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jonathan valonis Jun 2010
Pop, Pop pop, Pop, Pop, Pop pop, Pop,
Boom, Boom boom, Bfff, Boom, Boom boom, Bfff,
Shsh, Shsh Shsh, Ffwka ffwka ffwka,
Five, Four, Three, Two, Oooooonnnnnneeeee,
Boomdth, Boomdth, Boomdth, Chwochit, Chwochit, Chwochit,
Boomdth, Boomdth, Boomdth, Chwochit, Chwochit, Chwochit,
Chwochit, Chwochit, Chwoooooochhhhhhhhitttttt,
Now get down, I get down, Now get down, I get down,
Bwahhwow, Bwahhwow, Bwahhwow, Bwahhwow, Bwahhhhhhhhh,
Vooooooooo Booom, Dtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdt, Boff, Da, Dede,
Dtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdt, Boff, Da, Dede, Dtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdt, Boff, Da, Dede, Dtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdtdt, Uuuuuuhwaaaaaaaa
there was a little bear he loved the bingo hall
marking of his numbers to the callers call
with his felt tip pen he would mark them off
crossing off his numbers a proper bingo boff

he just loved to shout when ever he had won
playing games of bingo gave him so much fun
people they all loved him there mascot now his he
printed on a t shirt for all the world to see
Micheal Wolf Jan 2014
I know a girl called Ruby
Whose little sister is quite groovy
Her name is Eva and she shouts and screams!
Makes us want to disappear!
Ruby always winds her up till she screams
Then gets told off
But Eva has a secret weapon
When she sees Rubys least expecting
There comes a pong without a sound
A trouser cough? A silent pop?
Oh my god she's done a boff!
Run for cover she's let one off
Or was it mummy?
Oh blame the dog!
RJ Days Apr 2014
I met a girl named Alice Klar
She was the finest girl I saw
We made my day all bright and nice;
About the night I can’t speak at all!

Alice played with words all day
She’d find some Wort and write a play
To Lebenstraße she’d walked just twice
Even though I’d beg and though I’d plea

But I can’t recall for the life of me
Why that day Alice stopped for tea
Running along she’d chase the mice
Until they fell into the Spree

I’d always worried that her talcum hair
Would bring on suitors far more fair
But I never imagined that her vice
Would be an expat Fräuline eating rice

Amid the essence of food and the summer heat
When there in the Platz the two did meet
And a strong stark woman with heart of ice
Swept Alice Klar up off her feet

Since that day I’ve had no song in heart
Except for brats and hounds that bark
It’s now despite want of love and spice
Her memory fades into the dark

Still I have hope though you may scoff
That this man I am can surely boff
Another ribald maiden low in price
Then that old ***** Alice I can write off!
there was a little bear he loved the bingo hall
marking of his numbers to the callers call
with his felt tip pen he would mark them off
crossing off his numbers a proper bingo boff

he just loved to shout when ever he had won
playing games of bingo gave him so much fun
people they all loved him there mascot now his he
printed on a t shirt for all the world to see
Johnny Noiπ Jun 2018
In some far off future place somewhere
just  this place someone w/ a big-*** brain
will ask his fellow space-brains what was
this thing called a beautiful woman?
The other elongated heads look at the guy
w/ huge flashing eyes: no one's spoken of
such things since the earth became uninhabitable          
from irradiation: 0-☉|☉. )|( .♀︎= xo∞+Xy.
      'I don't care a **** about the fate of mankind
[lost cause] - I'm talking about the human female;
       she is said to have had va-va-voom;  
now he was really getting stares; but... 'I was just wondering how long she
  was -' he said w/ finality -' - do u mean how long ago?
Many light many light years;  the earth has been dead
for over a million years;   where did u get this archaic    
                           idea of    'woman' -
      'y'know what - just **** u, guys - [-]'ll do my own research -
      I'll go look it up in the Akasha records;    
      u're all a bunch of *****-' said the spaceman
      walking out on his buds, all staring w/ eyes
      of all kinds at each other & everywhere else
at once [                           ] (                  )    
the question having been asked since
time began as soon as there was light;
some guy said how tall are u, & she said she didn't know,
but she looked like a lanky fifteen so he took   her home
to see if she could cook & if not he
could always        her, or something -
since philosophers began
themselves questions they
couldn't answer they wondered
how long the girl's legs were. the way
she stepped in her high-heel sandals every man
had to know the answer to the question of her height -
statuesque is a word they used to describe a woman
they actually made a statue of; Venus has no arms
but she didn't         need arms to kick poor Tiresius
           in the ***** & that was b/c she liked him - him & Adonis,
        who met a gory end, Hermes got some & ducked out
        w/out his winged sandals before Apollo,
        his old Nemesis & brother came home  
    to         house of the sun where Aphrodite
       lay sunning herself on the hot tar roof thinking
of      Vulcan & his big blazing       hammer     |  
          beating steel into swords      -    
                    atop a soft blanket of Fenris          wolfskin;    ;
Einstein once asked Bohr 'how long is a beautiful woman?'
& Niels didn't miss a beat; saying tot old Einstein: 'A woman
is beautiful over every inch of her body, therefor e a beautiful woman is only an inch -' & not expecting that rejoinder Einstein threw in his two-cents: 'relatively speaking that same inch can be expanded
        to cover miles in every direction & yet remain a single inch; -'
           'Now yer getting it, boy,'              replied the older scientist;
'if u can't beat 'em, eat 'em -'
there were prostitutes outside & the two boys
got a couple of easy girl to go to the canteen w/   them
& then back to a little hide-away the physicists shared
when they wanted to be around women who were stupid
as fence-rails & theses prostitutes                  were so illiterate they
could barely  speak - fək -
Scheiße:             Definitions of ****
noun:    an act of ****** *******.
verb:                 have ****** ******* with          (someone)     duh.
ruin or damage                  (something) by ******* it             .
exclamation;  
used alone      or as a noun ( the **** )
or a verb in various (            ), abusive,                    phrases to express anger,
annoyance, contempt, impatience, (                  );    
or surprise, or simply for emphasis.
[noun: *******, piece of ***, nookie,
                                                                ­ shtup, nooky, ****,
*****, ***, *******, piece of tail]
verb: bed, to bed, lie with, get laid, have it off,
sleep with, ****, love, jazz, sleep together,              bonk, bang, boff,
have ***, make out, eff, know, *****,
be intimate, make love, do it, have *******
                                   don't **** with me, man, said Al scaring the girls punk-*** **** off by flashing    [the ****** were duly impressed]
the Ruger .25 he always                    carried in his vest pocket;
[                                                        ­                          ] ...
['Oh, ****!' she said. 'Oh, ****! Oh **** me! **** me!
Harder! Oh ! Aah! Ah-ah-Uh-huuh-na...']
****, it won't start;(              ) go **** yourself;
they can go and **** if they want to; [they're old enough -]
****!     *******, **** up, **** around,
****-up, **** about, I don't give a ****!
Michael John May 14
to write is to live
or to die
it is to give

to write is with
or without
you as, if..

to write is biff
or boff-
some sieve..
sieve-a person who can not keep a secret..

— The End —