I wake to alarm—
Under sink pots, pans banging,
Breakfast time for cat.

The only thing I did today…

I will never be one of the great ones.
She proclaimed, “Mediocre.”
I have licked the lollipop of
mediocrity, the sweetness pulled me in.

The never trying harder, became easier.
Laying down, lying about laying down.
I will go nowhere, and nowhere will
welcome me.

For I am as mediocre as any member
of nowhere can be. The machine of
dull people will **** me in, another
cog in slow motion doing nothing.

I will never be quoted, nor doted upon
by any hero. Never a leading lady
just the shadow around the spotlight.
Mediocrity is an evil friend,

one who I welcomed into my head.
No matter how much I plod him,
he never pays his rent.
Me and mediocrity are fated betrothed,

but no matter because I’ve forgotten
what light looks like. And striving to see
is forbidden by mediocrity and me.

The broken glass lies on the floor
in front of me.
It has shattered into many pieces,
just as my spirit has done so
many times before.  
I have struggled for a long time
to find my place in this world,
but, one thing I have never questioned,
is my identity.

Beneath the surface,
God has bestowed upon me the
greatest beauty of all – my heart.
Not in its physical form,
but, in its spiritual one,
is what defines my identity.  
Simply known as character,
it is how one is seen
leading their life,
each and every day.  

With pride, my identity
can shine onto others,
as an example of how
a heart can be so loving,
so caring, so understanding,
so compassionate, so kind.  
All of these traits are
what comprise my identity.

Forever, I will personify these traits,
like one who proudly wears
a badge of courage;
a badge to show that
I have weathered the
toughest of battles,
and have come out
stronger than ever .  
Along the way,
with each challenge presented,
not once has my identity faltered.  

As I pick up the pieces
of the broken glass,
I place them all together
on the surface in front of me.  
The cracked glass outline
reminds me of my many failures;
however, I look past the
fissures that are apparent on the surface,
and see my identity staring back at me.  
It is complete, and reflective,
not fragmented and dull.  

Even though certain facets
of my life remain unclear to me now,
my identity is something
that I am most certain of.
With pride, I carry it with
me every day; with honor,
I display it courageously.  

Vicki A. Zinn

March 12, 2013

And I pushed them all away,
So they wouldn't see my face,
While I cried.
Because words they had to say,
Have just gotten in the way,
So I'm 'fine.'

Nothing really scares me.
Not the dark, not the light,
Not animals, not bugs,
Not ghosts or scary movies.

We're both pulling.
Even if I pull harder,
I end up with the rope burn.
And suddenly I'm pushing you away.
You know too much.

And that terrifies me.

And I guess we've all just hit a new low.
Rock bottom ain't as deep as it goes.

And the glass.
It has broken.
Shattered.

The pieces lie helplessly undone,
On the floor.

You can't ever fully put it back together.
Sure you can glue the big parts to each other.
You can paint over the cracks,
And you can attempt to fill in the holes,
But it will never be the same.

And maybe you'll cut yourself as you clean up the mess.
Maybe a shard will slip into your delicate little finger.
But you will heal.
You will...

Some people hear voices.
Others hear music,
But the type that only is heard beneath their skulls.
Me?
I hear words.
Poems,
Lyrics,
Stories,
That have yet to he written down.
Sometimes I love it.
Other times it drives me crazy.

It's been a rough week,
But it's finally ending.
Finally I can sleep.

A lot of things that I didn't do,
And a lot more that I should've.
Accomplished a lot,
Let a lot of people down.
Helped others,
But hurt them more.
Didn't reach goals,
Or due dates.
Forgot to forget how to fail.

But at last,
I can finally shut my eyes,
And drift off to somewhere else
Somewhere far, far away.