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this thin veneer
i hide behind
is broken
but for a question
as to it

not that anyone
cares to make anyone else,
uncomfortable,
asking what's real
scour the score
the poetry that liters
from hearts forlorn
imagining
you're reaching out to me
in disguise
an angel weeps
having fooled even herself
in thinking she had fallen from
i am a hard man to love
not taken to it easily
and falling out of it,
just as difficult
scrolling
past things that mean nothing
and do nothing
in the ways and means
of entertainment or pleasure
or even interest
and all food is gruel
tasteless, mealy gruel
i have meaning
i know myself
i know what i'm working toward
but what good does that do
for bills
for positions still out of my reach
simply by merit, or connection
competent, and true to a fault
smart?
i can't figure anyone else out though
i don't want this
choking down *****
why do you make me feel like this
i don't want to part
i don't want to say goodbye
but you don't want
to be apart of my life
it was easier
as kids
i didn't let
my mind get overrun
with what could be
but not now
when we can be
but it's me
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