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Ana Habib Jul 2019
I was hoping I could forget you
Because it was the easiest thing to do
As i became busy with school and work
Met new people and forged better relationships
Met Mr Right but no he turned out to be A mix of Jekle and Hyde
It hurt but I grew from it
Burned old memories and continued on
Hopeful of better things and fully motivated to do kick ****
Except I really didnt
I was busy for sure but you invaded my thoughts
I got to thinking
You made mistakes and so did I
I pushed you away because i thought I deserved a whole lot better
Except I was blind to see that you had almost all the qualities i had been secretly looking for in a man
The rest would have been mended with patience guidance and a blind eye
Except I couldnt wait any longer even though we had spend 4 years together already
I nagged critisized, praised some but usually lost my patience with you
Some days were great
Just the two us, great food, music that would be soon be forgetten, and questionable weather
Until that just didnt do it anymore
I seriously began to question your ambitions and the future
You always said you were unsure of what to do
You were great at other things though
Cooking and tidying up was second nature
Your pictures always captured what the rest of the world couldnt see
Your writting could make the crankiest man feel something
You were always there to help me with work and assignments
In short helping me achieve my goals
You never short on encouragement and motivation
I miss it now
You stayed up all night with me whenever I felt rejected by world
Always went out of the way to make me feel special when i felt ugly
Loved when I felt worthless
Calm when i felt like tearing things apart
I miss it now
You never stopped sending me little tokens of care and appreciation when my body could not keep up with what life threw at me
Made me feel better when I withdrew into myself and couldnt leave the bed
Made my life easier in about 50 different ways
Thats when I knew you really felt something for me
But i was afraid to call it love
I wish i could I have appreciated all of that just a little more
I realize now that I was usually in the red
You constantly put up with my ugly side
The continuous nagging, and critism in all that I did
You bared it
The cripping self doubt i had about myself
You bared it
The draining negativity that would sometimes fly from my lips
You bared it
All that that couldnt have been easy to deal with
But you did not complain very much being only a few years older then me and far away from your own family
You were always so quiet around me but never completely lost your cool
I dont remember you screaming or raising a hand
I am sorry for all the times I physically pushed you away
I wanted to be alone and sometimes I just didnt know how to say no
I am sorry that I was demanding, at times needly and plain disrespectful through speech
My anger was alway red hot but you found a way to turn it off with a chuckle, joke or distraction
The tv helped
But I never thanked you enough for it
Didn't show you enough gratitude because I was always busy
Busy planning, conquering, and then finally loosing
It all came crashing down
I am sorry for that
You cried but I didn't feel much until it was all over
I was always looking for much better, only to end up with barely enough
I don't know where you are right now and its ok that you stopped keeping contact with me
Most people wouldn't want to speak to a terrible woman
You were the first to realize it
I wish I had seen it in time
I have change a lot since that day
But I would not be lying if I said now that I sometimes wish he was you
Shaquille Reid Apr 2018
Bank robbery.

As fate contemplates,
My spirit reciprocates;
Swaying swiftly in circles,
Like ice skaters doing figure eight's.
At this rate I couldn't indicate,
what decisions to make.
Wether to bear this weight,
Or to catch a break.
I began to shake,
because my palms are sweaty
From holding this brand
new thirty eight;
Watch As I hold it steady
To the temple of this featherweight.
"See for heaven's sake,
You lucky I wouldn't send you up
with two bullets each eye";
That way you're wide awake
When your sprit trancends.
Just you wait,
It'll rise like dead fish
in Great Lake filled with your tears.
Because it grinds my gears,
When the this person's fear
Pierces my ears.
Agony screams,
as I beat the dreams
from their brain seams.
The hilt of my gun gleams,
Because of the dripping.
Satin red streaks
so there's no cripping.
Only demands shouted
to the power of ten.
Who's alongside me to follow?
My brethren or better kin.
"NOW PUT THE MONEY IN THE BAG!!"
QUICK!!
HURRY UP!!
I WONT REPEAT MYSELF ONCE AGAIN!!"
The terror in her face gave me a slight grin.
I grabbed her shirt
Brought her in closer.
I pushed up the barrel,
right under her chin.
Tears streamed down her face,
Her makeup smeared.
Her life abduction,
should be the only thing she feared.
Though my lackey stands clear,
about 10 feet away.
Then he aimed down his sights at me,
as if he was gonna spray.
My thoughts,
now in a disarray;
He shouts,
"LET HER STAY!!
THERES NO TIME TO PLAY!!"
Simultaneously,
hearing sirens coming this way.
The screeching tires echoed
About a block away.
But we parked about a block
to be safe.
So out the back,
through the alleys,
We ran with 6 duffles filled to the brim.
Collectively,
3 guys,
So 2 bags belonged to him.
50 meters away from the van,
We're running as fast as we can.
The sirens off in the distance ceased,
Everything is going according to plan.
We arrive,
Slide the van door open,
Then my lackeys nose Is broken.
As he falls to the floor a man,
Gets out the van.
Someone gets shot in the face.
Blood and brain batter
Exploded all over the place.
Queasiness strikes my intestine,
And my heart,
fear infested.
My inner thoughts race,
As I think about the van being contested.
Fear dissipates,
Rage congregates,
Then I let off a few rounds from the .38.
The man drops,
Then tires screech.
It seems the police have reached.
The intercom bellows,
"FREEZE! HANDS IN THE AIR!"
I looked down an noticed three bags gone.
Life is so unfair.
Storytelling
Here we go again
Nothing new to gain
Forced to feign
caused by pain.
Can hope feint
fade to black
this life ill fated.
Dreams dated.
Unknwn Aug 2021
I get the feeling why everyone wanted this.
It is an addictive drug that one would miss.
A definite excuse to be someone you're not.
A mere excuse to really be out of your comfort.
It is really something that everyone really longs for.
It has been and always will be.

I have not really thought on how I ended up with the feeling.
A soothing, calming and uneasy ecstacy that's cripping in.
I may be falling.
It's addictive.
It's comforting.
It's something.



I may be falling and I'm trying to fall further into the pit.

— The End —