Is apathy
ever free
civil war
in the bar
drunks fight
for the right
take a stand
**** the band
bury the hate
never too late
bury our dead
drink instead.

I steal what I need.
    The sun and moon and
    your heart and stars
    time and beauty and
    God's grandiose plans.
    I'll build a universe.
    We'll be the King and
    Queen. We steal dreams.

I've used substances to balance my tilt.
     Smokes, beer, wine, vallium and xanax.
     They've helped me to stay in the lines.
     I chose to ignore the rules and live on
     a pinball machine with frenetic energy.
     All I want is a drug to bring me down
     to this earth where I began the journey.
     Please take these cravings from my mind.
     The Chemists come up with carnival rides.
     Up and down and everywhere in between,
     Coney Island madness in their tiny pills.
     Bring me back from this life on Mars.

I'm  planted into this sacred ground
one last time 'til I'm buried and blessed.
The priest sprinkles holy water on my grave
with a prayer I'll carry like a card to God
to the Gate of Heaven and ask for mercy
as I'm judged for my faults and kindness.

You finally bombed my Pedestal,
    blew it to smithereens. Suicide
    since you were perched upon it
    the longest time. Passion doused.

    What use do I have for this flaccid love?
    This mocking, broken sword has
    captured its final flower. I love you
    differently now. Loveless marriage.

I can't not desire
my heart on fire
for your perfume
permeates the room
I'll stalk you tonight
just a perfect flight
always arrives on time
bar stool next to mine.

The ice rattles in my glass as my
hands tremble needing another sip.
I'm calm and forget the terrible times.
We're all beat, spat upon, sentenced.
I drink too much of Christ's blood.
I'm fraught with devotion, nail myself
to your cross, losing my mind. I pray.
I don't think I can wait that long.

Rockefeller was a villain
back in the olden times
until he gave away all of
his pockets full of dimes.
A gentle kind old man frail,
caring, generous to a fault
sold his soul on newsreels
to an adoring sheep like cult.

Our desires for Eden's apple,
promises of every knowledge
brought me to this ugly place
froze on this building's ledge.

Never satisfied by just living
tormented by my carnal needs
I could never fix her wound.
It never heals, always bleeds.

Our souls bright light
in sin's darkest night
expose our true delight
as death takes it flight.

Furious flash of His anger
puts the fear of God in us.
We hope magic beads and chants
will save us from the ignorance.
Science will explain it all away.
The planets spin madly around
our sun and we eat dinner and the
wine doesn't spill in ocean waves?
We are frozen in our life frame to
frame while everything around
us is complete chaos in dreams
that we can never understand.

Hey die on the cross Jesus
did you think to please us?
Being nailed to heavy wood,
were you just misunderstood?
Bring us to the eternal light
of the darkness of our night.

You say you love me
will you dive to the
bottom of my soul
collect ugliest sins
bury them forever
in the potter's field
of my broken heart
and lie next to me?

He's dying in his bed above his bar.
    The jukebox plays soundtracks
    of life and people live out loud
    drinking and laughing in fierce
    lives below. Life on fire!
Sharks circle his lifetime
where the sun don't shine.
He dies smiling above it all.

I'm belligerent and lazy
unkempt and very crazy.
I'll die trying to rhyme
serving my prison time.
Break my poem to pieces
nailed to a cross like Jesus.
Bloodless corpse alive again
forgive poets our mortal sin.

I work the streets at night
dressed for business in cars.
I do my best to look pretty.
Makeup hides my scars.
They always pay in cash.
They hate perfume's scent.
We never kiss goodnight.
It's what I do for rent.

Death is the forever
no clocks or never.
No pesky calendar
no future or past
no appointments
no nagging or
disappointments
forever no more.

I'm riding razor edge of my mind
kids and a fat wife I left behind
then I fell in love with the others
biology chemistry bookmark lovers.
Guilt will never set lovers free
keep us in public squares in pillory.
Nothing is at first glance as it seems.
I will always chase my broken dreams.

I have a poet's vision
rhyme your flaws
with laser precision.
Many poets have claws.
Suckle poem's milk
it means everything.
Just wear your **** silk,
careful what you bring.

75 and moving to last page
time to clear an empty nest
just accept the final stage
then  throw away the rest.

Dumpster in the driveway
collects my broken dreams
books bought never read
nothing as it ever seems.

Guitars and keyboards tossed
lyrics forgotten as stutters
all my words are dead lost
poems die in wet gutters.

Years have let it all play out.
  Many actors  the same worn line.
  The parts don't change that much.
  I'm homesick for every piece of time.

God's first heartbeat in His womb
of universe's certain fiery start
an instant I lived my giant life
forgotten with my stillborn  heart.

Oklahoma dust drove us west to California
  where jobs and green fields promised Eden.
  We piled our lives on the Ford and headed
  to Paradise. We joined others on the way
  a caravan of proud Okies would do anything
  to survive. Some did the unspoken for food
  and shelter along the way. Eyes wide open
  we could smell the sweet winds of Paradise.

No need to be alone
call me on the phone
pay a temporary loan
buy my love to moan
always time to atone
the bleeding of bone

We all hurt at last
sins outrun our past
party over too fast
the gun a final blast
blood in rain a mask
know better than ask.

Beauty turns tricks
at the Motel 6
to buy her fix
a magical mix
to keep her blind
and keep her mind.
She feeds her beast
to enjoy her feast.

Youth's ignorance neglects
grey old men and kissing
women nursed their parents
1930 yearbook is missing.
Listen as they whisper a
warning to live for today
for tomorrow we all die.
Class pictures on display.

I met you in the bar and
I'll wander through the pages
of your life as you do mine.
Our secrets are well hidden
in crevices never found.
Only years reveal truths
as trust erodes fears and I
know you won't leave me.

4 English singers were
killed in a crosswalk
on Abbey Road today.
A double Decker bus
ran them down on
26 September 1969.

Just be my breath and heartbeat for a start.
   Be stories that tore beautiful through my heart.
   Every lust that ever brought me to an end,
   the absolute to my doubt, straight to my bend.
   Be my broken vows and promises forgiven.
   Be my gentle ending when I'm done livin'.

Love is splendid!
Love is never ended.
Lust soars above
mocking her love.

Disappearing magician
  I lose myself in a crowd.
  We wake in a bed of roses
  naked, screams upon a cloud.
  You were always Aphrodite
  just out of reach fantasy
  love is lusts faded shadow
  never noticed we let it be.

There must be someway out of here
   said the patient to the shrink.
   I can write a script for ******
   that might help you think.
   Give me your magic I said
   maybe I'll find another door.
   Don't be in such a hurry
   just be grateful for the floor.
   I'll need to see you often
   you're in a fragile mind.
   I'll write your script forever
   as long as you stay blind.

There's anger
in the chamber
no love lost
with a stranger
remind me to keep
track of every sin:
I'm trying
I'm lying
I'm crying
I'm spying
I'm flying off
the handle again.

It's a burden being a poet.
   Eating the pain of others
   sparing suffering ****
   for sisters and brothers.

We siblings gathered for a last minute
  living on borrowed time. The eight originals
  in various stages of health in a grand hotel.
  In the harbor of Baltimore where seagulls
  keep looking for the ocean and the affluent
  fear the poor. We don't carry cash anymore.
  Patty. Jeanie. BJ. Kevin. Eileen. Terry.
  Bridget. Noreen. I write this as a love letter
  to my siblings as our sun's going down and
  we pass the living on to the next generation.
  We share war stories and our afflictions.
  We laugh at our past and wonder at tomorrows.
  We set aside our spats and hold dear our love.

Satan drove the church van
into the belly of the beast
Las Vegas sin city stays there
God's light doesn't shine here

I study my skin stretched on bone
And realize I never felt so alone
paralyzed by John Barlycorn
drunk and full of empty storm.

I met her at the ice machine
both of us lived in between
heaven and hell after all
to her room for the fall.

When my turn comes
I'll disappear like those
before me. I won't ask
why I must disappear.
There's a reason for it
I'm sure. She said so.

Who owns my epiphany?
  Is you or is it me?
  I broke the machine
  left my part unclean
  blood or oil dried
  gears and cranks died
  screeched to a halt.
  Blame the Gestalt.

I want to Howl like Ginsberg.
  Shock you with the ugly truths
  slap your face with my ****.
  I want to be arrested like
  Lenny Bruce for blue comedy.
  Ride the rails and be a Beat Poet
  while I wring every ounce out.
  I want to suffer 'til I can puke
  it onto the page at 3 am and
  ring your bell and hold on
  all night and wake sane again.
I seek truth in needles. I Howl!

Playing with toys and jealously.
Now you spit me out in anger
no more games. No more friendly.
I feel the heat. I sense a danger.
I hear your rattle before a bite
venom saved just for me after all
I offer my vein to take your spite
pride a haughty spirit before a fall.

I saw a flying machine
over our Kansas corn and
knew where I belonged.
In the sky in heavens
life can be a travelogue.
Fly around Earth into
oblivion proving myself
until I went missing...

I'm cleared for flight
   another anxious night
   terrified of the height
   and pain of a slight
   you stole my libido
   while we danced a Tango
   at closing you said no
   I died in love's rodeo.

Screen door screams in summer heat
  just calling crows to come and meet
  and gather for a final time to end
  your family and your best friend.
  We die in broke war running away
  from treason in DC nothing to say.
  Mikie sold worthless soul for gold
  to a government of filthy mold.

Mad science was my forte.
I brewed the pandemic
that shook the world
into meek submission.
I have another trick
in my petri dish.

Eric Fromm said it in a book.
I see you in a bar and you steal
my breath I know God's not Love
you are Love and we create God's
tiny sparks of life in fierce beds.
first comes love then comes marriage

Clocks count our fleeting time
ticking our numbered heartbeats
as we die in forgotten seconds
calendars so full of life's defeats.

Santa comes overnight and leaves stuff.
Sleep. Dream of toys and candy canes.
Tomorrow never seems to come.
We barely sleep and meet at 4 am.
We kids gather at the top of the stair to strategize.
5 am we send a soldier to wake mom and dad.
They are defeated and beg for 10 minutes.
In 20 minutes the living room has erupted
in Xmas. Wrapping paper and ribbons
have adorned this happy home.
It's as close to perfect we'll know.
Outside the window falls the snow.

I sit on the curb at the liquor store
until 9 am when it finally serves,
wait for desperate beauty queen.
I talk smooth settle her nerves.
We share a bottle and queen bed
*** was just a lost cause at best.
I sit on the curb at the liquor store
until 9 am when it finally serves.

Seagulls argue over who knows what
   riding ocean breezes we'd all die for.
   We fight drunk in our room, a prelude
   to ******* on the sheets with anchors.
   I hear the 9th symphony when we mend.
   We lie as one and hear the seagulls laugh.

My brother who let me climb
upon his back to save myself.
It's a debt I can never repay.
If you needed a liver I'd give
you mine but you'd not want it
knowing I needed yours anyway.

pretty lies and ugly truths
take your card from the deck
offers only sleight of hand
and a rope around your neck.