A tiger just walked into my room
I stop breathing
It walks casually around the perimeter, investigating, unfazed by my presence
I don’t think its noticed me
I’m motionless, silent but the fear inside me is deafening
I hope the tiger can’t hear my fear
It’s purrs sound safe but they are interrupted by an occasional low lazy growl of undecided and perhaps ill intent
My mouth is so dry it burns but the drink on the table before me seems a million miles away right now
I watch the tiger intently as it passes me on its way to survey the bedroom
The tiger does not acknowledge me as it passes, perhaps it hasn’t seen me
I hope it has eaten
It brushes past my arm as it reenters the room and my muscles lock in tension,
The tigers body felt warm
I notice how beautiful, how majestic, its head suddenly turns to me as if to acknowledge the compliment of my thought
Don’t think! Idiot! it can hear your thoughts
I gulp…. it’s staring right at me now
The tiger has seen me, that’s it… I’m done for
It looks at me, into me, deep down inside, tasting my soul to see if its something that may suffice as a snack until dinner
I hope my soul tastes bitter
The tiger slowly approaches, its eyes fixed to mine
I can’t run, even if I could I’d never make it to the door
Please let my soul taste bitter
So this is how it ends, I end
In these closing seconds I try to make my peace with the world, myself
I surrender to my fate of teeth and claws
I surrender
Hmmm, surrender feels ok actually
I let go, my muscles let go, the deafening tension dissolves and calm fills me
I hope my soul tastes sweet
Please let my soul taste sweet, at least that, let my last achievement be a decent meal
The tigers face touches mine, it sniffs me and exhales, breath humid and warm like the jungle
I say goodbye to myself
I close my eyes and welcome its teeth to take me
I’m at peace, I am peace
But moments pass
And moments more
Yet I’m not eaten
My eyes open to see the tiger laying down by my feet
I’m perplexed
I finally exhale
I am saved! I am safe! shhhhh! Stop thinking so loudly
This tiger has mercy for me
Perhaps it likes me, perhaps we could be friends
Pretty cool to roll up somewhere with a tiger in tow
The tiger reaches out and places a very heavy paw on top of my foot, pinning me effortlessly to the floor
Looks like I’m going nowhere
I hope my soul tastes bitter
Please let my soul taste bitter
a poem about episodes of reoccurring anxiety