Today I finally let go
Of all the pain that you have made
The damage that you did
And the way I've felt betrayed

Today I finally let go
Of the overwhelming toxicity
The pain that over-took me
And of a life without simplicity

Today I finally let go
Of the doubts that filled my head
All the helplessness inside
The inability to move ahead

Today I finally let go
Of carrying around that fake smile
Plus all the weight of self enmity  
Which caused each step to be a trail

Today I finally let go
Of that devastating negativity
Feeling like I was worthless
And wanting so badly to flee

Today I finally let go
Of feeling like I couldn't be me.
Today I finally let go of you.
Today I am finally free.

I used to believe in destiny
I used to believe in fate
I thought I'd end up at just the right place
And everything would just be great

I used to believe in honesty
In speaking up for what you believe
I thought people would value the truth
I didn't think that they would leave

I used to believe in people
That deep down everyone is good
That's why violence, cruelty, and abuse
Were things that I never understood.

If there is good in everyone
Do people just choose the bad?
Do they decide that life is more fun
When your goal is to make others sad?

If being honest is always best
Then why does it create drama?
Arguments, attacks, and insults...
Why not save ourselves the trauma?

If there is really some higher plan
Why do so many people end up falling flat
People are bullied, abused, homeless
Tell me, what kind of master plan is that?

I used to believe in destiny
Maybe I was just naive
I used to believe in the good
Now I don't know what I believe.

I feel like I'll never understand
The idea of one's appeal
What causes us to hate someone
And think of someone else as 'ideal'

How can we go through our lives
Making decisions every day
When we don't even understand
Why we think this way

Are we simply born this way
Programmed with our opinions
Are we traveling though our lives
Just acting as our emotion's minions

But if that if that truly is case
Then I find it very strange
How at some points in our lives
Our opinions start to change

What causes us to change
What causes this mental shift
Why is it after a certain time
Our old self starts to drift

Do our feelings ever really die?
Can our beliefs so easily sway?
And if our thoughts are what define us
Do our old selves fade away?

What happens when you can't decide
What you think is the right way
Yes, what happens then?
*Maybe we just fade away

Late at night is when I think
And try to I clear my head
I often stay awake all night
Just laying in my bed

As soon as I get comfy
Thoughts start racing in
I start to question everything
and regret my every sin

At first the thoughts are gentle
Like what will I do tomorrow
But as time crawls by; they escalate
Till I'm drowning in my sorrow

I think of all my failures
Every detail of what I did wrong
After hours of reliving pain
I convince myself I don't belong

I suddenly feel isolated
and like the silence will never end
I feel like I will never escape
There's too much I just can't mend

I feel overpowered and worthless
Like I'll never do anything right
I hide till the world fades away
And I'm awoken by the light

I realize a new day has come
It's time to put on a brave face
I put those negative thoughts away
Until I return to this place

There are so many times in life
When we are forced to choose
Do we help someone else win
Even if it means that we lose

For me the choice has been easy
Always fill other people with cheer
Even if the choice hurts me,
It's worth it to remove their tear.

There are times when it gets lonely
Putting others before one's self
There are times when it almost feels
Like I put my own needs on a shelf

While doing all I can for others
I try my best to never complain
But even with my best efforts
It's me that gets left out in the rain

When someone needs a friend
I'm always the one that they call
Then when they are feeling better
I'm ignored; left alone too bawl

I don't regret the things I have done
Because it helped show them I care
But sometimes it'd be nice for me
If somebody could be there

Throughout my entire life
I've been hurt putting others first
But never having the favor returned
...that is definitely the worst.

Hatred is like a fire
And can easily be spread
You let it fill you up inside
Hoping to burn away the dread

At first it feels like it's working
Cuz you're distracted from the pain
But the fire keeps on burning
Becoming difficult to contain

It consumes you from within
Burns everything in its path
Growing stronger every minute
Turning anger into wrath

Before you know what's happening
Hate has filled your core
The fire in you takes over
You think differently than before

You can't hold back your comments
And your actions start to change
You get mean to the people around you
And they all start acting strange

While you were letting hate control you
Everyone else moved on
Now as you try to put out the flames
Everything you had is gone

Surrounded by all the ashes
That you let your anger create
You finally begin to realize
The error of your metal state

The right thing to do is move on
And put your fury in the past
Only when you learn to forgive
Will you feel better at long last

What happened in your life
To fill you with such hate
Why do you have to ruin
Things that could be great

Whenever you open your mouth
One of two things comes out
Stories of how great you are
Or words that create self doubt

You stab people in the back
And you make them feel like crud
And those are just the people
That you can call your 'bud'

It really baffles me to think
That people like you exist
But what shocks me even more
Is how it constantly persists

No matter what you do or say
You're welcomed with open arms
Its as if you've got everyone
Under several of your charms

Why are you so rude and mean
And how come no one else sees
The horribly, ugly true colors.
Of this person they're trying to please