She only wished to be cared for by one person,
He saw her only for her body.
She hoped for a loving relationship,
His goal was to play her until he got sick of the game.
She learned not to trust again,
While he moved on without a scratch.

Hold me tight; please don’t ever let me go.
Tell me stories while I fall asleep on you.
Let me love you until my love runs out.
There may only be a few moments while were together until it’s time to leave again.
I will cherish every second of every minute spent together.
Let me love you until your heart can’t take it anymore.

I’m sorry you love a damaged heart,
I only know two sides to a story, either heartfelt or torture.
It’s hard to put down my shields that’s been guarding me for years.
I’m sorry I’m the one you wanted,
It’s not too late to walk out.

I’m sorry you love me,
Still learning how to accept this.
I fear what love can do to a couple.
Promise me no matter what, you’ll never use my love against me.

My weakness is myself,
Afraid to disappoint the voice that begs for more.
The thoughts used to never end,
Only way to shut them up was to listen.
My weakness was myself,
I knew how to cause pain better than anyone.

I think of him.
Waiting for a second chance to prove I wasn't a waste of memories.
I close my eyes hoping to run into him.
All I hear is it's time for me to go.
My heart Shutters all over again.
I think of him before feeling kicks in.
Before everything changed.

When his hands are on mine, I slowly melt in the arms around me.
My voice starts to fade, He holds me tighter to reassure me I'm safe.
When his hands are on mine, I feel the time has paused.
He brings out a part of me that I hid away afraid of getting hurt again.

Ever since I was a child, snow has always brought a smile to my face.
Now when he's with me, it all feels the same.
It doesn't matter what is going on; I know he cares about me too.
I would give up winter to spend the rest of my days in his arms.
Snow always gave me the missing piece,
With him near, my heart is complete.

I missed you.
Then all the memories came rushing through my head.
I realized I only missed the thought of you.
When you came back all the hate I forgot about was there again.
I missed you.
Then I remember how much pain you leave behind.
I realized I only wanted what I didn't have.

Love has two sides,
The sweet, dreamy, and storytelling.
Or the evil that hides between every forced smile holding back treats, hoping no one around them notices their pain.
Growing up, I saw both sides.
Hoping one day I will find my long-lost prince.
Slightly feared the other type would find its way to me.
Love has two sides, one we all dream of or the nightmare we fear.

Why did I give my heart away?
I thought this time it would be a different story to tell.
The type that ends with smiles instead of tears.
The one where everyone wins,
but this isn't that type of story.
Instead, one person lost all their heart and gained broken trust.
I gave my heart away, hoping for a different type of ending.

Please don't break my heart,
I know fairy tales don't exist for people like me.
The love will fade. It always does,
Not for me, though. I will be stuck on him for as long as my heart lets me.
I love him,
Though Young love rarely makes it to the finish ends.
If the day ever comes when he's not in my life, I know it will be for good reasons.
Please don't leave my side until there is no other choice.

I love you, that's it.
Let the whole world listen while I scream as loud as my body lets me.
I love you
Everything else is gone when you are next to me.
I love you
The time that is taken is given back to me when you are in my arms.
I love you
Never will I want to stop saying these three words.
I love you.
Even when I'm confused about everything else, I know how I feel about you.

The day my light starts to fade.
I look towards the window waiting for the storm to take over my mind.
From the moment of the rain pouring to the last drop, my body is frozen from the darkness.
Never worried about the next moment instead focused on the movie that is playing right in front of my eyes.
The rain saved me once before it will do it again.

Please don't go.
If you leave me, give me the closure I will search for until my heart is whole.
When my heart breaks from the pain, will you pick me up one last time?
When you decide to leave to me in the past.
Promise I will be the last girl you will ever break this badly.

She gave him all her love,
Only for him to take her heart for years then ruin her trust in the end.
He saw someone easy to take control of, which set his never-ending plan in motion.
She had love in her eyes until he took everything the poor women had.
He made her believe it was all her head; that's why she stayed to the end.
The day it ended was the day she had no more for him to steal.
All the trust and hopeless feelings ruin out.

I never thought someone had this in them to tear one's heart this badly.
My body is still healing after years of broken promises and empty emotions.
He treated me like I was special,
Only to be thrown out moments later.
I never thought I would regret loving someone until I met them.
Thoughts run through my head until I get high enough for them to disappear.
The dreams I had turned into dust when his hand touched my lonely heart.

Will this be my fairy tale?
I hold on tight to the slight hope that lingers.
When he says goodbye, I wonder if this time he means forever.
I wonder if this will be my fairy tale or the start of my never-ending heart break.
Will all his love give me enough trust not to be worried for the future?
It's not his fault that he picked a damaged heart to love.

She wrote her love story out when she was only fifteen.
Waiting for the guy she wrote about years ago,
She never found Anyone close until she met you.
You gave her all she ever dreamed about just to take it all back.
She used to smile at your text and she cries in pain reading it back.
She wished for the day you would say I love you.
Those words never came.
She wrote her love story,
Only to meet you the one who made her stop believing in happily ever after.

Why did he stop caring for me?
I was told every day that it would never fade.
The day it stopped was the day I never looked at him the same.
Why did he break the one promise he ever told.
I thought I was enough until I heard the way he talked about his “friend.”
His smile got more extensive, and his stories kept changing.
I never made him pick, but if I did, I know who he would choose.
Why was she better than me?

Does he think of me?
When we are apart, does he wants all of me or dread coming home.
The smile is probably a mask to hide his pain.
He says he wants me,
His eyes tell a different story.
The Look says he is thinking of a way to leave.
Does he think of me or the boy he wishes I could be?
Please tell me how you really feel.
I can't be someone who wants to be anywhere else but home.

Give me a chance,
I swear it will be worth it.
My love is as strong as the truth I have in him.
My love will last longer than anything he ever wants.
Give me a chance,
I promise it won't go to waste.
I'll be there whenever I hear your pain over the phone.
No matter the time, I will be over before the call ends.
Give me a chance,
I swear it will be worth it.

Sit still,
Listen closely.
Try hard not to be heard or seen.
Instead, wait for the appropriate time to explain how your body isn't your body.
Left your right arm and watch it drop.
Move it fast in front of your eyes to double-check that you are, in fact, not ok.
Sit back down and hope it passes faster this time.
When it's over,
Know it's never really ever going to be over.

I love you.
Watch me scream it to the top of the world.
No one will miss it.
I will hold you tight until I can't anymore.
When you're cold, I will give you my sweater to warm you up.
My ear is only one call away to listen to anything that's on your mind.
I love you.
That's one thing that won't ever change as long as we're together.
I love you.
The three words that make or break a relationship.
I stand here tonight offering you my love
Will you decline or take it off of me?

When love comes to my door.
Would I let him in or turn his body away so I can’t be broken later.
He stands a few feet away with a smile and open arms.
I want him to come closer to hold my body.
I’m nervous about giving someone my young heart to keep in this hand.
When he comes knocking on my door I will give my love in return for his.

When they start to scream, my body starts to freeze.
I go back to when I was fourteen, afraid to step in.
Tuning the music up to tune the yelling out,
Hoping it ends better than the last one.
In the present moment,
I beg for this to change.
I use my voice to stop this home from turning into a regular house.
They keep hoping one night; their love will grow.
Knowing the true love left right before this all started.

I hold him tight, knowing I'm safe.
He won't let me go,
Instead of hugging me back tighter.
I look up to his smile brighter than the stars at night.
I wondered if I could pause this moment to make it last longer.
If only he knew how much every little moment means to me.
I would give up anything to relive all the memories for the first time again.

I'm falling hard,
I hope he is there to catch me.
He leaves me speechless,
My heart starts to race.
My smile can't hide when he's in the room.
I feel like I'm dreaming when he looks over.
If this falling I hope I never stop.

I wish he could see himself through her younger eyes.
How broken his little girl was from the words he used as bullets.
Hoping to be invisible in his eyes,
Then he couldn't hurt her with his twistest phases.
All she wanted was her father's approval.
When she came out, the bond was broken.

I wish I wasn’t born trans,
Then maybe I would love my bare body instead of putting my hands over the chest that didn’t ask to be there.
Wishing the hands would turn my chest into the flat board that I desire.
Hoping one day this will be in my deepest of memories,
Maybe In that other life I would have wanted to share my body with my eyes open.
When i say I wish I wasn’t trans,
I mean I wish I didn’t smile more when thinking of getting parts of myself removed.
I mean I wish I got the easy way
I mean I wish
I wish I loved myself how everyone else loved me growing up.

I have a love-hate relationship with him.
It's getting really controlling fast.
If I start to smile,
He must steal the happiness away.
When I'm feeling set, he reminds me of my past.
Knowing all my confidence will disappear,
Then I would give him my attention again.
I tried to leave him a few times, but I always found my way back.

I don't want to fall again,
I'm not afraid of falling in love.
I'm scared to lose someone close.
All the memories will slowly disappear,
When I fall, will you promise to let me down easy?
I want to remember the good.

Trauma is funny like that…
The best jokes come from it,
Hiding the pain that lives underneath the laughs.
Trying hard to remember the lost childhood,
Wondering why it's so blurry.
Trauma is funny like that...
It's a wild card that will come out at any time.
Giving us endless stories to tell,
Hoping not to scare anyone off all the damage.

Freeze.
I stand still, waiting for a single whisper.
If I move,
Will everything good disappear?
Holding onto the memories that help me stay quite
Wondering if this moment will ever pass.

I think I'm falling,
Today we both got teary for each other.
All the happy memories are getting too real,
I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I think I'm falling for him,
His looks say the same.
I hope I never wake up if I'm dreaming.

When I compare my parents to a cloud this is what I mean.
They can go from beautiful to deadly within minutes.
A warning spreads as soon as there is a chance of it coming.
No one says a word each trying to protect them selfs.
Everyone hopes for the best but fears the worst.
Only one person ever tries to stop them before it gets too late.
I watch the sky for a warning of what will happen next.
Hoping this will be the last of it.

If love was a book,
It would come in many forms.
Starting as the tales, we read at night to chapter books that take months to read.
If love was a book,
I would read it over and over, never wanting to stop hoping it would come true.
Dreaming of the day when I no longer have to read to figure out what it means.
If love was a book,
I would hope I was secretly reading about you.

Fall for me,
I beg at night while I watch his eyes wander.
Wondering why I'm not getting his attention.
Knowing I will always be the second choice waiting to be picked.
Today he forgot about all the little lies and heartbreak that came from his mouth.
I put on a smile and pretended that he really did change.
Knowing that it's an act that will last a day.

Don't get mad.
I say with a nervous giggle,
Never knowing how they respond.
Tip toeing around my own house,
Not wanting to spark a ticking time bomb.
The silence gets louder,
My mind starts to scream.
Please don't get mad.
The only phase I knew in the broken home.
Hoping one day someone will understand why I start to shake when they raise their voice.

Sorry
A word that I use to shield myself from the pain that comes before it.
The thing that shuts down talks before it starts,
Makes tears turn into forgotten messes.
Makes those who love us turn into the deepest monsters.
Thinking when we say the word all is good again.
Not knowing, I hold on to the broken promises that never came.
Faking a smile that wants to fade but knowing they will get mad.
That this will be my fault if I say anything else but what their ears want to hear.
Twenty-one to the eye,
Inside the scared little five-year-old who knew too much for his age.
Sorry for….
Sorry, I didn't mean….
Sorry for it all…

My little heart flutters with butterflies.
It's the way he smiles at me and makes me feel special.
This time it will be different, or that's what I tell myself.
I'm not worried about falling, only for the after the mess of it all.
My little heart flutters with butterflies while my mind worries about how to prepare for the last goodbye.

Please be careful.
I'm similar to legos.
Takes days to put together,
Only seconds break.
If I break, odds are you won't stay to help build me up again.
So instead, you will leave my broken body lying on the floor, saying I'm not worth your time.
I'm similar to a lego set; you want me until they see how long it will be until I'm fixed.

A flower is similar to dating,
Looks super sweet and will last for a long time.
Until the pedals start to slowly disappear, leaving an empty stem.
Then you look for a newer and prettier one,
Hoping this time, it will last longer than the last
Never understanding why it keeps getting old but never giving it attention.

We weren’t perfect; I knew that.
I loved as much as a broken person could.
Trying to change the stories to make me look bad.
I almost trusted those stories more,
Because he told them all the time.
I never will go back to that,
I know my worth, and one will take that.
No matter how pretty they seem to the outside world.

I watched her fall out of love faster than anything else.
The smiles turned into tears.
Late nights went to early goodbyes.
The worst was hearing the pain in her voice when saying I love you for the last time.
That's how I knew it was over.

The man with all the secrets,
Still only cares about himself.
Unless a pretty woman walks across his view.
He will forget all respect and hopes that make her beg for me.
The man will date others to make her jealous.
This will happen until she gives in or he finds someone new to mess with.

The time of the year that shy kids come to shock everyone.
When monsters can be unrestricted,
Everyone else plays pretend.
No one knowing who is real or fake,
The perfect time to make people regret their choice to come out alone.

Stay where you are.
Don't move, or everything will go up in flames.
I wait another minute, hoping this nightmare will go away.
Nothing has changed besides the laughs that turned into wines.
No one knows if we will get out.
Stay where you are, or be ready to fight something you can't see.

The cloudy sky started to crying,
That's when everything around went silent.
I looked for someone, but there was no one near to hear my screams.
The sky started to get darker than it ever had before.
I tried running,
I wasn't fast enough.
The clouds changed to bright red. I knew this meant game over.
Then out of nowhere, everything went back to normal.
My mind was seeing the future all over again.

Even with all the medicine, she still won't leave me alone.
Reminding me one day how the person you like will go any second.
Stop smiling; he doesn't even notice you.
I sit on my floor, trying to think of all the stuff he ever said to me.
The voice gets louder, and it won't turn off.
I sent another text,
She tells me you are driving him away.
I deleted it,
Only to regret it a second later.