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the raiders show, full time report, 21 march 2015, we ****



as we draw the final curtain, the raiders **** again

it was a great start but then they faded away

just like they usually do

you see the raiders were woeful, especially in the 2nd half

no i am discusted oh yeah

it was the worst match, back to the old drawing board


johnny’  thanks and what a woeful performance in the end, by the raiders, and it actually is a hard

job picking the raider of the match, only one raider scored in the second half, but here is sue longways

with the raider of the match, horrible effort

sue’  yeah, johnny, it was a horrible effort but the raider of the match goes to brett austin, now brett what went wrong

brett’  well, sue, we were woeful in that second half, and the dragons were just too good

sue’  yeah, were you thinking victory, at half time, maybe too over confident so to speak

brett’  yeah, maybe we were over confident in the first half, but the dragons got 8 points before the break, and

then another 14, well, anyway, terrible match

sue’   anyway here is the raider of the match medallion, congrats and now here is bob from gordon

bob’   and now we draw the final curtain, the raiders **** again

it was a really terrible game, buddy a terrible match for the raiders team

yeah the raider, ya know they do ****, it was a woeful game

what happened to the hopeless raiders, ya know the raiders ****

what is wrong with the mighty raiders, they didn’t look so mighty tonight

why couldn’t the raiders win it, i think it’s just that their hopeless

sue’   and now here is johnny brown with his jingle, not our johnny brown, johnny from duffy

johnny’   we are on the rocking horse caused by the raiders losing

you see we rocked all day long

they are sitting on the rocking horse, all day long, my love

i wished our raiders won

you see, the raiders had a bad match, good start, but hopeless finish

really the raiders faded, yeah, what a woeful effort, yeah woeful effort woeful effort yeah mate ****** yeah

sue’   thanks johnny brown, and now back to our johnny brown

johnny’   thanks sue, that was a terrible match and to make matters much worst, we play the roosters next game

and i say, we’ll lose to the roosters next week and here is micheal with his jingle

micheal, go the dragons, we kicked some ****** ***

go dragons, we showed some fucken class

yeah the mighty st george, oh yeah, yeah they were great in the end

go dragons kick some ****** ***, go dragons, show some ****** class

go the dragons go the dragons, dragons won true blue, GO DRAGONS

johnny’  ok now everybody it’s beer o’clock and the raiders were given a football lesson, a rootball lesson

and we have the reason to give canberra much credit, except for the first 18 points

CATCH YA NEXT TIME raiders show fans

DRAGONS OVER RAIDERS 22 - 20
A Jan 2014
I hope you noticed.
I hope you saw me go.
I hoped you turned around,
To see my foot prints in the snow.

I hope you feel hurt.
I hope you care.
I hope you went to turn to me,
To see i was no longer there.

I hope I mean something.
I hope the something is good.
I hope im not annoying,
And I did what i should.

I hope you feel a loss.
I hope you feel blue.
I hope you feel cold,
With all your friends around you.

I hope you feel betrayed.
I hope you feel discusted.
I hope you feel dissapointed,
That our friendship is pretty rusted.

I hope you feel regret.
I hope you feel pain.
I hope you know whos fault it is,
And your the one you blame.

I hope you know I walked away.
I hope you missed my goodbye.
Oh how I hope so many things,
When I'm just about to cry.
Rachelle Wilkins Jun 2015
It's my first day of high school this should be great.. my middle school life wasn't so good I know I'm over weight and I'm not the best looking ******* the block but I'm nice and these are all new people so this should be a different experience.

My first day was terrible everyone made fun of my hair and even the fact that one of my teeth were crooked... maybe tomorrow will be better...

1 month later...October

Nothings changed other than the fact that I have just been diagnosed with depression.. maybe I just need to chill out...Everyone is still making fun if my looks especially my weight..

2 months later December

I couldn't wait for break to come around everyone's bullish is just getting worse I stopped eating so I could lose a little weight and now I can't even look at food without being discusted with myself..

2 weeks later January
I went back to school after break I've lost some weight but I'm looking kind of pale and sickly..my sleeves slid up some during 4th period and a girl saw and pointed it out and everyone started calling me a freak /.\ I feel even worse about myself... I don't even feel like I belong on this world anymore...

4 days later..
I slipped up and ate a slice of pizza. I went to the bathroom to throw it up... I'm not allowing myself to eat if I eat I'll gain more weight... fat is hidioues skinny is beautiful.. atleast that's what tv says...

1 month later February
It's valentine's day and this guy from school asked me up maybe things are finally looking up for me this is great!!!

Later that day
I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT HE DID. He stood me up the texted me that he would never be with a fat pig like me...

That night
I was looking in the mirror and I've gained weight I can't believe this I must really be getting fatter I thought I was losing weight.  /.\

Next day
I didn't even go to school I never wanna go back it's the worst place ever I don't even wanna see that boy who called me a fat.

That night
I can't sleep
the worrying of going back that hell hole is keeping me up
I can't eat because that means I'll gain weight
I can only just sit in my room and cry and look forwardto the day I die.. I just cut myself and hurt myself because it makes the bigger pain go away even if it's just for a day..

6 weeks later March
I just got out of the psychiatric unit because I tried to overdose on medicine.... I really want to die because it's not worth living in this effed up world that does nothing but bring me down.

Week later
I went back to school and everyone started calling me names and saying I was a freak and crazy and pycho. And they didn't want to be near me because I might try to **** them then **** myself...

That night
I can't do it anymore I get an anxiety attack by just thinking about going to school I just can't do it I can't live in this world anymore..

Midnight
I was listening to this song and It really made me realize what I wanted to say as my final words...

All those kids at school were right..I'm worthless..stupid..and I can't do a thing right. I know I'm ugly and fat. I'm in pain all the time, I'm depressed. I can't take it no more I'm a wreck...I just hope you can forgive me mom. All those kids at school made me feel worse about myself. I had no friends and everyone picked on me about everything about me...the beat me up almost everyday and no one cared enough to help... no one reached out.. I was just the ugly fat cow who made made a fool of herself everyday. I just hope you'll remember me for our good times and the fun things we did together. You always called me an angel well maybe I'm just an angel that wants to go home...Well I have to go I'm running out of space to right and my hands are trembling so back... I just hope you could forgive me..Mom you were the only one there for me I don't want you to feel this was your fault I just couldn't take it anymore...
Goodbye

1 am
She dragged the chair to the attic, she tied the rope around the beam, and she put the noose around her neck and on the count of three she took the leap...
Ashley cogger Mar 2015
you where the one that left me in the cold
you where the one that lied
you where the one that beat me so bold
And im the one that died

you where the one that stood so proud
while i cried in side
you where the one so loud
And im the one with no pride

you where the one that i loved
the one i trusted
but now you shuved
me out, quite francly im discusted
# **** that *****
Natalia Oct 2015
Helpless of finding you again, you have fallen. Fallen into the deep mist of her. Your eyes so taken under the spell that I once gave you. You fall every season for another. I'm disgusted I thought you were stronger than that. I see you weak and uncertain . A man I used to admire I now pitty. I was so blind. You were not the person I thought you were. And what's so interesting is that I didnt start to grow discusted by your infidelity but by how you can't bare the thought of being independent, you can't bare the thought of being alone, you rely on company. And at that moment I realized that we definitely wasn't meant to be.
Raeann Jun 2020
Good morning I say
To the closet door
I knock three times

A look into the void as it opens
I look at the shapes of clothing I'll never wear

Discusted
I Look at my reflection on the doors mirror

Prodding at poking at my insecurity
I close the door
I go to bed
Ill try again tommrow.
Feeling weird about myself
Thehorrible Jul 2018
Who am i...no one
As i pass by even with a quick glimps I'm discusted of what i see...
As I stand there and stare..
My burden thoughts begin..
I see curls that are wild and free...
I see big brown eyes with a frame of glasses...
I see pink lips...
I see a figure of a size thats not fair...
I see pale skin...
I see legs that just want to run to feel free...
I look up agian to see who am i...
I am someone who i wish not to be...
Now in bed putting my burden thoughts to sleep
I really dont know...
Knave of bards May 2020
You know the Five Stages Of Grief?

It's like that.

Stage one, Bargaining.
I told him I'd do anything, absolutely anything to keep him in my life.
I pleaded, I begged. I was ready to drop anything and everything for him.
Just for him.
All for him.

Always.

for.

him.

He was worth my entire life.
At the drop of a hat.

Or a noose.

Then came the Grief. I was... Incomparably sad.
My life fell apart, I felt nothing but pain.
Felt like my guts were being torn out, and spilled at his feet.

Choking on tar

my mind was never quiet.
It was all my fault, If I'd been better I'd still be his.
It hurt.
So much.
  So
       So
            Much.

Then Anger.
It was his loss, I was SICK AND ******* TIRED OF BEING ******* OVER BY HIM! I deserved BETTER than that ******* and whatever PITIFUL MEANINGLESS FLING our two years HAD BEEN.
I'd burn every precious **** thing he'd given me.
He'd filled my life with bits of him... Art, poetry, clothes. Built me palaces of paragraphs.
I'd tear it all out of me as if it was a tumour.
A desise.
Discusted by the thought I'd ever affiliated myself with his filth.. Inch by toxic inch I'd tear him away. Dig in my nails and press hard Hard HARD with the point of my razor.

Then I crashed.
The fourth stage, Depression kicked in.

Nothing had meaning,

my anger had evaporated, without it I was the shell of the person I used to be.
Empty
Cold.
Dull.
His City lay,
all burned out,
no longer aflame,
my highway overpasses crumbling and scarred with decay.

My dark glassy eyes now dry, no more rain soaked asphalt.

No more laughter or dancing.

No more cheap laminate countertops.
and he was gone.

And he was gone.
And
     He
            Was      
                        G O N E.

Like watercolour dripping off a canvas.

Nothing i could do. I had no purpose anymore.
My life was cold and grey without him lighting it up, painting cave walls with his love.
My perfect, perfect boy.
He'd gone forever.
I slept and slept and slept. To try and stave off the emptiness. The hollowness he'd left inside of me.
To pass the seconds ticking by without him. It didn't hurt, I was just... in my heart there was emptiness. Grey and blank and hard as cold concrete. All the bright chalk mandalas washed away.
Now the last step.
Acceptance.
Acceptance.
Acceptance.
I'm working on it.
I can live without him. He's not my one and only perfect thing. I wasn't blinded by love. I was idealistic. Hopeful and nieve, praying and begging to anything that could mean hope, that he wouldn't leave.
Now I realise You are, Tom. Toby and and Emma are.
Pippa and Frankie and Willow and Jack and Chris.
Molly and Emily and... Me.

Every beautiful person in my life.

I know none of you would leave me.

Not like he did.

The song. Our song.


Honeybee

It feels like acceptance to me too.
I know it's dumb, it's just a song, but it came on shuffle last night and I think it triggered this.
I'm far from okay,
but I'm closer than I've been before. ****, I've got trust issues, I feel like I can't ever let anyone that close again.

I'm terrified of vulnerability.
But that's what you're here for.
You guys are gonna help me out the other side.



Thank you so much for that.



"Hello Goodbye, Twas nice to know you
How I find myself without you
That I'll never know
I let myself go
Hello Goodbye, I'm rather crazy
And I never thought I was crazy
But what do I know?
Now you have to go"

You set me free.










I
Forgive
You.


Even if you hate me.
Even if it should be the other way round, and you can't. Won't.
I loved us.
And I'm sorry.
🖤
I know.
I know Its gonna be hard.
But I refuse to hate him. Or myself for it. And god, I've never actually ever been able to be angry at him before. He ******* me over so many times. Probably without knowing he was breaking me. I refuse to be another of his broken toys. He broke up with me on a regular basis, and didn't even ask me if we wanted to get back together. We always just did. Because, I guess, he already knew my answer. It would always be an unquencing gratified 'yes'. An unspoken 'always'. Not this time. Not that he wants me back. But no hate. No regret. Not any more. He's cost me so many emotions. I'm not sparing him anymore. I just wish things were different. If he was more trusting we'd still be friends. Not necessarily lovers, but I will still miss the times when I could call him my best friend. But I guess it's his loss. And for the first time in pretty much forever... I'm okay with that.
Knave of bards Apr 2020
Dear gender queer kid,
I know this is difficult.
I know that you're struggling.
I know that you're perpetually discusted by the shape of your body, the mismatch... The... distortion,
Dear queer kid, I know it isn't right.
I know it isn't fair.
The fact that you have to live with being ridiculed and invalidated for living your truth.
I know you're confused, clumsily attempting to tick all the right boxes for a society seemingly hellbent on making you pick one... Or the other.
Are you a sister or a brother?
Will you be a father or a mother?
Going whole days dehydrated because you don't want to be in the wrong bathroom.
And yes- it's okay not to use the disabled toilet.
Your gender is not a disability.
It should not be treated as a liability.
Your gender is FREAKING BEAUTIFUL!!!
So dear queer kids-
Have hope, have pride!
You are bold and bright, you don't need to hide
...who YOU are!
This letter is to Ash and Kai,
Jay and Ty,
To Sam and Rebel,
To Atlas and Rowan.
All the they's and them's
The zi's zir's and zim's
The fluids, and neo pronoun users... Stay strong.
And know that I am with you.
Every grueling step of the way.
All the ones who spend every day
Enduring abuse from ignorant strangers, who wouldn't think twice about actually trying to understand, accept, or even just know you.
All the "*****" the "benders" and "trannys".
The "perverts" the "toasters" (yes that is actually a thing.)
And "*****".
All the "drag shows" and "freaks"-
Turn every cutting word into another stitch on your flag! Not your skin, Or your soul.
And remember -
It will get better!
You'll move out!
Meet people who love you, just for being YOU.
They'll use the right pronouns and name.
So fly your flag high, and never forget or underestimate OUR power.
Strength in numbers, and your **** well not alone!
We WILL be loud and fight tirelessly against those who try to strip us of our rights to simply exist.
We are proud!
WE ARE US!
and we're not ever going to be anything else.
So here's to the days yet to come.
Here's to them.
Here's to us!
And here's to pride.

Signed with love,
Scotty. ***

— The End —