Yes, I still crave dad's
approval. Maybe I'll strip
my way through college.

Normally I'd hate to use cliches
But for you, I have to make an exception
Because you take my breath away.
There, I've said it.
I'll admit it's corny.
Nevertheless, it's all too true.
It's that heart skips a beat,
I can't think straight when you're around,
I want to spend every moment with you kind of love.
You make me experience a whole bundle of cliches,
And it gives them real meaning.

One year, two, three
All of it blurs together.
My whole childhood,
gone in the blink of an eye.
Washed away with the waves of Huron.
In this moment,
the last of an era,
I want to stay.
I want to gather it,
pieces and fragments of seventeen years,
Into a blanket, surrounding me.
Close to me, within reach,
So it can't escape me.
Like if I wade in this deep blue,
Further and further,
I won't grow up.

Congratulations.
You managed to **** me the *******.
That's very hard to do.
Someone should give you a medal.

So much to think about,
My mind is spinning round and round.
Who am I, who will I be
If I release the real me.
Hidden away I am safe from the world,
But there will be a time when all of me is revealed.
I am scared to let myself be free,
No one would ever love the real me.

The way you make me feel
is remarkable.
Your smile,
Your laugh,
Your touch.
You don't even have to try
One little gesture,
Sends me off the edge.
Falling so fast
and I'm loving the rush.
It's all because of you.

What do you see
when you look into my eyes?
Do you see what I see?
I see a beautiful light,
A spark,
that I want to reach out and grab.
I want to make it mine,
Make it ours.
Do you see it too?

I went to that place today.
You know the one.
The one we went to together in the midst of a freezing winter
For some hot food and seclusion from the rest of our world.
The one with the school across the street
That we snuck into in the fleeting night
To climb the castle and have our first kiss at the very top.
I went to that place today.
The one filled with you.

Your car was in a parking lot. I was immediately paralyzed by fear. A sigh of relief escaped me when a young woman opened the door.
2. I saw you in Elliot Rodgers. How he believed that women exist to fulfill his needs. When he took out those who didn't.
3. Your face appeared in a dream. Patronizing me, chastising me. Blood blossomed from my wrists. I woke up disappointed.

There's always tomorrow
to think about actions
to worry about making
the right decision.

Today is for doing
Doing whatever gives you joy
and gets you through the day.
Today is about living.

My life
Is a mess right now.
And I'm doing my best
To sort it all out.
I'm sorry if I hurt you
Along the way.
I'm just trying
To take it day by day.
Whatever happens
I want you to know.
I love you
Even if I don't
Always let it show.

The hole in my heart
That remained after he left
Can never be filled

You cannot be him
He is the one I think of
Every day and night.

It all amounts to
an awkward brunch and a wave.
Glad it was worth it.

How dare you.
You are full of lies.
Pretending that you love her because it's
"that day"
And people have
"expectations"
of you.
It's insulting that you could possibly think you are fooling anybody.
Anyone could see through the cheap candy and drugstore card.
You're only pretending.

What does it feel like
to be abandoned by hope?
A hole in your heart.

Sometimes, when it feels like I am drowning in my problems,
I wish I was five again.
So I could just hug my teddy bear and all of my problems would disappear.
Like magic.

You do not know me
The mask I wear when I'm with
you is an image.

I can’t be the girl
that’s got it all together
managing all that life throws at her
and still keeping a smile on her face
I’m the girl with a panic attack around every corner
who manages to turn a small task
into a mental breakdown

I can’t be the girl
who’s happy just to be on this earth
smiling at your sweet words
even on the worst of days
I’m the girl that wakes up most days
wishing she never existed
because that would be better
than living as a complete failure

I can’t be the girl
who believes you when you say
“i love you”
accepting your compliments
and knowing she is beautiful
I’m the girl that sees every part of herself as a flaw
and can’t understand how you could love
someone completely worthless

I can’t be that girl.
I'm just me.