra, and an audience...
                
     oiled up ****** *****...
                                 and a sinking Venice...  
      my mediocre beginning
culminating in no works of Goya...
        a tuba player and an Etonian choir
of cherubs masked as castratos
        of some obscure Egyptian harem...
labouring a geometry of
people who's shadows do not
              morph into stones of graves...

     however many plagiarisms
of frank zimmerman...
         ah, right... hans... zimmer...
scooters on four-wheel chimps-
worth a Ferarri calling it a
Mediterranean diet's worth of canvas
blockers...
                  
        because language suddenly
had the ontological basis to bias
            play-dough in favour for
a rigid architecture of a chair?

       i won't fly with angel wings,
      but i'll certianly become flustered
with pigeon beaconc worthy of flight...
    
   and they really did overplay
    tchaikovsky in st. petersburg
when celebrating the use of a fountain...
i said to her: they're turning in their graves...
even if dead, i said to her:
  the dead find it hard to fall asleep...

they really did overplay
   tchaikovsky in st. petersburg
while crafting a water fountain
             spectre...
   with the regrettable consequences of
having under-played prokofiev...

as i find the conductor a "primitive" form
of  Cratylus:
        to have spoken deaf...
                             among the hearing;
but there's the need to mediate
    a moving body against
a canvas that does not,
                  in a forum...
                        a place of congregation,
at leat a thinker can be allowed
to be entertained
             by such a, un-fathom-ability.

Who knew our spirits would be so easily broke? Who knew our past loves would come crawling up our legs to meet us for dinner? who knew the joys of rhythm and melody would stand and stare us down for hours and never lead with the first move. Who knew the catacombs of my fearing mind would desecrate the innards of my only wantings. Who knows why the big ones reel in after dusk. Why did things turn out in the season of so much anger? How can one overcome any proportion of ill intention to an honest living. Where are the street-grit-fighting-fearless godsends of our time. Where are the nights of comfort among the towering plagiarisms of sonic inequities. Why am I stone in my own mirror? And how often shall I have to shave off the transgressive anachronisms of the jesting majority-unjust. Will I ever see a cannon with a name other than "jesus the king" around the barracks of quen anne burrows? I am cold and engrossed with my feelings. I am the youth's catch-all phrase for re-new-all and desperate tendencies. I am the unconscious objection to that censure of my own old crowning. The way i was held like an infant again. I mustered and mangled and derived that only in my free gliding could i roll down the soft hills of my fervent dreams. I can smell and sense the rays of jubilation i reach when drifting in tangent with the innocuous verbiage of my unbridled soul. Bringing the bleak toned honesty I once and always devote my sincerity towards. and alas my mind begins burrowed in the melting tin of bleeding doves. Not to be confused with other obscurities We Speak Wandering. Pleasant by night,

i just want to stay up to midnight and watch the footie...
see, already, it's there, he wannabe blind man
turning phonetics upside down
using optical symbols to sing with his eyes closed
and acting out a sloth piece of a stage's curtain call for encore,
footie can be american slang  for football: or ensure a bag of
flour explodes while i get scalped;
otherwise footie means football:
you know it's round enough to be kicked
rather than thrown for a touchdown...
never got the hang of it... n.f.l. means
as much to me as does excess of hair
on a cranium crop of expected hair with no beard,
and vice versa, loss of hair and a donned
beard for the plucked sucker of the 2nd ball drop...
baldy over here met elvis and in levis took
to a cattle stampede with aria: la la la lee lo lo he he
(mike jackson slam dunks a quack for the moon pond,
like it was n.b.a. anyway: walking on ice
the musical... now the encore... signature the
sound of applause);
so this married man is rebelling...watches football
till midnight, rebel...
watches the footie...
a. foot, i.e.
b. foot, e
c. foot eeh
d. footy
e. foo' tea
f. foo' tee
                                 now you guess the accent...
cumbrian? glaswegian?
north london or brick lane?                  which?
a, b, c d or e or f?^
           see what happens being judgemental and sober?
you get drunks doing picassos! and that's not good
not good one bit for the worth of investment in plagiarisms.
the stressor marks / diacritical marks missing in english
obviously gave us scot spelling and a welsh 1 + 1 of
a ******* longbow stylistic for the v long
before churchill... i wanted gaelic i got trainspotting spelling...
about as relevant as catcher in the rye relevant by now...
so... don't teach accent rubrics... and you'll get a heartfelt
superiority in the former colonies, while the pigeons coo:
or simply curl the famished tongues
that were silenced for man to speak in spasms
of an electrician checking the sockets for an electric depth
of the pigeons' coo into an aqualine echo of a sneeze,
if not snorkel or a gesundheit.
^*i hate how syllable splitting into compounds
show diacritical marks all too relevant, missing.

my interests in / with philosophy are grammatical,
"         "        "  /    "    theology      "   linguistic.*

as philosophy did not entice grammatical words to express it,
as philosophy did not entice grammatical words to be utilised,
so thus the study of language became distinct
from philosophy, with only english or german or italian
teachers using these words as a forgivable badge of honour,
but what if a philosopher decided to "steal" these words and use
them, what then? it would be secondary, to have learned
a language in order to progress to the second tier of language
and erase colloquial truths, idiosyncratic truths, etc.,
those maxims that never really matter, but find me one philosophy
book that deals with words rather than ideas by submerging
itself in ideas and theories not of the world, not political,
metaphysical, theological... but simply grammatical... as to why
the pronouns clash when used as the universal stipend of question:
who, how, when, what if, etc. it's a minefield of considerations,
categorisation of words to only craft learned plagiarisms
of the pulpit, that such rigidity in grammatical classification
of words is so aged ashen leaky and rickety and sir sneeringly sneaky
as to be disregarded by philosophy is a gaping black gravity vortex
of travesties. how do i write you ask, with what ease
and with what machinery of split second bullet fire (sometimes)?
i simply declassified certain words, rearranged their
grammatical classification, some permanently, some impermanently;
such is this curse of the orthodox theory of language,
this ungrammatical denotative classification,
before the sun or the moon can be a subject for a poem
or some other form of inspiration, it's firstly a subject for nouns;
oh i believe in grammar, but not how it's organised
for the sole purpose of schooling, the odd jack-in-the-box popup
lightning slosh of um um ah when the teacher labours momentarily to
utilise grammatical words to explain a bewilderment without
actually explaining anything other than the classification coupling
obvious(ness) in a poem... esp. one beginning with a conjunction such as and.

over-quoted or overlooked, but advanced into ridiculousness nonetheless, sam's the man for all things barren, but at least sam's was a time when you wrote a book and didn't have to endorse toothpaste advertisement. brand the ***** with clinical white, on the bone, on the bone, but mind you, tattoo the skin in octopi ink. now imagine it not so: little words don't belittle but also don't engross, fluid they are, fluid. so, mind you, it's not true when you say it's true that: poet gives homage to a writer, by trying little plagiarisms like this to see if some deep blue somewhere could relate twos grammar into ones and oneness binary - little wording, just a little like that, is a poet's homage to sam's stage fright. so odd they said, so odd, no matter if many ifs, buts or maybes, the kasparov accusation bloated techno techno ?, so much so that beep beep b beep made it on the dancefloor: that rigid phonetic ring with a machine of answers, also known as the churchbell tower: i believe i believe he took one maxim unto himself from nietzsche, sam the man did, he took the: believe in grammar believe in god, don't believe in grammar don't believe in god, throws god out, writes about god, with a disbelief in grammar, or a grammar of disbelief; which makes sense, given that - the sun shone, having no alt., on the nothing new - sound est so so goo.

i am tired, said the bear, everwhere hurts so dreadfully.



like the plague they copied, talked about me when

they do not even know me,

understand.



they do not know therefore what they

say…….



sbm.

note –
plagiarism
ˈpleɪdʒərɪz(ə)m/
noun
noun: plagiarism; plural noun: plagiarisms

    the practice of taking someone else’s work or ideas and passing them off as one’s own.
    “there were accusations of plagiarism”

i always thought that the Persians
were too proud of a people,
i. e. that they had,
but more importantly had a past
to wholly succumb to those
Arab camel jockeys whole heartedly,
apparent familial loyalty
and gob-serves-as-prime-precursor
had a waspish sting in it...
if an Islamic schism happened
much later,  and without such
fervor... let's face it...
Christianity is  "monotheism"
   in name only... what it hides
beneath its nuns' attire is a
pseudo-theology of either:
1... a third, two thirds
towing an imaginary third
that's either a congregation
of a *******, talking dove...
3 out of 3... a secular "polytheism"...
not so much a many gods scenario,
but many shared, "plagiarisms"...
and the odd: on the 6th and
every recurrent 6th of the month,
god took to the 7th, the sabbath,
and started gambling...
threw dice...
     played cards...
                because how much of
the orthodox jewish prohibition
becomes original thinking,
on a sabbath?
            Islam seems to be waging
a case for uniqueness,
in that... a schism was immediate,
its  schism didn't become
a polyglot garbage heap of:
hence Christianity as a "polytheism"...
or rather,  a poly-schismaticisation...
a guru here, a guru over there...
and of course,  the Persians
themselves...
              no religion can boast
such devicive schism...
but then again, the martyr Ali...
and the too painful
   personal details on th matter...
yet the immediacy of the schism,
with Muhammad's still Kentucky-fried
chicken in the grave...
   point being... pillar words...
words immune to the thesaurus juggling
act, and the decadence of
late jurisprudence...
taqiyya is immune to the thesaurus...
oddly enough, for a word
that means deception...
it is pristine... in that it serves no
ulterior purpose, other than the
blatantly given...
      a word two dimensional,
(0, 0) that becomes (1, 1)...
    as a concept , taqiyya is
immune to the thesaurus...
     because?
     taqiyya is a misconception...
esp. among westerners...
or rather... those camel jockeys
don't understand taqiyya...
as being worthy of the 5 pillar
status...
  shahada... salah...  zakāt... sawm...
taqiyaa...
    the misconception?
to deceive, in order to convert...
every muslim, notably Sunni...
implied conversion...
   upon the most frivolous of
conversation genesis...
                       after all...
taqiyaa is a sh'ia concept,
not sunni... to practice taqiyaa
you do not subvert your own religion
in order to gain converts...
            why would you practice
taqiyaa, in order to convert,
rather than practice taqiyaa,
in order to defend?
         inverting taqiyaa is what
sunni camel jockeys do...
conversion by taqiyaa...
or rather, the taqiyaa shahada...
because you side with the first
and most pristine schism...
rather than a religion....
catholicism became protestantism...
sunni and orthodox zombies...
mind you:
is there any difference
between the Arab oil barons
and the Russian oligarchs?
     depends on a girls name...
and whether sheikh h'ahmed
or Igor of Novosybirsk can conjure
up... a ******* unicorn...
no wonder the Persians took
to a grudge: the word of the Koran
is one thing, but the hadith another...
ali? I'm no Dante... a supreme martyr...
word of the prophet broke false,
on a simple familial test
of loyalty... which is a bit like...
that dandy warhol's song
muhammad...
             Sunni Islam is too dump
to appreciate a sixth pillar,
that of sh'ia Islam...
            just look at how proud
the Greeks are in modern affairs...
******* won't lift a finger!
well... no wonder...
since no Byzantine is cited,
i too would be *******...
        taqiyaa is a defence mechanism,
as if protecting the Afghani
Sufi teachings that nibbled
on 'indu...
      taqiyaa has only one
thesaurus weaknees...
hijab... niqab...
            camel jockey sunni
Islam knows only taqiyaa as:
collateral damage via conversion...
soda fizz to the head...
                oh... right... the current 7th...
jihad...
               and the beast of revelation...
that hydra...
   blah blah blah...
transcendental taqiyaa:
Malcolm X...
                        or rather:
Christianity spread its legs open,
and smiled...
   counter?
last time I checked,
the mother of Islam was
Abraham's concubine...
  as far as the pristine mothers of
a son's will goes...
bogged down to personal choice...
and never,  a personal god...
but an impersonal one...
let the actors take the stage
and eat a loaf of bread....
i'll gladly settle for the crumbs...
observe the confines,
and orchestrate the schattenmärz...
if not now,  then never,
to reiterate:
                    taqiyaa is
the 6th pillar of Islam,
used as a defence tactic,
rather than as a rhetoric of conversion...
sunni Islam understands
as much Farsi, as I understand
Ching-Mung-Choo...
    much, much later...
comes: and what of the Jihad
in the Balkans? **** scared of the Serbs?!
**** me, having myself to
reiterate their ****** rubric.

it's sometimes hard not to make these incisions into
the observably miniscule disparages -
how one complains of not enough,
and how the other complains of: all too much...
take my amusement of simon sebag montefiore's
article in the sunday times news review
about the unearthing of israel...
     all this talk of mongolian ***** hordes of
nostalgic historical reconquista always gets
me hot & bothered...
  the fact that israel was non-existent for so
long, seems to be due to the perfected
integration tact of the jews on foreign soils -
how they perfected the art...
      with such perfect integrational tactic:
you'd think they'd never leave these northern
lands, only upon the promise,
that one gentile might study kabbalah:
and actually get someone out of it, genuinely,
and not ****** the next sentence of:
inc. blood libel & christ killer, etc.
    i have concern for the natives here,
what sort of dog-food of history have they been
fed, it almost seems that the english have
a history, by populist demand,
as a "genesis" in the 1960s, and ending in
britpop!
         but as an exile, i can compensate the natives
in that: as an "exile", i can see an exiled population
when i see one,
and the english are exiles on their home turf...
as i am an exile, when i return back home,
to the child that left the land aged 8...
every time i go back, my grandparents are
getting older, while i'm growing more distant,
and even the only tentacle that attaches me
to the land is there, i rarely use it,
unless it rapes my psyche back into native
sprechen; as a slav that speaks better germanic
than slavic, i find myself like the atypical
conundrum of those of mixed-race:
mate, i'm a psyche-mongrel, go plead
for soppy violin music on another street-corner...
whatever it is that traps you on the
organic barricade of colonial piracy,
at least that's celebrated: bilingualism?
that's that's schizophrenia to these monochromatic
moguls...
       *******... next time you mention
napoleon mention what he said about:
a man of two tongues is worth two men,
a man of a single tongue,
   is worth half a man, and a single nation;
well, he didn't exactly say the last bit,
i just added the play on arithmetic.
         but i watch the english with a certain
bombastic sense of pity...
  there is a much bigger craving for pity
as the broker of power than the christian
"sense" of "forgiveness" - pity mocks,
forgiveness is a *****...
                but it always dawns upon me -
that mystical strip of land,
   the sudden disappearance of poland &
lithuania was / has / and never will be so
entrenched in a biblical mythology as israel,
which is why it ends up being a jack-in-a-box
surprise... the volatility of its re-emergence
always seems "odd"...
      but i am nonetheless a mongrel of the psyche,
even though i can claim biological pedigree,
with an extension into a czech sounding
surname (batuk instead of batóg) -
bohemian written all over it...
and we know that only the ugly vikings
made up the settlement of kiev...
    ugly men, beautiful women -
                      that's evolution for you...
ah, right, the beauties of the walrus harems of
kiev...
         what are they calling her?
edna, ophelia?
     i've never seen the sky as sepia tinged as i have
just now...
and sure, they once called jerusalem
the golden citadel, and london a marsh...
         but i still find the resurrection of poland
more spectacular than the resurrection
of israel, in that there is: so much less controversy!
i almost forget that, if i were born at
another time: i wouldn't be writing this...
      but then again, the point being:
the people who momentarily "disappeared"
were never of a nomadic stock...
          maybe that's why there's a controversy,
establishing a nation for nomads,
who, after being dole sheep marching into
the abyss, are not so keen to march back
into the israel they have dubbed a second auschwitz?
the nomadic distrust is behind the controversy
of establishing a nation-state, a fixed
geographic region,
that does not actually succeed in a tactic
of a nation-state model persuasion...
           i'd imagine less controversy regarding
this nation-state, had the nation-state actually
managed to persuade reuben, simeon, levi,
judah, dan, naphtali, gad, asher, issachar,
zebulun, joseph & benjamin...
what a pointless sets of plagiarisms -
the new testament is the anti-semitic statement of
the greeks, their superiority complex reaches
the high heavens and the depths of the most
sulphur stinking depths of lies...
   jacob's dozen vs. jesus' dozen...
           you have to be ******* kidding me!
not with the 1945 archeological unearthing!
    where was it? the dead sea?
no, some ******* egyptian farmer in an egyptian
desert, in a cave, and lo & behold
the nag hammadi script...
                  looks like doubting thomas can
longer be a mere poke at the wound in
caravaggio...
                          and was not the plagiarism rushed
in the years 37 through to 68 AD in the reign
of nero, given that the first book written
of the new testament, was the book of revelation?
taking the ******* **** out of
the concept of the tetragrammaton with
the four gospels...
     well, as names of letters go,
   the prefix list too...
                 hellenic and hebraì...
(l)adies first -
   a(lpha), b(eta) etc.
        θא‎φע‎θע‎φא -
      when T(et) met T(sadi) which met T(av) -
when H(e) met H(et) -
                        when S(amekh) met S(hin) -
     so when jerusalem was a beacon of gold -
and london was but a marsh,
the marsh peoples managed to make clear
prefix cut-offs, have names for their letters,
and only make the faux pas akin to the hebraì,
                   in greek to oωθφεη -
but never unto three...
   the trinity of the transcending aesthetics of
orthography - upon the crucifix:
       ט‎ (tet), צ‎ (tsadi) & ת‎ (tav) -
  with its hands out-stretched:
  from the east of ח‎ (het), to the west of ה (h'eh);
sigma in greek does not equate the transgression
of the hebraì T -
                   due to capital.

Losing oneself into the breeze was wondrous,
Faulting someone else was slanderous,
Motioning to infinity without wings was flops,
I knew it's a moreover repetitious,
But for sure its own consciousness,
Not calligraphy of plagiarisms,
But that of blusterous
Like the great Helios.

.come to think of it, there's that other album i loved learning on the guitar, notably for the song: show me how to live... audioslave - self-titled album... could play most of the songs... i once played with a drummer, a swiss exchange student, who was in a band back in switzerland... tobias... otherwise? a pretty ****** affair playing an electric guitar all by yourself, unless you're making haunting solo-interchanges-with-rhythm akin to ol' cobain, shackled in his sociopathic house with leeches for roommates... but there was something else... what was it? what, was it? ah... prompts... nothing beats reading some heidegger or looking at the qabbalah version of hebrew... to stir the mind into itchy fingertips... two drinks down and i'm geared up... how many nicknames i have for my cats? too many... the female cat i sometimes call tyson fury, by the way she tries to conceal either her no. 1 or her no. 2 in the "cuvette" (yes, that is, a misnomer, but i like the word, so i used it... in that place where cats do their no. 1 & no. 2 with all the "raisins" to cover their seemingly irritable sense of "sin")... the male maine ****? big *******, almost 10kg, big as a fox... his nickname? bodzio... since he always appreciates a head-**** as a greeting, sticks his head out and: ****... heads meet... i also call him the: choir boy... i've never heard a cat make so much ****** noise... i stopped counting the number of meow variations he can usher out... fine during the day, at 4am? not so great; well... if animals don't have a soul, or rather: they have impure souls... i'm pretty sure they have a **** distinct record for character... people? eh... you rarely meet people with character, sure, they have personalities, cats don't have personalities: except one... a cat personality... but cats are more likely to have a character than any known man, since there's no chance for them to grasp a personality... the female ****? soames (forsyte)... such an anti-social cat, pick her up she complains... zołza... i almost miss owning a dog, dogs are fun when you're young... but at least with cats... you can just ignore them: you do your ****, they do their ****: everyone's happy... as an only child i liked a sycophant on a leash... but as i grew older... cats: because i can ignore them, the most natural solipsists... and mind you... what is solipsism if not a superior version of atheism? current trend of youtube cencorship (no point boasting about viewcounts of subscribers, but at least reading imposes the high-jump filter, any idiot can watch a video, spurred with ill-will in the comment section, report etc., much harder to pursue censorship when: you have to read something, rather than passively watch a video)... ****... they reduced the "suggested" feed to only 12 videos per video... so much for finding glitches and new bands, back to the tedium of using last.fm... as i once watched a h'american give a talk in a conference: solipsism is a mental illness... my my... why are the h'americans toying with psychiatry? at least i'm not chemo-phobic... i'll pop a psychiatric pill over a whiskey... i'm currently using an anti inflammatory as a sleeping pill... naproxen... solipsism, is a mental illness? seriously? something that can't exactly be put into practice, like catholicism? wow... i always thought that solipsism was a tier above atheism... atheism bores me... it's the sort of boredom that a psychopath serial killer would associate with existence per se... boredom... and even then... the thrill of the **** is also tied to: missing... of course christianity spread so easily in the roman empire, given the obvious plagiarism of the greek gods... no other plagiarism in existence is so obvious, elsewhere? similarities, but not plagiarisms... a fresh god appears, of course he would appeal... how else would ha-shem conquer if not from a position of weakness? everyone still remembers Zeus, a father figure, venerates him, and all the others, in poetry at least... Odin still remains, another father figure... the runes are still here... but ha-shem will never be a father figure for me... it's impossible to arrive at that conclusion... no father figures in monotheism, even islam forbids it... sure... in polytheism, feasible... but in monotheism? it's no more a he, or a she, for that matter, an it... a h. p. lovecraft nightmare conjuring... and if this is infantile thinking, if all of this is a "delusion"... i've seen worse, i've heard of worse... and as such: there's no comfort in such a thought process... more... some extra spice to add to the curiosity that reigns in me over furthering my linguistic perusing adventure.

playing with my
           maine **** male
quorus,
   cat...
while gulping down
   root parsnip
with some raw turkey meat...
and then came the dream,
of falling asleep.
root parsnip
and raw turkey meat...
it almost makes
baltic sushi seem
like a luxury
         with the herrings!

all the while...
drenching my face with cold,
cold, tap water,
cusp of hands...
hereby: drop your pennies
for best wishes...
pretending to sober up;
sober this.

I notice your
subtle plagiarisms

it could be a word I used once

or my angels leap from
my head onto your paper

you'll change the name of 'angel'
to "you",
meaning "I"

it's never too obvious

but I see my influence
I see my thievery mimicked beautifully

i remember this one outing i had with "friends"
from high school, we used to go to the cinema
get some food at Frankie & Bennies...
this one particular time everyone was ordering
a steak and chips and what-not...

everyone was making the order: well-done... please!
oh god... i couldn't stand it!
why would you butcher a fine cut of beef: twice!
why?! why?!
there's a ****** good reason why you don't
butcher beef twice...
might as well asked for minced beef: some *******
spaghetti Bolognaise or a ******* burger!
cut-off ****(e)... dog food! hundessen!
might as well asked for some roast beef:
but that's doubly butchering the meat!

there's a reason you order undercooked beef...
the same reason why you have a steak tartar...
there's a reason...
   frankly?! i'm not surprised the Hindus do not eat
beef... it's not some ******* allegory of:
the cow gives us milk... it's our mother...
well... the goat gives milk too...
no... the Hindus... i find... stopped eating beef
because: for all their alchemical wonders of
their Raj-spice-kingdom:
they couldn't master a way to eat beef: proper...

****... my chin's itching...
i haven't brushed my beard today...
although i brushed my teeth...
need to get rid of this itch....

.....................................
.................­....................
......................................

ah... that's better... just wetted it...
it's easier to have wet ***** on your face
that you're about to comb than it is to have
dry ***** about to get pulled put by each
stroke of the comb...

but they ordered a well-done steak...
you don't eat a steak "well-done": like you don't
eat cooked herrings
or cooked sushi...
                some things are supposed to be eaten
raw or at least semi-, raw...
the meat is more tender when partially cooked...
you can't! can't! can't!
eat an overcooked piece of beef!
there's no such thing as a well-done steak:
there's only trash!
            that's called doing the double-butchers'...

steak bleu... or rare... or medium rare...
depending on the "girth" of the platter...
i'd say... respectively:
well seasoned either side... sea salt... not your
conventional crap... pepper?
in the pestle and mortar... not the pre-ground stuff...
bleu? 20 seconds either side...
rare? 35 seconds either side...
medium rare? fluctuating change of temp.
and about a minute either side...
  
i respect what i eat...
at that gathering... my "friends" looked at me
oddly... he's eating rare beef...
and what the rest of you ******* are having
roast ******* dinner
and a tapeworm phobia?!
like you can't eat cooked herrings:
the biggest tapeworms known to man
are bound to sleep in aquatic creatures...
that's not going to stop me from enjoying
my Baltic sushi... dill... gherkins... creamy sauce...
mmm...

   i've become sort of lactose intolerant...
well... as much as i love milk...
   i need it to be doubly filtered... or whatever the hell
they do with it that makes it drinkable for me:
i'm not a massive fan of yoghurts...

doubly butchering a cow by cooking it
well-done... what barbarians!
esp. a steak: now... i can be very pretentious
when it comes to food...
obviously! i don't want to be eating
******* oat-meal that's reserved for cattle
when i could be cherishing a cherry!
it's that simple!

mind "you": i woke up today and thought...
hmm... so the gods came to a standstill...
i know the Hebrew deity is a deity eater...
former gods of the other Semites soon became
angels: fallen angels...
the fallen gods of the people and their alphabets
(phonetic encoding practices)
became eroded... Cuneiform... dead...
the Egyptian Hieroglyphics: dead...
      let's face it... the latter?
hardly practical... even though...
it took the time to ***** the Eiffel Tower
to overshadow the Giza Pyramids...
       the Roman use of letters as a concept for numbers...
that's pretty ******* genius...
VI + IV = X... come on... the numbers were
already hidden in the letters...
    b + G = X (6 + 4 = 10) -
                
                what's 0? a squashed version of O
-micron...
   can you draw a 3D version of a circle on paper?
a pyramid and a cube is simple...
hmm... Islam has a powerful fascination
with the cube... while Christianity stresses
the triangle...
            you could like you could insinuate:
the eight standing and eight reclining
               8                                  ∞

bb, bb... bbbb... (BBBB)...

            but the gods apparently came to an agreement...
the Latin script would flourish...
the Latin gods? eh... they were already
the plagiarisms of the Greek gods...
but the planets would be given the names
of the Latin gods... not the Greek gods...
scientific constants would be given to the Greeks...
because the Latins "forgot" to give noun status
to their letters... like ah: is not alpha... etc.

but... ha! the Slavic gods would disappear...
completely... no questions asked...
personally?
as long as the Norse gods remained intact...
the Glagolitic script: precursor of the Cyrillic has...
job done... the runes also have remained...
and why? why did the Hebrew deity have such a hard
time... undermining both the phonetic encoding method
of the Greeks and the Latins...
weakness... the jealous one:
even as he tried to march forward with his most
precious son being sacrificed...
Lucy... the hey-zeus... dangling on a crucifix...
couldn't: wouldn't: can't! undermine
something elder: as much original and as much
true as himself...

i sometimes pity him: mr. ******* bombastic...
i'd love to see him... unravel the x-ray scribbles
of the Dao-menschen... of the Mandarins...
with his: futile 'ebrew!
               really? he can?!
personally...
i have three favourites...

i'm usually disguised as a doppelganger...
i'm usually some famous rugby player
or Brad Pitt...
              i have a headache: thanks but...
eh... i also want to think about al dente pasta...
shadow-thief?! visage-thief...
whatever the correct term...
  
   i'm more inclined toward the gods
of technique...
             i don't like the sensibility of nothingness...
the sober: persistent: ping-pong
with nothing whereby you... hit a ball and...
oops! no echo... the ball doesn't come back...
the relationship with nothing is unlike
a relationship with deities...
nothing is a glutton...
                  you can't play squash with nothing...
there's no echo within the confines of believing:
all of this came from nothing...
nothing...
                      nothing...
      i don't buy the 00s atheistic popular crap...
because? no dinosaurs in the book of Genesis?!
literal reading? right...
so... no dragon on the flag of Wales?!
   no great: fire-breathing lizards?!
             crocodiles?! where?!
                     people weren't reading poetry back when
there was a potato famine! were they?!

the, language, is, *******, poetic! by poetry it implies:
metaphor subsequently: mythology...
what?! expect ******* journalism from the year 500 B.C.?!
******* gullible people...
like we all want a libido / a journalistic insomnia
of always wanting to have a ******* / being informed
about... **** all there is to be known!

fair enough: the Hebrew deity once duped
the white northerners to adopt his ****** sacrifice
of a "son" as salvation: as instigator for war
upon war upon war...
      now?! he's currently panicking...
oh ****... these same people have become somewhat
sensible: it no longer matters with the resurrection
of the state of Israel...
time to... turn "one's" attention toward Africa!
yes! ******* brigade moves on!
eh... and some remnants of it still persisting in
H'america... but what's new?!

- must have woken up dreaming about deities...
i must have...
who are my two favourites?!
the architects... the technicians...
in Greek: Hephaestus...
   in Norse? Höðr... or Brokkr...

the unifying concept of monotheism that runs
parallel with the globalist agenda...
any: every idiot can spot this...

but i felt wondering...
am i, ambidextrous?
         i don't think i am...
           i closed one of my eyes...
i'm right-handed...
which eye do you think i closed: to keep balance?
my right eye, or my left eye?!
Odin: dearest provider of puzzles...
hangman Judas and taboo breaker...
since i'm right handed when i write:
although: the genius of QWERTY implies
that i'm somehow ambidextrous
when facing a typewriter...
i... i closed my right eye...
ah... balance!
                if i were to script an imitation...
take my right eye...
i'm left-eyed...
  i see better with my left eye...
i close my right eye...
my right hand... superior:
    ius-manus-superior...
how is that grammatical, correct?!
superior-manus-iua?!
right hand superior...
                  esp. with an eye missing...
i can thereby stroke shadow dogs...
shadow dogs: figments of my imagination...
i can touch the "lips" of death...
              i'm right-handed therefore
my left eye is both a telescope and a microscope
envy... while by supposedly missing right
eye: is my arm...
and with it... i yield: all the clues concerning
mastering "nothing"...

my current "god"?! the diacritical markers
in Cyrillic...
notably... like that represented: Cyclops
eye of Dajjal in the triangle...
i have a letter... well... "letter"...

                         Щ... perhaps smaller might help:
щ...
                i'm pretty sure diacritical markers will
help... because? what i am revealing?!
the tetragrammaton: the H1: laughter generator...
and the H2: the vowel catcher...
ha ha... contrast with ah... ah... eh?!

point being...
   Щ = ŠČ
                        what's that?
two hidden S'es... or Zeds... schcheka: it: (the dog)
barks... not... no no... not: the dog is barking...
the dog: barks!
that's two rugby goalposts of H hidden in diacritical
markers... or... if you were to employ the Cyrillic...
a little accent on the huSH (ш) with the "comma"
being added to exfoliated the CHatter...

this is my anti-Hebrew sentiment with regards
to lettering...
oh... the Greeks and the Hebrews have been
bedfellows for all these years...
trying to complicate their language with
a technicality that only Down Syndrome sufferers are
able to read...
not on my watch...
    
you're not bringing this alphabet down...
however much you wish you could...
even sending this horde of Muslim impotent ****-wits
of frustrations... it's not going to work...
i'm going to be the gate-keeper to this
phonetic encoding...
like... haven't you heard?!
the internet was born from these letters?!
it wasn't... born from Katakana...
Hanguel or Mandarin ideograms...
or spaghetti Mr. Dubai pants of Arabic...
****-wits... what?! meow meow:
dog took a ****... bark bark: a cat took a ****?!

am i "right-eyed!? i never thought it ut...
well... if i'm a proponent of the the right
hand... when writing... although...
give me a keyboard: both hands are used...
i kick a pebble down the road using my right foot...
i must be more inclined to prefer my
left eye...
            
the Hebrews can salvage their ****-hurt belief
in undermining the Gentiles
with having sacrificed "their" son of "god":
retaliating with a planned invasion
from the Muslim tribe...
honestly? these women are worth being
sacrificed... they're not my mothers,
they're not my sisters...

if "Europe" is to be ***** by another
Mongol invasion... look at me?! am i worried?!
i know i'm dealing with mollusk Arabs
with as much stamina and
grit as...
don't ask... they are probably going to get
their fluffy toys of makeshift puppy pretend
it'sa dog... it doesn't ****, it doesn't ****...
there's no worse curse than wearing black...
dealing with pet fur...

i do think about...
"think"...
about... allowing myself...
eyelashes... to be substituted for.... a  concern
for a lack of shoelaces...
i do "think" that i want to walk
in shoes... i want to echo to scream!
echo: foot-notes!

spuckefreuer!
                   blutenwasser!
faltenwurf-die-erde!

der berg: steht...
         der ozean: welle auf welle,,,
stein auf stein...

          etwas besser deutsche-mensch....
imaginär: drachen...
                                     zungenschlag....
und: zephyr.

yeah, rings a bell...
   i vaguely remember doing this...
no: i adamantly remember
doing this...
2nd year at Edinburgh,
having failed a 1st year
extra curriculum class
in French, after losing my virginity
to Isabella,
the 3rd year foreign exchange
student from Grenoble...
majored in psychology...
2nd year, taking a class in social
studies or some *******...
we were given a task of
writing an essay, rather than
sitting an exam...
        forget what it was...
subject matter...
         we were told that plagiarism
A.I. was in place,
that would "reread" our
efforts and find out
which work was plagiarized,
and which wasn't...
well... ahem...
     i didn't get a 1st (70%+)
score on the essay by
investing in originality...
i was too busy scouting last.fm
for new music...
           i cheated... yeah...
i cheated an A.I. system that
was, supposed to,
   pluck out plagiarisms...
  **** just didn't work...
wrote past its parameters...
  apparently an A.I. system that
makes plagiarism distinctions
wasn't as effective
when it came to someone
heavily emphasizing the use
of a thesaurus...
it's not like ctrl + c / ctrl + p
the whole essay...
       but i wasn't exactly writing
an essay:
i, wanted, to be, caught...
          i wasn't... which is the real
shame...
   i really did plagiarize
what allowed me a 1st marking...
and it wasn't even my own work...
i just churned it through
a thesaurus,
along with other minor techniques...
what came out was...
   yeah... that whole
anti-plagiarism A.I. system?
   not exactly effective...              oops?

perhaps this radio station doesn't play
the up-coming indie sensation,
die neusache...
    100.9FM... Kielce...
       and even i thought that a radio
station that only played classical music
in Poland was hard to find,
but of course i found PR2 (Dwójka)
at ~60FM...
              but back to 100.9FM...
   past 11 o'clock, through to 6 in the morning,
unadulterated musical continuum,
no adverts, just song after song...
perfected twinned to:
falling asleep wearing headphones...
somehow...
   no ticking clock, no barking dog,
no vacuum of wonder can settle a calm,
than this... perpetuated pulverisation
of sound...
   am i a millenial?
   hard to grasp the idea, listening
to the critique of those
starzy młodzi aged nearing 40...
the young who are the old...
even pensioners do not have such
a scolding beer jerky as the generation  
just prior to me hitting 18 in the year
2004...
          the young who are the old,
2 months time spent with pensioners
and suddenly the world is much
smaller, less bothersome,
    less: or rather more,
       akin to my appeal 20th regards
to the grand scheme of things,
summarised as vaguely as contested
in the word: r e a l i t y...
      vague ******* concept if you ask
me... FAMA radio... a constant stream
of music,  no adverts from
11 o'clock till 6 in the morning...
    even pensioners have enough
intelligence to not get into
generational warring...
   mind you, Chopin and Liszt are
all technique, an very little style...
diabolical indeed, technically worthy
of all those plagiarisms of reading score
and giving life, to a deaf man's gamble
off a page, trained monkeys, basically...
like the carpenter and
like the plumber... albeit with
more nuance of a useful trade...
   playing the piano is hardly a practicality
matter... unless, lounging,
bored, finding avenues to escape
popping balloons or eating Antoinette
cakes...
               all technique,
          but take for example style...
no one can tell me that there isn't
a whiff of Satie's Gymnopédie
                      in Thomas Newman's
amrican beauty soundtrack...
     i hear it as rarely pairing the two
as i cherish the scent of cherry blossom
in a spring night...
            or rather wine-cherry,
not the sweet kin'dt, but the sour genus...
which, via scent, is much sweeter
than the fruit...
           roses are without scent,
a gas explosion in an apartment...
   while violets are not worth the cliché couplet...
    for some reason,
the piano fell into the hands of
the French...
                   again, notably Debussy...
style, over technique...
                       i dwarf,  
                           a poem in hand
beneath an arch of concrete and zooming
traffic, i with a hyenna grin
and a coyote eye...
                                 come before the strawberry
picker, before the truck driver,
a punching bag of sorts...
              a "life" lived,
with only an investment in
    a life post scriptum
or rather posthumously...
          humour has it...
     the dead body speaks an alien
tongue of autopsy...
       dead yet alive...
                       alive yet dead...
          nature abhors vacuum,
so much so that god, as vacuum,
became naturue's plea
for man's possession of thought...
    deus est res vanum
  ergo **** est res cogitans...
so much thought by deity consumed
that man to retract
    his anathema for prayer
with the Enlightenment...
    lo, behold, a natural void...
of a dead, star, dead, yet not dead,
as a black hole...
                 i see fear in man
awaiting no luck in gamble on
death the first and last escape...
   take away the hour, the minute,
month year and leave but 1,
smooth transition, most notably
in the tupsy turvy spring and autumn,
away from mundane summer
and winter...
                love is a ***** of a word,
god as something too vague
and misnomer-prone...
             third thesaurus category...
synonym, antonym, misnomer (of)...
       politiksprechen,
jurisprudence outside of theory...
         it's still style over technique...
neither Chopin nor Liszt will ever
be adapted or translated into image...
breadth of fire, swirl of tornado,
diabolically elemental...
                      but the slow tortoise
foreplay of the French,
guillotine suspence...
             and then unlike some
mad woodpeckers smashing key
upon key...
              gently gliding to a ballerina
pose minus twirl,
akin to a falling oak leaf...
                         fear of the unknown
clung to death,
   or the fear of the known,
clinging to the abyss of history
                     and: no coliseum
or a pyramid of Giza to one's name?
            with no a priori
of this world at birth,
there cannot be an a posteriori
          of this world at death...
                  death will forever be, to me,
the unlearning of, falling asleep.

we did it in the bath, we did it before a mirror... i guess we only didn't do it outdoors - only because... a swan at Loch Lomond turned us off...

that these have to be little autobiographical
sketches: for starters...

a life of no real consequence:
if i were magically thrown back in time
and allowed to bring
with me a book of plagiarisms
i.e. - so that i might be ascribed
the penmanship of a Descartes... etc.

i think i'd still only (bring): avec et seul moi...
i sometimes wish i bothered
to learn Fwench...
since Italian and Spanish were
never too much appealing to begin
with... only the deutschezunge could
have harrowed me more for
an impetus to learn...

acquisition of English was what it was...
thrown into the deep end...
learn the language, ******... or sink...
some prior knowledge via
cartoon network...
but not enough to have to remember...
the "joke" on my way
to the local swimming pool...
how puma: wasn't 'poo-mah'
but somehow 'pew-mah'...
****'s sake... if i wrote down phonetically
how i said something "wrong"...
the it would look like: pjuma...

i can't escape some escapades of life
so daft that i do remember me,
Peter Richardson, Kieran O'Mahoney
and what Ilford & South Park were like
come Saturday's afternoons...
like... having to hold your breath
when walking in between
the "batty man's legs"...
a road sign with two stilts...

most people don't have the energy to
write about such trivial matters...
i'm holding back a few details with
regards to Peter and Kieran...
as you do: for the cinema of memory
has served me well and enough: truly...
the time South Park closed and we were
rummaging in it after hours
like dwarfs of sort
and had to climb over the fence...
Kieran being overweight...
me and Peter managed as i remember
my youth was spent climbing trees...
but Kieran of course had to
mistime jumping over the fence
and managed to almost impale himself
on the fence... lucky for him it was by his
underwear...

truly life is too sweet to write about
such things...
best reserved for memory:
the cinema -esqueness of the project...
  
- i like the clarity presented after
the most timid resort to exercise...
making a journey that would otherwise
take 30 minutes +
via walking for a bottle of whiskey
in a peacock's tail sort of... enterprise
of running, walking fast...
gurgling excess phlegm... spitting it out...
harking aback... almost barking...

i abhor running... a pointless task...
no wonder i started to yawn
from walking... the initial project
dealt with... from circa 120kg down to 104kg
in under circa 3 months...
no more weight loss...
something more was required to push
the weight down to under 100kg...
so i could... remember how it felt
to walk down the road and
have eyes of the opposite ***
insinuate: fuckable...
i wouldn't really demand the 3-dimensional
version of the other traits
that come, necessarily with the load:

a life that's nothing more than
time loaned...
  once i spent ~£400 in a brothel...
     over 3 hours having asked a bank manager
for an increase in my overdraft limit...
faking a funeral... extra expenses: no one died...
so much so that at one point
i was asked whether or not i'd like
a ******* because i already exhausted
three... and maybe ******* twice:
but you never know when
you pull back your *******
and the "helmet" is purple-gleeful
like a bishops' parade blah blah
because that's all that love isn't
which is no bees, no butterflies...
just oysters, flowers... bourbon... octopus /
Hindu deities...
- and to think... the day my libido dies
and the day it dies and it wasn't...
mummified in something monogamous...
it wasn't trialled...
best of all... jazz hands...
executed by an imitation 'gina
       ever since one side: that did all the *******
would bellow: oh no... the women don't...
deer in headlights...
well if it is all "there" but there's no...
outlet...

- 3 to 7 working days for the delivery
of a...
    Trek Marlin 5 hardtail...
       and i guess i don't want to sleep because...
exciting thoughts...
a clarity of placing the body
on the rack of exertion...
or rather a change in perspective...
the distance covered via walking...
a marathon in under 7 hours...
from somewhere in the vicinity of
the greater london outstretch nibbling at Essex...
toward St. Paul's cathedral... and back...
but done... from the perspective of a bicycle...
or from said starter coordinates
toward Epping...

no point keeping this imagination timid...
a thought concerning...
Canvey Island... apparently anything on
a bicycle is... doable...
most certainly... yes... doubly doable...
the image strikes me
from the perspective of walking...
the great involvement of the dimension
of speed... which... in all honesty...
doesn't exist within the confines
of walking... unless of course days turn
into weeks and weeks into months
but man, not this man...
has that many allowances for leisure
of that sort...

some impeding "doom": or rather...
a trial of the wait per se...
even though: no clue as to why i'd wait
for the otherwise inevitable...

conversations in the night:
protection via the sphinxes...
toothless head turned into bull horns
chisel, ram, chisel...
that bonsai tigers have pupils
that have serpentine qualities...

oh to own a bicycle...
is almost like having authority of wind...
and all the flutes of the world...
my self-propelled mechanisation
of horse...
i sometimes wonder whether or not
horses are as friendly as people say they
are... after all...
a cat's bite or scratch is mostly self-invoked...
and thoroughly mea culpa proof...
but being thrown off
a horse's hind into a wheelchair...

paraplegic or whatever...
how friendly, how anything...
more care bound to befriending acorns...
clots of cloud... vinyl mistaken for
liquorice...
the whole shindig bedazzle frothing
at the mouth coup...

but a bicycle is remedy...
i can fathom it more than i'd ever want
to find use for a car...
perhaps a motorbike and all the zest of Zen...
but then from: wriggle worm
into a galloping gazelle
i'm a man that apparently walked...
will now have a second spine...
a variable of prosthetic extension
with no ghost limbs to mind...

well ******* on a whim wasn't readily available...
however much i tried not being
this: son of a mother
but in the grand scheme of things...
a detail of what's otherwise an abortion...
roulette femme...
by chance, by thieving...
by ******, alone...
by a butting in by some marker of solipsism...
by not appreciating anything
from orators akin to Seneca or Cicero...

one glorious **** and then i was out...
like a colt armed (with a) sharpshooter...
circa the months when i was 21...
****... now i'm coming to 35
and life... is still a stampede away
from Pompeii...
wasted or rather stalled...
i'm reaching into the depth
of shadow to find both dog and leash...
and all the other ***** toys...

****** and bicycles...
now it becomes self-evident... only now...
wish upon a star of lefty liberalism:
how does that comatose
spew of strict linear vocab-ulary go...
how everything is authentic... clarity prone...
locally sourced: teeming with
angel dust but never, at any posit of
required introspection... burdened by leeches
or mosquitos of the Christ metaphor
of slurping a bloodied loaf of: bwa...
of bread...

o.k. for now... marriage of oops
and bootlicking flukes...
dirt cradle and a hinterland of a hinterland...
hope for not having fake a day:
i.e. earned that deserving pause
of sleep: no dreams please... no dreams...
too many faces prop themselves up in
the juxtaposition of clouds
come the serenities of the night
that dreams... once cryptic...
by some standards of those who claim
to have found a new-architecture within them...

best without them...
        i would abhor waking up riddled...
i'll find something greying in obsolete come 4pm...
just after the children have made their route
sublime for an ease of breath...
from the school
of a posteriori and into the labyrinth
of a priori of home...
of inheritance "tax"...
              
yes... then and a somewhat stressed "now".

poetry to write: disguising the availability of **** like there's the availability of music: under the scrutiny of Nietzsche i don't know which is the worst O.D.: with all the **** and Genghis Khan... but all all the music: and? well?! GOD... twice over! the secret taboo! stressing about **** and the ambitions of Genghis Khan... accomplished: clap clap: applause! maybe a sobering moment... one every two years and two more years then four when the Olympics happens and men and their four years apart and women and their four seasons and the Zodiac months not January, February i mean: Pisces Ares Taurus.... that's my mother my father and me... wookie spooky blah... if she's Christian veneer and i know she's desperately individualistic and Christianity is religion is not faith is: either ******* stupid or SPECIAL or that other "special" of *******... QUALITY ASSURANCE: bad **** from "Cali"... tested positive metal in: enzyme: tobacco: addicted to tobacco: organic subjectivity post-objective: telegraphic recount... the subjectivity of alcohol and marijuana: is... the objectivity i associate with ******, *******... ****** is... mantra: lost in books: empathy route: but still objectively distant: not familiar: like the subjectivity: piquant: tested: testing: of alcohol and marijuana: can tell apart a resin from a leaf strain and what is bad addiction: needed to test theory by refraining from *******: until the day finished: said: hard for Hercules to go mad twice: going mad once and then re-calibrating... suspect the existence of bridge: suspend: what is GRAVITY SQUARED if there's an equation for the SPEED of LIGHT SQUARED? what is gravity cubism? i swear gravity is directionless: there's no... dimension for gravity: perhaps gravity is shortscript for time?

some variation of or rather on:
"racial" relations...
so my **** dealer pulls up
and i'm trying to spot the Toyota
can't see it
but i do see one but then an Asian
ninja comes out with a child
and i'm like: something's shifting...
a minute later
a Mercedes Benz: no... not canned
Heinz beans pulls up
i jump in and gravitate to the complimentary
side of me: well good for you,
good for you...

...........................................
.............­..............................

was that an ant or a spider
itching at me from neck
then hiding in my hair and sleeping:
seems an alien life
symbiosis:
like with tree to boat to table
to chair:
couldn't much with mountains
couldn't do much with deserts
but at least i crafted: "i": crafted
glass from sand
maybe this is my poetry coming
to terms with:

those intellectual hard-ons
no women necessary:
with  ΛCDM

A and V

                smoking a different strain:
not Sherbet from California:
sorry that **** is resin like almost hashish
compact:

SZCZESCIE... at first: now let me
attire the word: happiness-fortune
with the proper judgement of a king's
reunited to shirt
and trousers:
believe me the king is not naked:
either the tyrannical father
and the liberal son
or the tyrannical son
and the liberal father
or the tyrannical father and the tyrannical son:
magnetism:
Anti-Christ counter-dualism:
magnetism:
pushing apart:
funny how in 3D you have 4"D" directions
to follow:
there's south north east and west:
funny:
a new strain:
DOG or DOUGLAS...
in a 3 d...
wait: the universe is a string
of narrative there is no "space" in SPACE...
there are no constellations:
the practicality of cubes triangles
and money...
new strain: like switching from *****
to wine...
like: the leafy bits: not the high market:
resin *******
the **** coming from America:
better stick with dog...
i was blindsided:
i had a temporary amnesia:
i'm a pest controller:
a William Burroughs contra Shakespeare?
wrong strain:
the drug dealer is driving a Mercedes Benz
while i'm still slumping:
happy:

to recover no Catalan but all Cyrillic:
in... ha ha....
       ЩĘŚĆE: ye: the proper Slavic
Cyrillic script:
not the Russian alphabet:
the script...
like the Nomadic script
but there are former Assyrians,
Phonecians:
Hebrews: godly:
Ishmaels and the Ahmed Nomad
Arabs...

gateway drug of literacy is Ginsberg
and Bukowski:
then you arrive at the postmodernist
futurist poets
like poets are behind philosophers
and science and science fiction and fiction
like painters:
like freaks like outsiders:
we need to find Ned in Democracy...
a John the Baptist mentality
in... "zee vilderness"...
  
if John the Baptist was looking for the Christ
then i am Matthew the Security Officer
former roofer
sometime a poet looking for my Antichrist...
disciple uno...
i own a house: you hopping grunge nerd
looking to couch surf?
am i going to be a convinced a second time
by authority of dyslexia:

the meaning of: turn the over cheek:
the meaning of: and the meek will inherit the earth:
gravity squared:
what if:

                 йѫ: as her...
the leafy sort: i sorted this one:
i get sporadic active self-aware no self
dimensions of amnesia
and i couple that with
amnesia-pareidolia...

          yes: yes: Edie: this is the war i'm waging
like Christianity waged war
with images against words
and that's how Islam was born
Islam is Christ's:
and we are: or at least i am...
           a pauper European:
the Holocaust shifted the Jews
but look how not diaspora bound and sort of
Chameleon the Jews are
i think a second Vatican in forgiving
the Turks for Constantinople
i just want Turkish: barbery....

barber: barbarism: try painting with words:
death to color! and American spelling...
****** Sputnik half-egos and serial killers
like the Cain ******* antics
but even Cain had a promise of dignity
like this culture
of watching sport and bending over
sniffing *******
not off ring around
the bellybutton Romanian prostitutes
and i will find the monster for you:
color my language: buff it up...

      i was alone and Candide:
i was alone and Candide:
just me and night and drinking and contemplating
diarhhoea, diharoeah... dih-rho-eh-ah...
whatever...
in my garden my lovely:
i planted this plum
this cherry this apple
this AGREST bush:
but these trees speak to me
i'm not a crazy cat lady
i'm a...
a botanical frenzy:
the FOX INQUIRY:
i like loik Loki and insects
and telescopes and books and dust
and postage stamps
and bicycles
and shops for girls who are pretending
to be sailors:
borderline beach of Sanskrit
Hamptons:
these? the ******* Southampton(s)?!

S N TH BJD
seriously? summoning my testimony in the Abjad?
BT RGHT NW Y DNT CR...
little brother tender uncle
i changed the strain:
these wandering stars
look much like satellites don't
think me small even dementia riddled
Joseph saw you Martin seeing one
last look:
before me the cactus on the palm
of my hand
should the Germans Unite:
Re-Unite...
like this was a tease coming from a Pan-Slavic
perspective that allowed
Marxism to exist:
apparently i'm the last neighbor of Europe
having tested Marxism into something
jumping, cheating...
the Soviet space race seemed so fake
when the polished American model arrived..
because the Slavic mingled with Hebrew
for so long that Usury was attempted to be disguised
as: reminiscence...
is it me or just me
when i say: the Hebrews attempted...

Edie? Heff OLOG...
       does that matter?
napping?
can i be a dog: no kennel:
water? yes yap yap please...
sighing panting four greeds...
four legs...
now i will have to call it the 7 x 4
the four by seven...
of all the heads my bilingual stress paramount(s)
there are four greeds
there are four envies
there are four prides:

oddly enough: adding a pluralistic
element to the structure is surreal;
i was given the equivalent
toilet paper air
quote of Chamberlain and ******
and i am ******...
pluralism: the basics of grammar:
this conflation of the pronoun
district:
i heard the hubris and hiatus
into Oriental Study and scuttling with
plagiarisms like rats...

i kiss fare for a short farewell
and i just want... something this sort of everyday
but with an access to a portal:
a healing posture of having
***
and getting all the spider or the ant
now sleeping in my head
oh that scene from Lavender... Versailles...

death of spanish queen in versailles series insect parasite
google... no good...
limited technology: either hammer and nail
or hammer and head:
shark: idiots tik tok China: SHINGLES: SMILE:
all in emoticon ridicule stress...
not included in diacritic and punctuation:
available: yes please... chains man
mind... chains man mind...
chains man mind...

                                 and all the available dittos:
but since we were a barricade against
the Mongols and the Ottomans
we were not so much grieving when the Jews
went for a Baptism in the Ashes
of the Holocaust...
things happen: in C# CONCORDANCE:
with the authority of the shrinking
constipated:
glorified somehow still with the JAW of AWE
AGAPE at the expanding universe
and how looking in trackjuit
and Adidas back is somehow distracted by
flat earth and algebra:
flat earth and algebra
while three dimensional earth and calculus: cactus:
itch: ugh... verbiage and word salads
and avocado ***** suckled
like hummingbird became twisted
and begot the butterfly that begot the congregation
of the winds in the Hurrah-Khan!

perhaps as much as the goldberg variation
    BWV 988 aria is some sort of cliche...
           and somehow... there aren't any tinges
of plagiarism in tchaikovsky's 1812 overture
plagiarisms of la marseillaise?
             well of course there would be tinges
of it: how did it manage to stay up
in classic.fm's hall of fame chart for several
years at no. 1 -
          does listening to it somehow imbue
more imagination than a tolstoy epic:
or one is more inclined to listen to the overture...
than read war and peace for
  15 minutes? if one is after a russian romance
theme:
prokofiev: alexander nevsky -
                                        battle of the ice...
the tchaikovsky answer to la marseillaise is...
sorry... where is the mass appeal?
                  it's like something penderecki would
compose for: an orchestra of pots and pans...
but that's just me...
and as for easter?
     "good news" is: i drank my way through
it... like a cobbler -
  having said the most obscene things on good friday:
apparently not necessary in the end -
the "problem" involved switching something
off... then switching something on...
never mind...
             easter... historically:
it must have happened sometime mid-august...
in that fateful year of circa 33a.d. -
   probably happened in mid-august...
while all life was apparently happening elsewhere:
it wasn't going to be a congregational
event to occupy a calendar year of:
let's say: a third of the globe...
                                 size or population...
if it's a celebration of "something" and it doesn't
have to come back to me:
kneeling and taking things: a little bit too
literally...
    i crucified winter on a friday...
              and lo and behold:
         the same annum winter to come by
december...
although: reborn... is it the third day...
from the day of the execution: to the hour...
does the resurrection come on a sunday or
on a monday?
     well... if you'd consider the sabbath...
   it doesn't happen... on the morning of waking up:
like a saturday...
         or a sunday...
and it ends upon going to bed...
  so if the crucifixion / sabbath... happened on...
the 6th hour of the afternoon:
or whatever time a crucifixion would
be most agonising and draw the most crowd
and would giving a wine soaked sponge
on the end of a lance up to that...
   crown of myrrh: why just call it "a crown of thorns"?
oh i'm pretty sure they'd dig up
all those gifts... the gold... with judas:
but seeing that they were needy times...
the rabbis didn't operate with the gold standard...
silver would have to suffice...
seems probably that the crown was crated
from myrrh:
and the frankinscenes?
  it wasn't just a crucifixion... was it?
by striping (slashing the bark) and
letting the exuded resin bleed out and harden -
eventually his body did transform
into carvings from both wood and of
various stones...
      over the matter of not celebrating easter
as a good catholic should:
because it is the tradition...
because "i am": but i am an atheist...
because your father is... because my mother
and my father and my grandmother was...
i was called irreverent...
   and from my own mother's mouth...
                            you're just an 'antichrist'...
but i do have these serious questions to ponder...
and i'm sure that to "spread the message"
i have to do it now...
because if it did happen mid-august at noon...
and even if it was a friday...
but to spread the message...
it has to happen so that...
                         i nail winter to the cross...
and three days later she comes back
              smelling of cherry tree blossoms!
i also have to stop drinking and writing...
and sitting up late...
and take great lessons in w.h. auden's words:
only the hitlers of humanity write
at night...
     no more antics with hopes of:
an easy 'abbit to be chased after with 'ookovski...
mind the B...
back to classical music...
         and more to the point...
national anthems...
sorry... what does the anthem: god save the queen
spring to mind?
contempt... irreverence...
the shortest anthem in all of history...
now... if you gave me...
   de Lisle's la marseillaise: it's an anthem you
want to sing! you want to sing it!
    now...
       whether it's john playford's
1728 'the new bath'
or it's edward nowell's 'delight'...
     hell: another suggestion...
    william of orange (the third):
        wilhelmus von nassau...
          as henry grattan flood suggested...
but of course... changing the words...
merry ol' england... merry ol' england...
   god given right to an eternal queen
and a people that will never
       fade with a whimper...
i dunno...
but anything beside that ghastly:
baroque burp and **** of an anthem...
or maybe not...
  but at least true feelings can be met
with an uninhibited pen and...
                  a matter of musical taste...
in the end.
                             at least... tchaikovsky's
1812 overture didn't make it to the number 1
place in the classic fm hall of fame chart...
and i crucified winter and out popped spring.

p.s. if you can sing auld lang syne...
come the end of the year...
i do admit: singing god save the queen
must sometimes feel like a funeral for the heart...
it's hardly the fife and drum;
but it could be!