My good vibes, you cannot steal
I'll close my eyes, and try to heal
My shattered soul, my broken heart
Behind closed doors, is where I'll start

The public life yields much reward
But I much prefer my private life
You can knock, you can shout
I don't need you, I'll lock you out

What is life, but one huge test
Work is for gain, home is for rest
The path of life is difficult and slippery
For one addicted to technology

How quick they are to show from outside in
But won't confess from inside out
Half-truths and lies, a fake story
Conceals how they fell short of God's glory

Technology and junk food are highly addictive
*** and drugs, is this why we live?
Impulsive desire, is this what it's about?
Do it responsibly, or toss it out!

I need to change before I'm in too deep
I need rest, not just sleep
I can't always take what life brings
I must let go of certain things

I would love to have you
And for you to have me
It'd be nice to hold you
Your eyes pretty like the sea
But I'm afraid to pick you
Worried of getting pricked
Scared of hurting you
I'll leave you be

I can't see around the bend, but I can look around
Inside my mind no remembrance to be found
If I could look backwards, not in hindsight but in replay
Perhaps then I would remember and learn from each day

But I can't
Nothing's sorted
All my memories are distorted
I can't control them, especially the ones I'm trying to

Forget
Drown out
Sleep off
Part with

I dwell in the shadows, I refuse to see
Yet I'm frequently bothered by some memory
It's hard to know what's true and real
When in a moment you can feel

Pride and cheer
Then blinding fear
Sadness here
Anger there
Did it really happen, should I care?

The world's a stage, it's all a show
Memories come, and memories go
Nobody's perfect
I can't pretend
That what I know didn't happen
I must be stronger
I must get you off my shoulders
I want to grow
And be at peace with what I know

If my belly could speak, wonder what it would say
It grumbles and tumbles and hurts all day
Perhaps I should quit smoking, perhaps I should fast
I know deep down the problem is caused by curses cast

I fed on competition, I savoured violence
To outwit and outdo made sense
At last it's a dead end
It's not how it works, I haven't a friend

I've regurgitated my memories and vomited out poison
It took some years, hardest years I've ever seen
I want to turn back and repent against sin
I want to sober up, so I can be healthy again

I move through life uprightly
And judge my enemies lightly
Very few things spark my ire
I turn from base desire

I do not fuss or grumble
My spirit's low and humble
It keeps my feet from slipping
Ensures that I don't stumble

I don't have much to give
Though you don't need much to live
If I say no to what you want
I hope you will forgive

If someone steals my shoes or shirt
My heart will weep bitterly
For the people that I hurt
Not for the one who hurt me

I walk with God, when his light goes out I sit
And if I should die, so be it
For through my suffering I have made others strong
And so the Lord will put me in the right, not the wrong

They go where they want
They curse and they taunt
Yet words can't describe the way they haunt

Near and far
They look for a star
To put a lid on a heart like a bug in a jar

I think a lot
In haste
Trying to blot the thoughts that fill my heart full of hate

Life sometimes brings
Something that stings
I try to forget, remember only the good things

I hear the words of the wise
There is no disguise
And no one will share with us the desperate cries

Below or above
Raven or dove
Truth means war, yet only love...

I intentionally live a simple life so I can give it up with ease
I try to decrease the things I see and hope the fear will cease
I'm spending a lot of time wishing for a happy ending
I'm hoping for love in return for the love I'm sending

I threw all my love at you and hoped it would help us grow
Instead of nurturing the seed of love you simply let it go
I should have known your heart of stone was not a place to sow
It got swept away by a stream that day to where the rivers flow

Yet what may seem lost to me may be still be discovered
By another, who can use the seed as medicine to recover
For I can confess what I'm depressed over and uncover the truth
And we can learn to be better lovers than we were in our youth.