They keep ratcheting up the pressure
They keep hatcheting for good measure
They keep laughing at their leisure
They keep blasting guns for pleasure
Creating a series of tubes
Where every which way I lose

There's an existential
Differential
From my potential
That's unintentional
For I want to be better
Than the scarlet letter
That's my resume header
And my pain embedder

But there's a series of events
That keep happening
That leaves everyone incensed
They start attacking me
Until I take my mask off
They uncomfortably back off
Get in their rocket and blast off
Until it's humanity I'm the last of

There's a pattern
That gives me purpose
So I climb a ladder
Of fruitless searches
For a freedom purchase
From a shame merchant
Who offers the joy of fantasy
At the price of a crushing reality
So I can hear Satan answering
As a doctor trying to cure my malady

I feel shame
Then humiliation
This repetitive game
Provides inspiration
To avoid every friendship
Because my love will end it
And bring a torture endless
So either way I'll be friendless
After I reluctantly ask
And they say no
Am I still expected to bask
In their beautiful glow?

I see a range of emotions
From pathetic pity to anger
Always leaving the notion
I live in a city of strangers
And walls of concrete
That can't be beat
One must take a seat
And accept defeat
Then repeat

dingly fingly
wickety wackety
overflow going up
crickety crackety
and all of the dangen, the
dingin and dongin and
on and on and onagain onagain

snippety snippety
spinagain spitagain
flatabout backwardsing
flatabout forwardsing
sobusy thisbusy
toobusy stressfactor
not stopping till rictus
or blowups and messfactor

notlearning notlistening
gofigures upratcheting
notseeing nothearing
ambivalence hatcheting
all in dingly the
wickety wack
the edge up approaching
from whichety which
will be no coming back


MChallis © 2015

Cigarettes and alcohol
Have become the simple pleasures
Of a time of complications
A lady hawk that flies like butterflies
Keeps some food in your sock
Eat some bread and spread the joy
Interest yourself in the possibilities
Think about the probabilities
Intentions can be validated in gestures
But, there is no reprieve from the guilt
These are guilty pleasures, that started as simply regret
These are simple pleasures, that are beguiling and freeing
The innocence of children in a park of moving swings and birds

The rain came down, and washed my cigarettes and stole my inaugurated abode
Hatcheting and brushing the hedges of my meadows
I'm in the lord's spirit

Finding silence in an unending peaceful voice
Desire and volition
Saltation is just a leap of faith for the miserable

Pretention is just the walk of noblemen with promiscuous women
Cigarettes, alcohol and steaks, I'm sure my appetite is tended
My hunger, ravenous, is just an obvious statement

I cannot talk through necessitous circumstance
Be a part of avian species part of the congregation
Derelict, stolid plights of valetudinarian do not amuse you, they incite your fear of ambition

Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings, cut them for size

It is not my druther
to blow my brother
tongue my sister
or **** my grandmother.
These things I eschew, eew
I wouldn’t do.

Stomping on newborn puppies
swallowing my son’s guppies
skull hatcheting smiling babies
or impaling my testicles on a spike
are things I do not like.

Pushing elderly in wheelchairs
crashing down the stairs
beating quadriplegics with chairs
or plucking my ***** hairs
are not among my cares.

Necrophilia in a porta *****
fails to excite my body.
And I wouldn’t dump scalding soup
on my neighbor’s Cub Scout troop.
But climbing a tree to stoop
a gushing **** on a neo **** group
well, that’s a whoop!

Acting a life not being myself
has retired to the dusty shelf.
Suffering as a lost fake
is on a permanent break.
Prolonging life on meds
******* and ******* in bed
I would truly dread.
Slow motion into a wood chipper
with no emotion would be way hipper!

Jeffrey Schmitz 1/4/20