i want to get the message across to you
that i care
but i don't know how

you've been lied to so many times before
i don't know how to make you believe
that this time, it's for real

why are you always ******* yourself up???

i don't understand the appeal,
i don't see what you get out of it

i started caring about you
and now i'm ******
because i know you'll never care about yourself
and me caring isn't enough

blatantly feeding them lies,
and nobody stops them
to think that it would be shameful
to try and stop these people
from overriding these impressionable little children's minds

i want to take you under my wing,
keep you safe

i want to un-teach all of the horrible things
you were taught growing up

i want to give you the love you needed
when you were a little boy
without a home to keep you safe
or parents to hold you close

i want to do all these things for you
but i know it's too late

i know that you're too far gone

there is something magnetic about you
something i wish wasn't there
because i know that it's going to get me in trouble

personally, i don't believe in god.
but i respect,
          sometimes even envy the people who do

i can't imagine
what it would be like
to have such a deep trust in something
something you can always fall back on,
something completely and utterly reliable,
something you can praise or blame
for anything and everything

it must be wonderfully comforting
to think that you have all of those somethings
in this world

i thought you were gone
for good

i was considering what i would do
if you were dead

tried to tell myself you weren't,
and that you were coming back

i wore your pants
hoping that the pants gods would notice,
have mercy,
and bring you home to me