As I read the through words that I wrote,
I realise that most are untrue,
I realise that I was an idiot,
but dear god did I love you.

I loved you like Icarus loved his freedom,
so much that he touched the sun,
because you were all of my everything,
and I thought you were the one.

I loved you like Achilles loved Patroclus,
so much that your loss broke my soul,
and I dreamed of touch in my nightmares,
and the way that you made me feel whole.

I loved you like Dante loved Beatrice,
so much that he went through hell,
because ******* it I'd have done anything,
for you to have loved me as well.

But you're so far away,
and you love someone new,
so I have to pretend,
that I only loved you.

But what do I do with the letters,
with the words that still hold all your love,
some days I just want to burn them,
and as the wind takes the ashes, rise above.

But others I sit and I read them,
and remember when you felt that way,
and breaks my heart when I read them,
because **** it I've got more to say
.
The letter I wrote you sits on my bedside,
I read it again every day,
because I'm haunted by the things have happened,
and by the things that I still need to say.

I should have kissed you longer,
I should have made you stay,
I said I would make it work,
I said you wouldn't slip away.

But **** it, now you love him,
and now I'm just a memory
but you must know I love you,
and I long for you and me.

You belong in his poems, so why do I write?
Why are you still, the most beautiful sight?
You'll never want me, those chances are gone,
I know that. I do, and I've more than moved on.
But you were my muse, for such a long time,
and somehow you still, make my heart rhyme.

They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions,
so maybe this is just my retribution,
but I wasn't the one who gave up and broke our promises,
and now I know that there is no solution.

I loved, and I lost, so now I pay the cost,
and this is it.

Pearl, do you remember, the fifth of November,
When fireworks lit up the sky?
We lay in the sand, and I held your hand,
as you curled up in my arms.

Or perhaps you recall, that late night phone call,
when I told you I had a crush.
I didn't want to say, you made me anyway,
and I am so glad that I did.

How about the day, we got carried away,
when I invited you to see the dogs?
That very first kiss, is something I miss,
I knew that I wanted more.

Then when the party came, things were never the same,
we had an amazing night.
You were all mine, the world seemed fine,
and I was awed by every kiss.

And our very first date, you taught me to ice-skate,
though I wasn't any good.
So I sat in the stand, yes I sat and I planned,
and I finally asked you out.

Then our days in the sun, became second to none,
as our exams approached.
We sat in the park, and kindled our spark,
and I fell asleep on your lap.

A little later a different park, our meetings now held in the dark,
but they were so perfect.
Kisses were stolen and hands were held, my feelings for you they only swelled,
you became my world.

Then nights were spent by your side, sure one day you'd be my bride,
happy beyond belief.
I slept so well with you right there, you calmed each fear took away each care,
more than you will know,

That first kiss after weeks apart, set a fire within my heart,
that weekend was perfect.
I loved every second I could spend with you, I loved every second every of thing we'd do,
it was so hard to leave.

Weeks of nothing then two weeks of you, never was a love so true,
what a perfect time.
Cuddles, museums, and the zoo, I loved every single date with you,
it was so perfect.

But the best things are those we've not yet seen, our greatest kiss it's not yet been,
not if I can help it.

So anyway, all this to say,
I've missed you more than anything, to this day I still wear your ring.
I would love to be back in your narrative,
and I'll be there in my dreams where you still have me.

I hate my poetry