My body is so tired
So tired that not even
Two and a half liters of you
Can't even help.
Why Mountain Dew,
Do you make my chest hurt?

...It's cold
and it's dead
lifeless
misery
Lying within a
paradox in the dark
Landslide thoughts
in a market of
funny looking people
feed the confusion until
everything fades away
Walking dreamless
toward delirium
with a half lit cigarette and
all the world's regret
to seek the answers
in a struggle to defy the
madness
Chaos
there's always reason to embrace
rage
when everything seems to fall
apart...

Are we not together you and I?
Should we share our affection in private?
Safe from the piercing daggers
Hidden from the wandering eyes

Never had I felt more alone
That moment when you vanished
And all that was left
Was a lingering scent of longing

Two weeks couldn't come faster
Counting down the days to bliss
The reverse blastoff that slows
To a snales pace, a dead crawl

All I ever wanted was you
Only you, substitutes be ******
No more mindless loves, afterall
Are we not together, you and I?

All she ever dreamed of was to be your lover
She’ll never hear the word love
without feeling your heart beat in her soul
But after more than a year and three months
You threw it all away
You led her on just to let her go
Falling out of love is hard
But falling for betrayal is worse
You once told her told her to look in the mirror
and smile when she is feeling sad
But when looking there’s no smile
Just a broken heart

She can feel a change, she's looking for it.
But she's a smart girl who wears lots of sweaters and drinks cocoa.
She talks about books and issues and kisses in the rain.
Yet, she slightly mutilates the natural state of her body in order to be deemed acceptable.
She is unconventionally beautiful.
And *she does her loving in the winter time.

I close my eyes hoping the pain will pass
Excruciating
Numbing
Wiping out my conscious thought.
I should be used by now,
To the patterns it follows.
Betrayal,denial, anger.
How could you?
You couldn't.
I could hit you.
Is it possible i didn't know you?
That you were different for a while?
I probably saw what i wanted to
Between lunacy and desperation.
You see, i was afraid to be alone.
The sounds that keep me up echo
Wishes that it hadn't ended
Care for my shattered heart.
Dying on the floor where you tossed it
Am not perfect but i was right.
I dunno how to be strong and go on
when i miss you with every breath
Every thought rotates around your face
Swimming in and out of focus
Of my glazed mind.
I seek release in hot tears.
Falling like from the sky
Will they obliterate the pain?
Or my resolve to stay away?
It wasn't meant to end this way.
I was your love,or so you said.
We all expect love to last forever
Instead it shackles us and makes us slaves.
I don't feel free though.
I would rather be with you
And ***** the consequences.
Oh gosh it hurts so much
Am rolled up into a ball
Sobbing out my love.

Mr. Invincible
Mr. Unkillable
Mr. just walks away
I wish I knew the exact percent
of how close I came to death
or how close I came to ******
it seems as if
there is a God out there somewhere
who had different plans for me
The EMT's were shocked
by how little was wrong with me
and I signed the refusal form
and walked back out into the night
Mr. Invincible
but for how long?