A whirlwind of emotions -
I'm feeling cold,
I'm feeling warm,
Maybe it's the insomnia talking,
But all I want right now,
Is a cyclone -
A whirlpool that takes us both away,
To a quiet place,
Where it's only you and me,
While we're young and wild and free

Are you doing what I did?
Are you ignoring today,
Dreaming about a tomorrow,
That may never see the light of day?

It's funny just today,
You asked me, "you're an expert in picking dark chocolate, right?"
I guess I am the master of everything bitter,
And to you, it is starting to show

There's a dead man lying on the street,
Don't wake him,
Cars have driven over him,
Don't shake him,
Vultures have picked on him,
Don't feed him,
Moss has grown on him,
Don't knead him,
Rodents have stripped off his skin,
Don't clothe him,
Fate has done undone him,
Don't loathe him

My words spoke,
My actions spoke,
Deafness was your choice

You're testing my patience, you're testing my will,
You know I've fought hard, and I shall still  

I didn't question your motives, until I had no choice,
Why do you want to me to lose my faith, why don't you hear my voice?  

It's never been an equal world, there are ups and downs for all,
Had a share of highs, but lately into nothingness, it's a free fall  

Existence as a tree, is not what you could have possibly planned for me,
Then why am I a listless vacuum, with nothing pouring in or out of me  

If this is as good as it's gonna get, then take it away at once,
Keep those souls I love happy, And to see you, let me have a chance

Our problem was, very different tastes
Mine was terrific, I mean look at him
His was abysmal, I can't even look at *her

You have always been loved deeply and widely,

I was never loved widely, but I was more than content with the depth of your love,

I loved you beyond the depths of the ocean, but for you, the width of the sky wasn't enough

On the menu tonight,
You have some,
You serve some

The magician loses his power,
When you learn his tricks

Bathing in your sunshine,
I mistook myself for the moon,
I'm a sun too, with a blinding light of my own

So now, I declare a finality,
I am finally done.
Done trying to please you,
Done attempting to be part of your glorious life,
Done putting you before me.

But for all that you've shown me, beautiful angel,
I'll never be done with three things:
I'll never be done praying for you,
I'll never be done thinking about you,
I'll never be done wanting you.
In silence.

But to keep a morsel of myself intact,
And to grow it into all that I could be,
With you, I'm done

I don't think I can take it much longer,
I did think I was a little stronger,
But this warped world, and its warped inhabitants,
Have left me dumbfounded,
Running behind immaterial materiality,
Leaving behind priceless pursuits,
Seems I am trapped,
Doomed to be here,
With no room for my overwhelming fear,
Already left behind all that counts for anything,
Only to count all these countable things,
I know this doesn't make much sense,
But this is reality with no pretense,
If I could, and I wish I could,
I'd end it now, gladly,
Sadly, our beginnings and endings are never ours alone

Don't tell me it's gonna be a good day,
Don't say that now,
Don't tell me to be happy,
And don't give me ideas how

Don't give me hope,
Don't sell my dreams to me,
Don't tell me it'll be alright,
And don't tell me you see

Don't tell me it could be worse,
Don't remind me of how it was,
Don't admire my strength,
And don't give my courage applause

Don't let me love you,
Don't make me hold on,
Don't make an oasis out of you,
And don't, please don't, be gone

Disparity is a sad thing,
While one kid is forced to eat,
Another is forced to find leftovers to fill his vacuum stomach,
While one refuses to study,
Another longs a book, or probably doesn't know what it is,
And this breaks my heart and makes me cry,
And I tell myself to stop being so ******* sensitive

It's hard to understand,
Where exactly we stand,
Feel the ground beneath... shaking,
Somewhere, something... breaking,
It has happened in the past,
Before you were around,
It's happening again,
With a louder, deafening sound
Do you feel it?
Does it scare you?
Let's talk,
Let me prepare you

The sky is full of stars;
You made one person your moon;
The moon is bound to eclipse

That's the thing about words,
To some they mean the depth of the ocean,
To others they're the emptiness of conch shells,
Merely manifesting ocean sounds

The seas could freeze,
The mountain caps could melt,
Who knows how the world could end?
Except for the love lost -
The world ends every night,
And begins again every morning

All the detours,
All the turns, of fate,
and of this confused mind,
Led me to you,
And will always lead back to you,
here on,
Even if I wanted to,
There's no turning away,
You are engrained in this skin,
And in this half soul

In your highs and your lows,
Your happiness and your despair,
Your brilliance and your confusion,
Your purity and your sin,
Your dark and your bright,
Your sunshine days and desperate nights,
I want you in your all,
I want your entirety

A vacuum inside the chest,
I feel everything ****** into it,
Depression, that's what they call it,
I'm not sure this is what it is,
I'll visit a shrink,
Maybe that'll help,
Maybe there will be a label to this,
Because that's all anyone seems to look for,
I've never cared for labels,
So it's fine if shrinky can't figure one,
But something to fill up the void,
Just something,
To feed the vacuum,
Will help

There is only so much I can do from the outside,
Your life is yours alone, as much as I'd like to think we share it,
We don't

You smile and laugh, put on a show,
Sometimes I laugh along,
That's the only chance you won't let me go

These barricades and fences,
Put up around your heart,
I can see through them!
But can't tear them apart

In a bulletproof vest,
I'll fight with you
And one day, a long time away,
We will see this through

It has two kinds,
One, does not end - a perennial wait for you;
One, bound in a moment - wrapped in your embrace

I'd take a bullet for you,
So go ahead, shoot

The sun, the moon, the stars,
The cuts, the calluses, the scars

The strength, the fear, the trust,
The mind, the soul, the stardust

The inspiration, the love, the friend,
The rope, the fray, the amend

Everything together found in few,
My everything and more,*  *you

12am
All these crazy thoughts,
Present through the day, just undistracted right now










And I hear you breathe, sleeping next to me,
And everything is okay

There is an odd serenity in his eyes,
It's my own version of paradise

White noise et al,
In a moment I won’t know you, and you won’t know me,
Time and its arbitrary hinges,
Fate and its random decisions,
Led us to becoming family,
And until blood flows through these mortal veins,
I will love the whole of you,
I will be grateful

Farewell, my love
I'm coming to question why you were sent into my monochrome life,
To fill it with breathtaking colours?
That eventually took my breath away -
Alas,
It's time to set you free,
It's time to set me free,
I can't say goodbye;
So farewell, my love

You're going to warm me up,
Or burn me down

We were more than friends,

Then we were less than friends,

And now we're finally *friends

What should I tell you,
That I haven't already?

What I should I give you,
That you don't have already?

Guardian of my sanity,
I have lost everything to you,

What a great loss I've had,
For I've finally found you,

I have nothing left,
No abundance to offer you from,

I am but an empty pitcher,
I hope you will drink from

The carcass was made to wait,
For nobody wanted to light the pyre

I fought long, and I fought hard,
But deep lodged was the glass shard

It tore the three layers of my dermis, broke a vein too,
And when I finally pulled it out, it looked a lot like you

This love you give me, I deserve not,
These hands you extend,  but I've never caught

You give your all,  I only seem to take,
You catch me when I fall, when you should just let me break

I'm a vacuum, I'll only pull you in more deep,
I'm nothing at all, for me, don't ever weep

As a wave lives for a moment, still causes a stir in the sea,
I'm a passing moment's laughter,  forever can't count on me

You think it's a storm, and I'll rise above some day,
But I'm its eye, I'm the black, not the grey

I'll make you debris, collateral damage is what they'll say,
Here's your out, leave me, I'm a monster, you shouldn't stay

If you want to say it,
Say it.
If you want to do it,
Do it.
If you want to be it,
Be it.
If you want to give it,
Give it.
If you want to write it,
Write it

Life's too short,
Shorter than your next breath,
Don't waste it
Take a minute,
Ponder,
If the world ended tonight,
Would you die a content being?,
If not, are you doing all that you can to change it?
Do it.
Everything else, is up to Him.
And if you're looking for a sign,
*Here it is.

Gold has a high melting point,
It can take on a lot,
That's one of the reasons for its value,
You my love, with a heart of gold,
*Are put through all these trials,
Because of your stupendous resilience,
No, I am not happy about it either,
I'd rather have my strength tested,
And just because you can endure something,
You should not have to,
No, you should not,
But I cannot change this reality,
And I cannot ignore the fact,
That you have a survivorship record of 100%,
After everything that has been mercilessly thrown your way,
You stand tall, my gorgeous love
So I am placing my trust in you,
To win this battle,
And I will believe with every ounce of faith in me,
This is the last of the war,
Lasting happiness is on its way

I wrote you a lullaby, listen,
Go to sleep, my dear,
Tomorrow's another day,
Another fight,
I just want you to sleep well tonight,
I'll softly sing you a song,
I know it won't right any wrong,
Maybe it'll comfort your dreams,
I'll work my hand through your hair,
Fall asleep,
For a few hours, have no care,
Close those eyes now, I'm always near,
And when morning comes,
I'll still be here

I kept apologising,
I didn't know for what exactly,
I kept saying I was sorry,
I felt I'd wronged you,
I'm not sure how,
But I'm sure I had,
So I kept apologising,
You were angry at me,
You refused to tell me over what exactly,
Maybe you didn't know either...
So there I was,
Sorry
And there you were,
Angry
And here we both are,
Relentless

I was never good at loving from a distance,
If that's my fault,
I'm guilty as charged

At the desperate hour,
Nothing can matter
When the brakes are being pulled,
But you've already accelerated beyond control
Who will you pray to?
When your God is laughing in your face;
Crying at his reality;
Damning your efforts
Irrespective of intent,
You fueled the fire you wanted put out
What will you do then?

You speak to them like they're ****,
Address them with adjectives I wouldn't like to take,
Mock their misery, and laugh at their pain,
Act like you're their God,
When really all you are is vain,
And I wouldn't care,
Except fate has me associated with you,
Which is more of a shame than pride, most times,
And I'm a little more sensitive to people's emotions than your self centered, ugly heart ever could be,
I'd correct you, teach you right from wrong,
But I'm afraid you're going to sing your own song,
And fanned with my disgust,
Be even more rude to them,
The only thing you are capable of.
*******.

How are you?
I'm good. What about you?
Fantastic

How was your day?
Not so great. Yours?
Oh I've seen better

How's it going?
Pretty well actually, how about you?
Never better

Do you see?
I ask about you,
So that I know about me
And you thought you're being pathetic!