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I'm a child of a love that remained unwoven
Every version of me never realized just how broken
You can get just trying to do the right thing
For your child it ain't sweet but that's the icing
Sacrificing everything down to your last breath
Making sure I'm taken care of even if you don't know what could happen next
Give me all your love I'm selfish when it comes to happiness
As long as I've been alive I feel like I hardly know you
Or the things you've truly done
To allow your son to see another one
A day where I can play pretend nothing is wrong as long as I'm looked after
Growing up I swear I've been craving laughter
In the absence of it from your happy never after
Little did I know I was helping decipher our next chapters
Not from the rafters, but front and center
Robbed  your attempts to find the love of your life
Thinking it was me because it's all I've ever known
Fighting for your life to finally find the home
You feel where you belong and I've seen you belong
Decisions I've made you chose me to lean on
The gravity of the situation was beyond
Anything I could comprehend like we could be gone
From the place I've always known as home
Feel so selfish I made the decision for us to be all alone
And you took me there without hesitation
I often wonder if the destination
I picked for us was the reason for our demonstration
Why we go out of our way to make others happy
I still think about it to this day
When youre older you realize the power of what you say
On a path others have paved does not ensure the road won't need work when it's your turn to use it
In the corridors of my mind, I dwell in shadows of fear,
Bound by chains of indecision, moves I dare not steer.
Yearning for paths untrodden, yet fate holds me in its grasp,
Time slips through my fingers, a relentless, fleeting clasp.

Once master of my moments, now a pawn in life's cruel game,
Each wasted breath a currency, spent without acclaim.
No riches to amass, only burdens to stack high,
Ninety-nine unseen troubles, hidden from the naked eye.
I recall the days of learning to teach, a journey on the fly,
Delving into the minds of students beyond the naked eye.
Words unspoken found refuge upon the written page,
A former kid myself, aging with each passing stage.

Uncertain at first, my purpose seemed out of reach,
Focused solely on the art of crafting poetic speech.
Memorable were the students, minds so malleable,
Given a chance, transformations happened, session by session, palpable.

One young man, a silent observer without a spoken word,
Doodling on pages, where every story he'd heard.
Guiding him to express the unspoken swirling in his heart,
He grasped my hand, a firm shake, realizing his part.

No push for attention, just relishing in the freedom's glow,
A class where liberation flourished, a desire to bestow.
Easing the stress of middle school, where sharp minds reside,
Teaching them to tap into what I believed was art's guide.

Poetry, a sanctuary, laughter withheld from judgment's grasp,
Expressing love, hatred, sadness—a multifaceted clasp.
Tears flowed freely as a kid spoke of his dad,
In that moment, the profound power of teachers I had.

A child with dyslexia, a narrative to share,
Named me his favorite teacher with a tender care.
A laptop program aiding his thoughts and dreams,
Talent and stories emerged, beyond what it seems.

Offer alternatives to learning, nurture the right mentality,
Never undermine the impact, discover the key's vitality.
In the realm of education, where potentials intertwine,
A teacher's influence is a beacon, forever to shine.
Sipping on these moments, like you could never get enough,
Let me whisper in your ear, I'll be your morning cup,
Brewing a smile on your face before your eyes are open,
Add a pinch of sugar, though the sweetness not important.
Why do I feel my efforts lack adequacy?
As time unfolds, my vision fades progressively.
ADHD complicates decisions, a challenging mission,
Thoughts compete, a mental juxtaposition.
Desired shots, no ammo, a mind's lonely condition,
Trapped within, feeling like a personal prison.
Daily, I slaughter my soul in monotonous repetition,
A ghost of my aspirations, lost in the exhibition.
A painted smile on a shell of what I sought,
Running on empty, no gas stations in thought.
I see who you really are right from inside my home
When you think there's no one there Know you're not alone
I am all your stories you imbued me with this curse
From inside my dollhouse  an observer I'm immersed
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