You all know how I died,
And I do not.
But I hope it was a fantastic
Spectacle of how to make your heart stop.

I hope I died flying backwards
in a crimson ball of flame,
Or fighting off a tiger
that never could to tame.

I hope I died with a smile on my face,
Beaming from ear to ear,
Or laughing so that everyone around
Could hear.

I hope I died doing something
To which my mother always said “No”,
“But if we don’t try,
How will we ever know?”

I hope I died not waiting for
Air to no longer suffice,
Lying in a bed with a tube
In every orifice.

I hope you did not let me age
And forget you,
Because I would be
Filled with regret too.

So I hope it was a spectacular expression
Of more than just existing,
I hope they oohed and aahed while
I flew through the air a-twisting.

And I can see some of you are grieving,
yet I know not why,
Because this is a celebration of
Life having been lived
And not a sombre lullaby.

So fill your glasses,
Cups and jugs,
And let’s see a smile on those
Ugly old mugs.

There’s a lesson too be learned,
and that is clear to see.
So without much further ado,
“Here’s to me!”

She said to me she liked my suit but...
"Bite your tongue" I replied
She said "but no I only meant..."
"I don't need your approval" I lied

"It really is quite nice" she whispered
her face now red with shame
"Like it or not, I hardly care
to me it's all the same"

I walked away with head held high
but feeling oh so bad
why had I uttered these angry words
and made her look so sad

Was  it the disappointment
that she hadn't oohed and aahed
after the time I had spent choosing
were my  feelings so on guard

I'd wanted her to be proud of me
and give me so much praise
but as usual the "but" was added
it was always there these days

So my defensive ego reared up
and had bitten her in spite
criticism I couldn't take
and my nerves told me to fight

Scream at the World and be ******
my inner self did shout
as tears now rolled down my face
while I looked for a way out

Taking my courage in both hands
I turned and wiped my eyes
"Forgive me please I'm sorry
for emitting all those lies"

"It's my love of all things you
that has made me highly strung
I only wish that I'd been silent
and bitten my own tongue"

She looked at me with sadness
and then turned her head away
"Goodbye you ******* ******"
was all I heard her say

The End.

I'm the envy of all my of neighbors
Way to easy it should be a crime
Everyone on the street treats me like royalty
Since I went and purchased a Double Wide

They all came a running when they heard the horns a honking
As the semi pulled into the street
It was a magical day just like a parade
Dogs barking, children screaming
as the mayor came out and shook hands with me

The local news came in with their cameras
The valumptuous blond liked the siding of torquoise blue
She got next to me real kozy
And asked if she could give me a late night interview

Since I now seem to be a celebrity
All the men oohed and aahed
as I gave them the tour
They all want to be best friends with me
As the women cood and cawed
begging for more

Never before in their lives had they ever seen
a toilet and sink in the brightest of pink
As they blushed and stuttered trying to speak
one way or another making google eyes at me

This possibly could be the very best thing
Turning out to be a wonderful buy
I would never have known or could ever think
When I purchased my Double Wide