I can't really focus on
What everyone is interested in.
It's black and blue in a chronological way.
It's okay not to understand me,
I Am
sugar and salt mixed together.
You don't need to learn the map of brain
The compass is faced the wrong way
The roads are all dead ends
And you can't even read the directions anyway

I am not someone that you should understand

I'm not waiting on the other person to realize they love me
Don't get me wrong, I'm not afraid to get hurt
I'm not afraid if I say it first
They won't feel the same
I'll be stuck with this loneliness-
Look, it only happened once,
But feeling that pain was better than what I feel on a daily basis.
Nothing, and everything at night.
"How do you know if youre falling for someone?"
I keep hearing it's just supposed to be a feeling
"Do you get upset if they **** someone else?"
If anything, I realize that there's something in my brain
That won't let me feel what I felt for you.

So I never say I love you first,
Because I'd hate to be the first person to lie.

i said it over and over again.
You're too innocent and you don't understand
I'm trying to be patient,
But everything is torn in half
You need to know how people work
When someone returns your things nicely,
Please don't throw their little bit of belongings in the middle of the road
You have friends struggling to find food,
But yet you keep eating all of theirs

You find places to complain in small spaces
Put put faux respect in empty minds.
You're doing it all wrong when someone can see right through.

Its stamped over and over
On my forehead "brave, young, and reckless"
I understand why they think that.
I go at 80 mph speeds on roads that have warning signs
I get it now,
I go swimming in creeks with alligators and snapping turtles
I ride in the back of a truck bed on interstates
I sometimes drink for days in a row

I even go as far as to not wear coats in the cold

I run and lay in the middle of the road in the dark with my people

But I'm not trying to prove to anyone that I'm
Brave
Reckless
Invincible
I'm trying to prove to myself I can feel alive.

I've got needles to stitch your wounds
But I'm only making a mess
I didn't mention that I'm no surgeon,
But you trusted me because youve known me for years.
I don't even know CPR but I need to know heart surgery
Because it's an emergency.
Well we will barely make it out alive.

Fall asleep while you have the time.
All my thoughts are dissipating
I have this major problem: I can't decide
Should I wish the best or the worse
For all the people who are cut out of the picture
Frame my state of mind,
Maybe someday I'll figure out
How my tranquility could cause turmoil

Let me confess myself on social media
I gotta explain how,
I make hints all the time on Twitter.
Shooting out tweets with song lyrics and
Saying how caught up with you I still I am...
Oh yeah, that conversation we had about half a year ago
About what could've been almost two years ago...
Im secretly trying to avoid going to deep in to this.
Facebook told me my soulmate name begins with a
Ready? "m"
I wanted to begin with you.
I'm beginning to think that all the relationship I've had
Don't work out because of you.
You're too big in my life.
But you've got a good thing going for you,
And that's all that matters