there are days i dread writing, to get into my characters’ heads, and live their lives full of  passion and violence

it gets to me, changes my mood, i feel it, intensely, as if it were happening to me, and i can’t escape without trauma, collateral damage for the day

so i procrastinate, avoid and ignore it, distracting myself in the mundane and minutia

love is a lie, a fool’s errand, a lost cause of being burned and churned; chewed up and spat out; of hate and bitterness. teenage veterans traumatized by the senseless romantic violence of the endless ****** wars.

of ****** prostituting themselves out to Chads and Tyrones, eating like pigs at an unlimited buffet, using, abusing, and abandoning, when they’ve had their fill.

of simps acting like dancing monkeys entertaining and quenching thirsty Stacies, who string them along, placeholders until a Tyrone pays attention to them.

how do i live without you
without love
when it’s all that i crave
i miss the tenderness
the soft embraces
of you in my bed

i’m a donkey with an ice cream cone on my forehead pretending to be a unicorn

how bittersweet it is
knowing from the first kiss
one day you’ll leave

love is an illusion
a false reprieve
quenching the soul
lost in the blackness of rejection

i miss you…so much…, it hurts
i can’t stop thinking about you…,dreaming about you
i need to feel you…, touch you…, smell and taste you
hear your whispers, moans, fears and secrets
feel your sweat and wetness against my skin
say it, i want to hear it, that you love me
and only me