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 Jun 2013 Whitney
Jaimee Michelle
I hate you
I hate how I hate you
I hate how you talk
I hate what you say
I hate that nothing you do is true
I hate that you hide
I hate that you just lie
I hate how you looked right in my face
I hate how easily the lies left your lips
I hate how I can't hold back tears inside
I hate letting you see me cry
I hate that I stand there and just nod
I hate how you just get away with it all
I hate that you show no remorse
I hate that I put my life on hold for someone I didn't even know
I hate that I still miss you
I hate it so much
I hate how I'll say 1000 words and you'll barely say one
I hate how selfish you are
I hate how weak I was
I hate that I didn't just walk away
I hate that I allowed you to let me stay
I hate the tears that fall at night
I hate my regrets floating around my head
I hate how it always ends up something you should've said
I hate being on the mend, just to trip and fall all over again
I hate that I was letting go
I hate that you weren't worth holding onto
I hate that I gave you so much
I hate how much you took away
I hate all the "why's" floating in my head
I hate to know those are words that'll never be said
I hate that I am like this
I hate that I let you in
I hate how you didn't let me out
I hate you for taking my heart for a joy ride
I hate you for just being you
I hate that hate has filled my heart
I hate you for breaking it apart
I hate me for being in denial
I hate that I have to feel this way but, it's the only way the hate will eventually go away
I
 May 2013 Whitney
Skye Applebome
I can't stop smiling
And it's just for today
But I'm happy
and I'd trade almost anything to stay that way.
:D
 May 2013 Whitney
Cadence Musick
adolescence fit him like
hand me down sweaters
with missing buttons
he was always meant
to not fit
into it.
he watched
her graceless fingers
lace up the battered boots
that rose past her calves.
his eyes hugged the curves
her legs like snaking highways
in hot arizona summers
heat lightening
in his heart.
they all knew the sweaters wouldn't fit.
maybe he knew it too.
because the taste of her was
like holy water
and the child he never knew
 May 2013 Whitney
Caroline
Confused
 May 2013 Whitney
Caroline
I am confused.

I wonder,

Who I will love in the future.

Or

I think about

who I have loved before.

*-c.a.
 May 2013 Whitney
Caroline
Beautiful
 May 2013 Whitney
Caroline
Beautiful,
such an overly used word.
How about you call them:
                                                        Stu­nning                       Delicate
                                    Magnificent                 ­   Lovely                    Radiant
                            ­  Enticing                                                       ­                    Exquisite
                           Tantalizing                                                      ­                   Dazzling
                                 Wonderful                                                        ­      Mesmerizing
                                               ­  Alluring                                          Ravishing
                                                          Captiv­ating            Enthralling
                                    ­                                      Enchanting

How about you call them something other than beautiful?

*-c.a.
it's supposed to be a heart, but alas I failed.
 May 2013 Whitney
Caroline
Eat
 May 2013 Whitney
Caroline
Eat
EAT EAT EAT*,
my body screamed.
I know I should,
but I can't.
If I do,
they will laugh.
Who you may ask,
only the voices in my head that I'm desperately trying to impress.

-c.a.
 May 2013 Whitney
sleepyhead
"we're not psychologists, you know"
yeah, but we can pretend
lying under pine, oak + ash

i watched them hold eachother mostly every day
until we felt everything was going to be grand
or at least okay.                            
it felt less and less like a therapy
more like addiction, a prescription, need

nicotine hands, freezing fingertips
whiskey breath + colder lips
 Mar 2013 Whitney
emma joy
save you
 Mar 2013 Whitney
emma joy
i haven't been able to get you off my mind.
not that that's different than any other day,
but i miss you
and i hope you're ok.
sometimes i can feel your pain run through me slightly.
like a wave, sparked by your tears.
and i picture you crying, alone in the world, scared, longing for something for someone,
and that's when i feel it.
i would give anything to make it stop.
to take it away and inflect it on myself.
but then, if we are so connected, and if you do love me as i love you, then you wouldn't be able to escape the pain either.
when you love someone you feel their pain they are going through something you can't save them from
and that kills you inside.
i know there's not much i can do.
and there sure isn't anything i can say.
but, i try to do what you did with me:
hug me and tell me it's all going to be ok.
i didn't believe you. i still don't.
but, your arms around my back felt nice.
 Mar 2013 Whitney
Elaenor Aisling
Youth, my beautiful lie
Forever weaving falsehood’s web
Adding more threads as the years slip by
To cover the frays
Begun by Time
For the work is too delicate to patch.

Death, my painful truth,
You watch my futile fiction grow
Waiting till you can cut
The tapestry from the loom
Your scythe sharpened,
Waiting,
To bring me into veracity.
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