1. little monsters
there are things inside of me. pre-historic things. lizard kings. things that cannot become words. some have been buried there for years. others came alive. recently. on their own. rose from the swamps without intent. I enter the depths of this unexplored world. but I am lost without my words. I have not developed the skills to survive. amongst these little monsters.
2. it rains here
her hair. like her mind. was scattered. made of all things deep and muddy. made me think of the earth. before corruption. nature’s reign. she has a soul. I don’t think. she always had one. I am possessed by her. obsessed with her. she is too young to be ancient. she is too old to be modern. she is finishing her sentence. I will wait for her. no matter how long it takes.
3. awareness
I sit in a corner. folded hands. a mild child. I scream into the lead-paint walls. and watch my skin peel. a wild child. I reach the edges. consciousness implodes. in my brain. she wraps herself around me. thinking I will calm. eventually. believing I can be calm. eventually. I am a snake. biting myself. squeezing myself. shedding my skin.
4. after math
she escapes. first she exploded. inside. then a year later. she died. poison invaded her walls. poison as a solid can be removed. poison as a liquid. or a gas. spreads everywhere. inside. slowly a solid grows again. and overtakes everything. good. and clean. and then she was no longer. a name. or a number. she could make no payment. she could not be charged. anymore.