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sandra dryer Nov 2018
feels like life’s on pause
existence is buffering
alone with my thoughts
there words of my suffering

don't know how i let it get this far.
locked my emotions up in jar
and now breaking  free
now there braking me
but happy's all you get to see.
sandra dryer Nov 2018
i'm high on panic
all i can see is the static
filling my head
and my thoughts are as rapid as they are tragic
i bought a dime bag of other peoples problems
thinking i can solve them
but i can't
i popped a pill filled with other peoples tears
took a hit of other peoples fears
just another ***** of humanity.
idk
sandra dryer Nov 2018
your shaking
your crying
because you know its not enough
no matter how hard your trying
and as the tears run done your face
you can only think
"what have i done"

its over
sandra dryer Oct 2018
Walking around  I feel like there’s a spotlight on me.
I’m in a play I didn’t addition for
right on stage floor.
But there’s no applauses
Just silence
The quite almost violent
To the point of knocking me down with humiliation
With relation
That im not good enough
With  thought what if and it might
With the victory and satisfaction just out of sight.
runs my life
Its stage manger
The director
In charge of background and more.
Anxiety the play of my life
sandra dryer Oct 2018
Its not my fault my delusional and a freak
That I don’t know how to think
That I’m hearing all this things
That I’m seeing all these creatures
Never crying
Being told not show emotions because there the things that me weaker.
Feels like I’m dying
And knowing that all never be like the rest
Even if I do try my best
That all always be this pathetic waste of space to the end of days.
And that I don’t safe or loved even in my own home
To sit way alone
Emotional broken
Mentally scared
And wounds that never be able to heal in my heart
sandra dryer Oct 2018
You can see it in their eyes
Shifting back and forth
You can hear it in their lies, Spilling from their lips
First from their minds to their mouth then to the floor
Breaking me down till I’m not much more

I am not just a person
But the more that I show that I’m different, that I am me
There onions worsen
What’s wrong with society
And soon the others join them
I must admit, they look like they’re having fun
Making me, making us
feel sad alone and dumb

But I guess some of us were made to stray from society’s light
In order to be who, we are
So I’m stuck in an agonizing ongoing fight
Between conformity, happiness and reason

— The End —