There will come a time when life becomes undying
The lion will close his mouth and sleep in his den
The raven and the crow will be silent that day
For lack of prey the wolf will become thinner
For dinner he'll eat herbs and grass
It'll come to pass that the bear will rest with the doe
The flow of the river will quench their thirst
Their stomachs will burst not with food but with joy
And man will no longer employ weapons of war
Their girls and their boys will no longer weep
They will keep their parents close to their hearts
The darts and the bullets will no longer fly
The sky will sing and the earth will know rest
It will bless mankind with the tree of life
Strife will cease and good will be the wine
You and I will dine with our ancestors of old
This story is told and written, it is coming and sure
For those who endured through this fallen time
With hearts that remained pure

There are certain corners in my mind I can't go
Memories of the past distorted and concrete
When I try to open my mind
To let love inside me
They pop up
Obstructing

I run, dash and dodge around these memories
I try to focus on the good times
As hard as I try I can't forget
And if I try to face them
I get eaten alive
Then spat out

They say I should leave the past behind and move on
That I should have more compassion on myself
But it's the way I am and can't change
Some scars are simply eternal
And won't go away
Until the end

I have stepped away from pride
And exposed my flaws
Revealed my thoughts
Retracted my claws
Some see that and pounce
Go in for the ****
Not an ounce of respect
To humiliate me at will
I wish you would remain flaccid
At the sight of my kindness
And retract the member
Where your sacral chakra is
I have softened my heart
Mushy and red
Not for you to tear apart
Until I am dead
But for you to learn
That you are naked as well
Unless you turn
Your life will be story I tell
While I sit in heaven
And you burn in hell

I cast the distractions aside and begin a process
Of untwisting the ball of tangled thoughts
Can't sleep, it's gotten late
Just want to think straight

I'm so very mad at the world
I hurt myself today
I nearly coughed out a lung and hurled
From smoking and drinking to feel ok

How come the wrong people stick in the human mind?
How come bad events, most unkind circumstances float in the head, while the good is well hidden, difficult to find?
Why is it so hard to rest, sleep and properly unwind?

I'm in for it now, she's in my head
I can't make bread, thinking of lead
Through her brain, I wish she was dead
Things like this better left unsaid

There are many people who hurt me but I don't want revenge
I'm not deranged, I just want them to feel remorse
I'm venting, it'll come in due course
For now I must be patient

It's probably best to not start,
you'll feel better if you just sit your **** down
they say
but to me,
that's when the demons come
and that's when you have to start again

The closest thing I know to heaven is inside me
But I can't open my heart to just anyone
They'll betray me
I dance and sing in my mind
On the outside a cold demeanour
I'm happy but it never shows

And they tell me to quit
But my fate has been written
There is no deviation
I go where the wind takes me
For I have no say in what's true
I see what I see, and that's that

You can see it in his eyes, his lips, face
When he leave a person, a place
He doesn't know how to mask it, he must be careful
who he lets into his space
Everywhere he goes, he leaves a trace
Emotions rub off on others
And he's a disgrace

Broken and dead
put him in a box
Bury him six feet deep
Cover him with rocks
Let him sleep
Among stopped clocks
Such is their wish, though death never knocks

He has been dropped from a height
He appears to have flopped
Yet in the Lords sight
He is mighty and bright
He will reap the crops
And the fruit of his work
When he outlives those that smirk

I was never good with women
When they choose me, it freaks me out
Why me? I'm disgusting

So I kissed the one at arms reach
While the one farther away cried
And I realized the error

That I love the one far away
As I tried to warm up to her
She cried even harder

The one I kissed went away
I realized I lost them both
I was never good with women

Pain caused by misunderstanding
It's what I gained from mishandling my life.
When fear turns my stomach and I feel hot,
I try to imagine I'm someone I'm not.

Pain makes me lose control and twitch.
Is there a soul who can get me out of this ditch?
I've tried fighting, I've bloodied my fists;
I tried biting my tongue, but the pain persists.

I look to God, asking for help with this,
Meanwhile he acts like he doesn't exist.
My world consists of an impassable wall,
When I sleep, I'm curled up into a ball.

I'm too insane to work or sing.
I want for nothing, cause I hate everything.
All I can do is patiently endure,
Like Jesus said, and resist the accuser.

Seeing birds fly, they needn't a reason to live
They don't grieve about what they don't give
What do I call this weight on my back,
and if I were to stop, who would pick up the slack?
I need to work or the worms creep in
I cannot rest or rot seeps in
Turning in bed trying to ignore the pain
Controlling everything as sickness takes the reigns
Sometimes I wish I could let go
I wish things would fall into place on their own

The wicked surround the righteous
Like tribesmen around a flame
To a song of joy they dance
All while in a trance
Sometimes they get too close
And learn a lesson dire
That evil's only for a moment
But the righteous live forever

The good walk in a line
Straight and narrow as she goes
Everyone wants to turn them aside
And ask them what they hold
Yet when they tell the truth
They refuse to hear what's told
For wisdom is too high for fools
Yet better than fine gold

The wicked surround the righteous
Like moths drawn to a lamp
They do not fear the Son
And aren't a target of the evil one
They like darkness more than light
They're like bugs under a rug
They mock and scorn the purer souls
Until God pulls the plug

And so it begins, the waterfall of tears
It's been years and it's no longer fears
that are making me stay, I feel enraged
Today's the day I hit the toad

I want you dead and out of my head
You hear me? Get out - OUT!
You ***** rotten sewer rat
I took a ****, it's you I shat

Vengeance, whether cold or hot
I will serve, and blot you out
I used to care, while you just mocked
Trying to help, was all for naught

You're unstable
And it shows
Curb the highs
Raise the lows
Keep it steady
As she goes

Don't veer left
Nor go right
Do not flee
Don't try to fight
Dark at noon
Bright midnight

Do not weep
Do not rile
Walk to hell
Single file
Line goes on
For a mile

One in front
One behind
Oiled machines
Gears don't grind
Spirit's gone
Flatlined

I would love to have you
And for you to have me
It'd be nice to hold you
Your eyes pretty like the sea
But I'm afraid to pick you
Worried of getting pricked
Scared of hurting you
I'll leave you be

The sky so blue, the earth so green
These eyes bear witness to what they've seen
My mind with the moon, I dream for fun
I love the moon and stars and sun
They don't care what I have done
I want to be useful before I'm gone
I need to wean myself off what I lean on
and stand on my own two feet for once
but they always take me back to where I've been
Eternal cycle that I'm in
It always goes back to a life of sin
Of gin and tonic, of tobacco and chronic
I never win, it's gotten late
My routine has become a fate which I hate,
but cannot break, is it too late?
My inner voice is crying now
I did not listen, didn't know how
I bow to the past, I prostrate low
To my routine, it's all I know

Any day the sky may fall
with stars descending to the earth
The sun may lose its light
The moon may fly away
There's a knife hanging over my head
Any day the earth may swallow me
Death lurks in every corner
Anyone may **** me now
For I have lost my soul
The fight in me is gone
To get it all back
Will take a great deal of sacrifice

Love is accepting
That's not what I gave
It wasn't love
But a harsh lesson from above
A desire to save
That put our ties in a grave
We succumbed to the hail
This love doomed to fail
My love has grown cold
And due to betrayal
Where once I was bold
I'm now just a baby
Or so I've been told
It put out my sun
I search for red flags
And see evil in everyone
Like they're hiding a gun
I
Trust
No
One

Love sees things
It goes in all directions
Sometimes it demands
self-sacrifice

It's like a ray of light
A flashlight held in your mind
Uncovering, illuminating
Giving meaning to life

The world is messed up
It's ugly and *****
If you give it some love
you can start making arrangements

I am so very tired
of hiding my love
Each time I do
I feel like I'm lying

And my heart starts racing
And my stomach starts hurting
I implode into myself
But love demands sacrifice

The skies are black
The stars went out
The people groan
The land is cold
I rub my eyes
Cannot believe
I have no one
To share my grief
Darkness won
Inside my heart
The sun has set
All hope is gone
It's how I feel
I'm all alone
Afraid and trembling
To the bone

We are abused but we know not guilt
We shoot to the sun, not to the ground
The hammer awaits us, but we don't shout
We are adorned flowers, thus we stick out
They tried to uproot us but we refuse to wilt
Tried to make us like they are, make us tilt
We have a problem with the way the world is bent
Our message has been written, wrapped and sent
They took our message and cross-examined it
Called us insane and tried to cure our insanity
Made us more manageable, an object to study
But they didn't see we are the corner stones of society
We are prophets the world sweeps under a rug
We get stabbed in the back each time we give a hug
The kind the world refuses to listen to
And gives us drugs to chew
If they could they would give us lobotomies
And electric shocks, like they did throughout history
Some say they are not ready
Not on our frequency
But in reality
They love lies and secrecy
For they are servants to money
Most of our parents were such
You must die to be free
Is that asking too much?

I consume spirits like I eat bread
Some make me choke a bit
These I can predict and dread
When they come I have to sit
No control over what pops in my head
Yet I can control how I react to it
Let it win and end up dead
Make it lose it throws a fit
Its true aim is left unsaid
To win me over to the pit

Putting under a microscope things that are simple
Searching for answers in places unreachable
Overcomplicating things to make them exploitable
If it makes money the cup is half full
Science is like wine for which people drool
Yet it has no answers for it is merely a tool
Look at old tech that lost its spirit - it's no longer cool
The truth neither bends nor changes unlike the fool

I saw the traps
Yet went right in
She hunted me down
Chewed me up
And spat me out

She was there when I went down
She was there when I was made a clown
She turned her back as I drowned
I begged and cried, don't let me die
She just sighed and said goodbye

I am the darkness she locked me in
I am possessed by what has been
Disturbed by what I continually see
I refuse to let go and break free
Yet there's still fight left in me

I will not rest
I will not cease
I'll devise a plan
She'll come crawling back
On hands and knees

Then I'll beat her till she's sore
I will make her beg for more
Ensure the pain sinks to her core
And when she knows she's done for
I will strike a blade through the *****

I want to get married for a free card
Too much kindness makes me hard
I must maintain my celibacy
The family tree ends with me

There is a woman that I know
Who thinks it's good to **** and blow
The story goes she don't last long
Moans and screeches are her song

God forgive this worthless stoner
I'm alone but not a loner
The way you coerced it into her
I will break your little *****

And she is a little spinner
And at love I'm no beginner
I will forget and ignore yet I find
I'm going insane from seduction of mind

A shallow existence is a price to pay
For inviting comfort every day
It tugs me in, the way it pulls
I eat my fill, yet I'm never full
I drink and smoke, and cannot stop
I pray for the day these habits I drop
Yet it's hard when you live on your back
Stuck in a corner like a cornered rat
Fools surround, I cannot teach
A waste of words, their brains don't reach
Speaking only from their point of view
It's an assault on them to speak what's true
Just try to reason or get through
Nothing will stop them looking down on you
Love is patient, love is kind
I hold fast when it's time to unwind
Yet the fear never leaves my mind
Rest is a task and hard to find
Unless I'm doped up
Unless I'm messed up
The dust sets, things start breaking
I can't move with the pills I'm taking
I swallow the pain, I feel so dumb
Despite the taste, it makes me numb
I was the one who couldn't conform
And most of what I say is against the norm

I put my hand on her shoulder
say thanks for being there
I feel her revolting, she moves away
as countless voices numb my ears
They squeal their accusations
I can only laugh, I've been here before
I tried to repent of my iniquities
Every night I say I won't do it again
I'm used to being embarrassed
Live the life of a pariah
People spitting as I pass
but what I experienced is downright humiliation
I expect betrayal from friends
No one has been faithful
Loyalty is nowhere to be found
ever since I became a laughingstock
people have avoided me
My name used to be meaningless
now it's utterly soiled
I just sit alone in a corner
and smoke and drink my problems away
hoping this too shall pass
and some day mourning will turn to joy

I am not afraid of my mortality
I have grown accustomed to shaming
All this dirt thrown at my face
I'm still praying for the best

My relationship with God is my greatest asset
I don't mind if you share my passion
Turn back today, obey, nobody can say
they have mapped their own future or fate

I'm afraid of the power God has given me
To have a mind that can see beyond what's in front of me
I really don't want to be seen until I'm ready
In the past I've hurt some people accidentally

My people used me as a stepping stone I confess
Yet time rolls on and things progress
I don't mind being the last to clean up the mess
I like being last, at the bottom, unnoticed

I want to go back
to simpler times
when the grass was greener
and people were more innocent

I don't want what's new
I miss the ignorance of childhood
When I felt a zeal for life
before I knew evil

I don't believe in evolution
I don't want amendments
The more you add, the more you take away
Some things are above humans

I want to be more pure
but this irks some people
so I shut myself away
to await better times

And I know it will get worse
before it gets better
People are angry
but I will protest quietly

I looked into your eyes and smiled
You weren't very welcoming
So I shut myself in
And left

I wonder about fate
Not just mine but of yours
It's easy to tell you to go to hell
Harder to assume you're going to heaven

I want to know about fate
Even if it's none of my business
Will you be there in the afterlife?
Will I have to put up with you there?

Others might call me lazy
But I'm working on not looking back so much
There is no guarantee of a future
Each day is like the last

And the past is still in me
It jolts and shocks me
I don't want to dwell anymore
I want to talk to you without being afraid

Running amok, judging
Pointing out flaws as if I were helping
Building an empire by stepping on people
Choosing who to spare and who to cast down
I killed everyone and now I'm alone
Chased them all off, and proclaimed myself victor
It wasn't until the scene ended and I had a long rest
I closed my eyes and the horror sunk in
I saw all those people I redirected with words
They've all moved on while I stayed in place
The visions wouldn't stop, I heard my own voice
Being mocked and contradicted by my conscience
The people I hurt looked at me weird
I built my house on sand, but the foundation has shifted
The tables have turned and now I must suffer
To see those I tried to control ascending to greatness
Walking through doors that have long since shut for me
I can only peer through the window or climb a wall
Before being chased away like a thief

I don't need a sign
The good Lord foretold
Enemies of mine
Will be in my own household

I'm not on your level
Like a flower I wilt
Slave to the devil
Crippled by guilt

With fear they controlled
I was inclined to do good
I did what I was told
But they misunderstood

My mom was a breadwinner
So was my dad
Each evening at dinner
They spoke of the bad

Above they would lurk
And tasks they would hand
To force me to work
And against me to band

I was forced to rebel
Which may be a sin
Now I'm a slave to the devil
Without solid foundation

Had a good time
I was free
Did what I wanted
I had to reach
This point
To battle the spectre
That haunts me
I've been lazy
I've been reclusive
Most of all
Selfish
Now I live
With the results
For alas
I have no one
Not a soul
Who will carry the burden
Of all I've done
I'm alone
With my thoughts
But in the end
That's the cure
For my restless head
As I sink into bed

Lost faith in humanity
These bruises ain't healing
Why'd you expose me,
Make me walk around naked?
When you saw my deeds clothed me
You soiled my garment
So I threw it away
It was burning my skin
I have flashbacks of falling
And nobody calling
But my ears are still open
And I'm tired of lying
Gotta keep moving
This is no time for crying
Tell me the truth
What can I do
How can I help you

Think of today
today is the day
what was yesterday
will be tomorrow
Think of today
It's enough for today
Tomorrow's problems
will soon be yesterday's
Today is the day
and you'll be okay
Tomorrow's problems
leave for tomorrow
Eat sleep and play
Today is the day
For this I pray
for more days like today

Sifting memories through a mesh
Trying to clean my mind like a litter box
Until all that remains is fresh
Still I haven't learned what to do
With the *** and the poo
I tried throwing my own crap at it
I tried swallowing it
I even tried to sit on it
No matter what I do I can't discard it
There is no trash bin that will erase it
I suppose I have to work with it

There once was a raging inferno in my core
Over time it receded into a moderate blaze
Then a small fire
Now it's just a spark
It was hard when I had to douse my own flames
but God ensured I didn't end up a smoking ash heap

I wondered for a while
why I was unable to reignite my passion
even with gentle and gradual guidance
I had little drive or power
I've noticed how zeal can burn the people I loved
and turn their faces sour

Yet when I needed them most, they just stared
When I needed someone to stand up for me
They didn't dare -  for their minds were elsewhere
But my spark is still there
Waiting, dormant
For someone to love, for a reason to care

Something's off, I don't know what
No one to trust with deeper thought
A wind of pain has passed me by
Evil rises, soaring high
I clench my fists, I get nervous
I try to find the cause of this

There are those who delight in the bad
They want to fight, with all they have
Some like to dance to the ever black
I faint from terror, I want light back
We must let them have their fun
And endure all that is done under the sun

When I lie in fear and I'm low in strength
I hope I'll persevere, and go the length
I'll find you and draw you near, without angst
We will put in work, not be put to waste
Someday when we're a bit more strong
Then we'll find a place where we belong

Light and dark
Good and bad
Male and female
Are not equal

For light dispels darkness
Good triumphs over bad
Male goes into female
Such it was and always will be

Love sees none of this
Love sees hope in all things
That work together
For the ultimate ******

So I will not be bitter
When suffering persecution
I await the storm's end
And let love work its miracles

I tried to be stern in all that I did, I had to learn I cannot put a lid on you.
I tried to be meek and kind, but you only thought I was weak and losing my mind, how untrue!
Whether the **** or the softie, I just cant make it work.
Whatever happens, wherever you go, I hope you can forgive me, and we'll both live where the clear waters flow and the plants grow.
I never wanted you to suffer, not the way I suffer, it's a wonder I can't see past my blunders.
I am no less than you, nor do I deem myself better; if we could meet in the middle, I could fulfill what I said in the letter, that
I love you, and my love is to let you go.

I've been thinking a lot
On how to succeed
For I'm ashamed
Of the life I lead
There are many books
One can read
Some say pain is gain
To sweat and to bleed
Others say success is measured
In every good deed

Yet I say success begins with the heart
It must have root
That's where it should start
Not by habits of hand or foot
It must be broken apart
It must be thought through
A strong foundation
Uniquely you

I want to forsake my possessions
I must straighten what's bent
And begin my sessions
Of enlightenment
Or these distractions
I'll take to the grave
Only to find out
They cannot save

My patience has grown thin
With those who don't listen
They're beyond reproach
Like cockroaches in human skin
They eat so much fat
Yet remain thin
They exercise sin
And squirm out of any situation
They see but don't perceive
They laugh when others grieve
They're too busy with their employment
They've ****** all enjoyment
Out of my life so I'm stagnant
To the point it's poignant
It concerns me
How I'm up against an army of worms
It burns
Being alone cause everyone is like stone
A job is to earn money
But they sell their souls
For money they burn
Till they're in the hole or the urn
And then there's me
Who was never free
Poor as can be
But I know it's all vanity

Battles waged with words
What does it achieve
I've caused pain and hurt
For this I now grieve
I am stricken by what I said
Vowed to never use my voice for hurt again
I've tossed truth to the dirt
Now I'm sideways and bent
All my luck is spent
And the heartache
The words start in my heart
And shift between my stomach
And my mouth, tearing me apart
Tearing me in two
What did I achieve
I cannot speak
The words are stuck between my teeth
Trapped under my tongue
Lost within my heart
Drowned within my blood
What am I supposed to say

I want to be a different person in heaven
Then I can forget these days of old
You don't have to come to my funeral
Let the angels come for my soul
For I have no love for this world
That was to be my home

You left me alone
I can't do anything alone
I was taught that I can't do anything alone
But it's better than being with you
Who is nothing but a vision in my mind
That I'm too drained to fight anymore

You make me sick and *****
I walk around with you in my head all day
You're a danger and I like to think you are deceased
Your rotten memories are unworthy of poetry
And so I have nothing to write cause there is no love
Only above, where an army is ready to overthrow this world

You think you owe us nothing but you are wrong
You owe us decency which you exchanged for pride
And soon you will hide, or else you will die
For this is not our final form
We will be new people in heaven
And we will war with you again cause it's not over yet

I've been living under a spell for so long
A lying backbiting little runt of a demon
Who points out all my faults and humiliations
And throws them in my face at will

I can feel my strength being drained
And it takes all my focus to redeem myself
I say to my soul, I am innocent
Compared to some, I am a saint

In each flashback or vision I have
The demon is there to laugh
My memories are a mess of truths and lies
Time distorted my mind to the events of the past

We are living through trying times
We are at the cusp of a breakthrough
I will be holding my post
Even if I must stand alone

Hatred and love are similar emotions
Especially when the one you loved
Is the one you now fear
You tried to feed me to your dogs
And feast on my tears
But I fought your dogs and won

You blotted my sun
You could have told me the truth
That we weren't meant to share fate
You left me to figure it out
and pick up the pieces of my broken heart
on my own

My heart isn't stone
But my uptick is steady
While you gradually decrease
Into a faded memory
My compassion for you will cease
And I'll do nothing as you gasp, like you did to me

I don't need much
Your touch would be nice
But I always think twice
and can't break the ice

One day I approached you
and broached you to stay
you said I must go
without delay

I thought it was done
but then you turned to say
what drugs are you on
and how much for some you ***

I move through life uprightly
And judge my enemies lightly
Very few things spark my ire
I turn from base desire

I do not fuss or grumble
My spirit's low and humble
It keeps my feet from slipping
Ensures that I don't stumble

I don't have much to give
Though you don't need much to live
If I say no to what you want
I hope you will forgive

If someone steals my shoes or shirt
My heart will weep bitterly
For the people that I hurt
Not for the one who hurt me

I walk with God, when his light goes out I sit
And if I should die, so be it
For through my suffering I have made others strong
And so the Lord will put me in the right, not the wrong

Good thoughts are hard to find
My thoughts are dark by design
Virtue is so bright a thing
I just want to end my suffering

I unwillingly take part in the fight
That has no end in sight
I need relief from the constant pain
That showers my heart with so much rain

I want to know something with my heart
I wish I could tell apart
The difference between good and bad
Discernment I wish I had

But most things are a shade of grey
And what hurt me last year still hurts today
I try to forget with all my might
At once suffocating my inner light

What's that I see, around the bend
Justice and love in the end
A reward that's true and personalized
Endure suffering to achieve the prize

As the great light shines on,
I see my path, and glorify the sun.
And as I go about my own way,
I look up, and praise the day.
When its my turn to die,
I’ll give thanks for the sky.

As the great light shines on,
I can dance and laugh and have fun.
For a moment I forget my hearts decay,
And the fact that I can’t stay.
For there will come a time when I say goodbye,
Yet I’ll always be thankful for the sky.

They go where they want
They curse and they taunt
Yet words can't describe the way they haunt

Near and far
They look for a star
To put a lid on a heart like a bug in a jar

I think a lot
In haste
Trying to blot the thoughts that fill my heart full of hate

Life sometimes brings
Something that stings
I try to forget, remember only the good things

I hear the words of the wise
There is no disguise
And no one will share with us the desperate cries

Below or above
Raven or dove
Truth means war, yet only love...

The scientist thought he was smart and clever
Until he got a runny nose
He couldn’t even cure the common cold

****** got applause
Jesus got the cross

There are two wolves inside you
Only one is good
Feed the good wolf

Don’t try to save the whole world, that’s dumb
Just look after yourself and your loved ones, ***