We are not gaurantee that we will see another day.
We should just enjoy it before the Lord takes us away.
Because tomorrow's not promise to anyone.

If you has someone you love and cherish deeply.
Then enjoy every moment you're together.
Because you never know when you'll be call to heaven.
Because tomorrow's not promise.

Don't be like those that put off things they can do today.
And then regret not getting things done.
Don't let self pride stop you from  being able to apologize.
When you know you're the blame.

Just remember.
Tomorrow's not promise.
Not promise
Not promise to anyone.

When we must face judgment day.
Don't be one to walk slowly before the judge with fear.
Because your decision will be told for you to hear.
Just hope you done enough to get cleared.
Because tomorrow isn't promise to anyone.

Childhood trauma turns to teenage stigmata,
The **** hit the fan and I'm banned from nirvana.
Paradise is out of sight, that's the basic gist
Despite the broadcast of the sadist televangelists.
The fables of premium cable, channel six hundred sixty six.
Gone are Heaven and Hell to quell the existential fix.
There is no moral right, my solitary gaurantee
Bliss is a smoke and mirror trick, there'll always be a fee.

Hey Mr. Wall! It's your ******* up friend!
I've cut her wide open; will she ever mend?
She came to me, tears streaming, but did I wish her well?
No, instead I freaked out and she said, "Go to hell"
So it's been quite some time since I talked to her last
And I know what she speaks of, that event in the past
When I said, "I've no right to hear all of your tales
You've med all that clear; but just tell me what ails!
You're closing the doors, all the walls are air tight
You said you'd say something, well, how about tonight?"
No response did she give, so I started to worry
So I texted her, back-pedalling this time with hurry
It was next afternoon when I got the reply
Another came later: "I was bit by a guy"
I replied with an "oh" and "How'd that go down?"
She said "After, he kissed me." And I started a frown
Then the frown turned to tears and I said "Well, that's neat"
She said "Yeah" and " 'night" 'cause I guess she was beat
Well, it went on like that: nights of tears, days of silence
Day after day I had thoughts of self-violence
The White Room* was no help, and venting no good
I was sure she had a new guy like I figured she would
I just wanted a clue for me to grasp tight
With no contact from her, I hugged my pillow at night
I would openly cry, and that bugged me to hell
Because it wasn't about me; was she doing well?
I felt like a ******* and so **** needy
I wanted to hear her and that made me greedy
But **** it I loved her and wanted to know
How'd I ***** up and make her hate me so
I wouldn't find out for a week and a half
From 11 to 23 and maybe you'd laugh,
But that time was torture and helplessness thrived
Into pools of depression, I stepped forth and dived
Because I missed her so much, even before all this started
And now I had opened my mouth and we parted
My shoes were the same my own sign of depression
Then she called to say goodnight; relationship regression?
I didn't know yet, but I asked her that later
I didn't force an answer like a high school debator
She didn't want to talk, nor was that up for discussion
But at least she responded and my heart did percussion
I wanted to clear this; what did I do?
How can I fix things so we were ok, us two?
I was starting to think, maybe I'd end it
Make a noose with a chain, hoped my body didn't bend it
String me up, say goodbye, leave her better without me
Then there'd be no more reason to trust, hate, or doubt me
But I knew that'd solve nothing, So I stopped all that thinking
Because I knew she wasn't well; like myself, she was sinking
Maybe she just didn't want me anymore
Maybe dealing with stupidity was too big of a chore
I talked to my father when he caught me crying
He said, "Send her a note. Let her know that you're dying
To hear her at least, but you've got the wrong cat.
I was a no one in school. So I'm not hip to all that.
But maybe if you drop a little 'How do you do?'
She'll reply in the like and start talking to you.
I don't know her too good, so I can't gaurantee
But that's what I'd do; I mean, if you were me."
I thanked him for the talk but it didn't really aid
Me in my mission, I felt like Doug Quaid
I wasn't sure what I'd done to get this girl ******
But unlike Doug and Melina, we had never kissed
I was so afraid we'd ended, that she was moving on
While I awaited her return, she was already gone
But this wasn't the case, as I found Sunday night
When she caught me off-guard and ended the fight
"You said something upsetting." She told me right then
"I'm not sure what it was, why you said it, or when
But I know it upset me and kinda made me mad
And what's worse is you said it when I was already sad
I couldn't speak for a moment; I felt like the devil
This new info took my stupidity to the next level
I whispered, "I'm sorry" and I've never meant it more
I hated that I caused her to be so **** sore
"I don't want to be mad anymore" is what she said
"And why I was mad has just slipped from my head
We talked for some minutes; about 32, I guess
I asked, "Can I call in the morning?" and she said yes
So I'm hopeful that maybe quite soon we'll be fine
And maybe there's still a chance that she'll be mine.

Risk is a funny thing.
Sometimes it's worth it. When it's not, it hurts.
It terrifies, electrifies...even sort of clarifies.
The thing is, how do you know what could be,
If you can't choose a dream and set passion free?
Love can die and so do dreams.
But if neither are given a chance,
What could it possibly bring?
I know that you're worth it,
Because even if we should fail,
Not trying (by comparison) only pales.
I'd rather say "It didn't work." than simply "I never tried."
Because the way I feel with you is worth the tears we might cry.
So I'll take this risk, not just for you, but so that I can live.
I won't ask a gaurantee. I know your all you'll give.
Let's see what happens. It will all be okay.
Because even if it doesn't settle as I'd like,
At least we made each other smile along the way.

my words are ungracious
and spill forth today
like mewling puke....

it astounds me....
that we celebrate
landing, badly i might add,
an overpriced
piece of mechano
on the backside of a space rock...

while.....
there are people
dying... right here....
on earth....from...ebola cancer....and other diseases

it astounds me....
that one person,
can get paid, 20 million $$$$
for acting in a ****** movie
while....others beg for change and sleep rough
under park benches....

it amazes me,
that  so many in the world
cannot read or write
and do not have,
basic and i mean basic
sanitary facilities....

it confounds me.....
that wars are fought
over race and religion....

it scares me...
that my son, will grow up
in a world where safety is
far less of a gaurantee...

it saddens me....
that i am as guilty
as the next person
of passing by
oe looking the other way
become too busy, too be
involved...in other peoples
pain...

my words,
ungracious
and hypocritical
are but the useless prattle
of a ranting raving imbicele
mere  spit upon the winds
of a word in turmoil....

but come on...
should we not try
to fix this world
before discovering others

Searching and searching
but what will you find
is the search realistic
or an illusion on mind?
the clouds seem so thick
and where is the sun
it comes out for awhile
and then you run
you hide in the darkness
where you think it's safe
but what of your soul
won't it die in that place?
you wonder why
you search in vain
you wonder why
theres so much pain
you'll never find it
in that place you hide
open your doors
come outside
Its only here
your search will end
the pain will lessen
joy will begin
take that chance
and I gaurantee
it might not be roses
but you will see
your search will be real
and it might take awhile
but no more illusions
or locking the file
the clouds will break
and the sun will shine
your heart will smile
given some time
you'll find yourself
basked in the light
and then you will ask
"why did I hide?"

Something about his words
And the way they seep into my skin
Makes me feel at home
Something about the thought of future
Of blind promise
Comforts me
Keeps me close at night
Almost lets me forget
That someone else
Has his heart
That it is not some vacant capacity I get to move in to
I am not the only one
Who swirls his image in daydream
Wanting to taste him
Honey on my tongue
Both bitter and sweet at once
Wanting nothing more
Than to drown in eyes and whiskey
Fall quiet to tranquil arms
And ocean wave nights
Wanting
To know love
That isn't synonymous
With interference
My imagination
Works so well
That I almost forget
I am not the only star in his galaxy
That there is no gaurantee
Of becoming sun
More likely
To be supernova burnt out
Turned dust
Unlikely to be remembered
I set my hopes
Much higher than I can reach
Forget about my fear of heights
Dive directly into open hands
I cannot be sure of certainty in another
And most times
I feel more like a waiting problem
Than something to be desired
Feel more late night paramour
Than planned ambition
I have worn the name
Other woman
Too many times
Have it sewn on black lace bra
Branded on porcelain pale skin
Am only young girl marked temptress
I will never believe
That anybody could want this permanently
When all I have ever been is second place passed down
All I have ever been is sideline
Something to come back to
When the rest has died out
I tell him
That I want to be his only
That I could be
Everything he wants me to be
He tells me
I already am
But that there is settling in situations to be done
I tell him
I understand
When really I don't
Know too well that there is not enough room in a heart
For two to fit comfortably
I tell him
Okay
That I will be here waiting patiently
Hanging on
To his words
Until they mold
Into something
That can love me back
Until they morph
Into something
Tangible.

To devote my life
to my son
To gaurantee
he will get
A COLLEGE DEGREE
and end this
Lifetime of pain
So for
future generations
to come
Possible future
Grandaughters
and
Grandsons
You will not suffer
at the hands
Of the ones
that love you the most
Because i decided
your Dad was the man
for the job
Because i decided
to choose love
Because the pain
I was dealt
Hurt me enough
to not give up
But to gaurantee
my loved ones
Will never
have to measure
to the pain
I WAS DEALT
THE PAIN I FELT
I WANT CONSTANT CHANGE
IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION
TO BREAK THE CHAINS
OF THIS LIFE' S DEVIL
TO GIVE MY FAMILY
A FIGHTING CHANCE
let me live that long
let me sing that song
Let me achieve that goal
Let me save my future
SOULS
Forget my plans
forget me as a man
But please let me gain
A life without strain
A life with future brains
of being PURE

Rules are made to be ?
Followed ?
Broken ?
Or to gauge a level of ?
Control !

Rulers are made to be ?
Followed ?
Broken ?
Or to gauge a level of ?
Control !

Dictatorship
or
Democracy
Are the same?

Both
have
One
In complete control!

Person
or
Party
Both with hidden agendas!

Vote
for
Vote
Individually we don't count!

Millions
upon
Millions
Invested with no gaurantee!

Promises
upon
Promises
For all the wealthy!

Insider
trading
Inside
The electoral stock market!

Taxes
upon
Taxes
Delayed for the bidders!

Home
to
House
The super rich and wealthy!

Land
of
Slaves
The working class!

Home
of
The
Fee, it costs us all!

Hell
on
Earth
Politics truly are our sickness!

Difference relevant
various forms
False measurements
begin to form
Shape shifting
slowly creating
An internal stranger
no acquaintance
Unfamiliar figure
visions blurred
Absent shadow
wipe your eyes
Fogged mirrors
reflect unwanted imagery
Who have i become?
Sweaty palms
dry skin
Bloodshot eyes
dandruff hair
Stubble beard
look of despair
Anger fills your mind
false illusions
Of the previous night
leave a cloud of doubt
One thing is certain
and that is......
The "HOW"
before accepting fault
You quickly engage
telling yourself
In the back of your mind
it's not your fault
Keep playing the victim
knowing your plenty capable
Traumatic childhood
left in the past
Never realizing
the importance
It will have on the present
the same childhood friend
That got you through it all
now is the biggest culprit
Allowing your mind
to pretend its never your fault
Imagination, always their
to save the day
Allowing yourself
to procreate
Thoughts of weakness
ability to misdirect
The tough conversations
your favorite sidekick
An all purpose tool
for all occassions
Especially the ones
that put you on the spot
Preventing yourself
from overcoming the past
Allowing you, to live a lie
lets not forget
Although its a small circle
we both know **** well
Creativity shows up
Imagination's favorite
friend
They saved you as youth
kept your mind
off all the abuse
They made being poor
not seem so tough
They got you through
some really bad breakups
Hell! they both
were the majority
of the responsibility
For everytime
a girl fell in love
You expect me to believe
these two childhood friends
I have always been able
to count on
The very two
that always had my back
The very two
No one could ever
take me from
They have now transformed
allowing insecurities
to be easier to hide
All the training over the years
were only suppressing
Allowing me to avoid
keeping me weak
Allowing my mistakes
always to be justified
Things aren't always
as they seem
R..AD
B..T. ..EN
..HE
L..N..S
Don't become
that someone
That will allow
your past
From preventing
self-love
Be someone
that you will
Not have to
learn to love
When you can
GAURANTEE
THE REFLECTION
looking back
Is exactly who
You want to see
Often its
the in between
That is literally
the actual message
We can't, always be
focusing on literal terms
When we have
STRONG MINDS
to interpret what we see
Into what it means
Into what we believe
and everything in between
INTERPRET