Just like a moth drawn to an open flame, I can’t help but be attracted to the things I know that will hurt me most. Withered, severed my connection to all things impractical. The things that once set my soul ablaze no longer produce that; oh so familiar spark. Fulfilled tendencies to dance with the devil, Just a roll of the dice to see tomorrow. The hollow filled with sorrow, find me at peace with outlandish dreams. I greet the day with a grinding of teeth, headaches bleed through my thoughts as ink seeps though paper. I’ve grown so fond of the night, I swear I can hear the moon weep for tomorrow.

Have you ever liked someone so much you regret meeting them?

Who am I?

Maybe that’s the million dollar question.
Are you your reflection?
Are you that voice in your head that you hear when you read?
Perhaps you’re your heartbeat.
As you walk in the street, if you think of it; everyone’s seeking a sense of self and that voice is having a million thoughts a day.
Everyone’s having a complex human experience that sculpts their reality.
Maybe we’re all just one being, experiencing billions of lives simultaneously as an experiment.
Who knows?
Maybe we’re just an evolutionary accident; as in the universes lifespan, humanity’s existence is but a blink of an eye in the sense of time.
Now... let me ask, who are you?

Day dreaming
Night living
Have you ever stopped and reflected?

Is there really any meaning to the day to day activities of life as a whole?
In my mind, nothing makes sense.
Ive come to the conclusion that life in itself is predetermined therefore the same choice is inevitable.
Every choice I’ve made has led me to this point in time.
It only seems to make sense when I’m asleep, life seems to be the real illusion.
What if death is the true release?
I guess, I’ll have to wait and see.

like water
I poured myself into her until she was overflowing at the brim

like reinforced steel
I bridged my heart to hers and welded myself to her soul

like the sun
I filled myself with light to cover her darkness

like a blanket
I shielded her from the harsh world underneath the covers

like magnets
I orbited her aura until we inevitably collided

like a seed
I felt myself growing up from her

Then, like an idiot
I could tell she felt nothing.

I remember ecstasy,
She felt and tasted like you.
So bitter but I swear I’ve never felt so high.
I wanted to stay in that moment forever.
You’re truly the embodiment of happiness.
I don’t think I’ll ever feel that way again.
& I don’t want to.
Love will be the death of me still.
It’s the worst, most beautiful feeling I’ve ever experienced.
I can’t trust my intuition when I’m on the drug, love.
Intoxicating, addictive, I hate that I need it.  
I’ve convinced myself that I don’t.

I don’t need it.