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adept Jun 2018
i don’t know what to do with myself

i am, on my own, putting myself into even deeper trouble.

and this time i looked up, thinking that would make me stop digging deeper.

but i have come to realize that it didn’t stop me

and that i am in the midst of my inevitable and predicted downfall.
adept May 2018
when you learned how to sleep with your
eyes open, you also climbed out of our grave
from six feet under. i stayed behind, and that's okay...
adept May 2018
we cluelessly create conversation
suddenly unaware of the world around us,
out of care and out of loyalty for the people we claim to love.
i am so sorry, i even convinced myself that this was the truth
adept May 2018
i dug with my own hands
and my own shovel.
only to find that,
fires can’t burn six feet under.
adept May 2018
it was all fun and games until it wasn't.
running around in circles, a mind and matter situation.
adept May 2018
Why is it always the best people that we lose first?

since i was young i was told
over and over again
that life wasn't fair,
everything happens for a reason,
and that when we look at death
we have to see that person and know we will
see them again in the future.
but i look at it now and
don't understand anymore.

if everything happens for a reason
then explain this to me, how could
someone bring bad and suffering upon
a person knowingly? why would you do
this if you know it will hurt others?

it's in times like this i tend to lose my sanity,
hope, and faith.
5-18-18
adept May 2018
i almost feel bad, then i remember you deserve it.
you deserve all the wrong that could be felt,
and everyone tells me to forgive, but how can i
when you gave me something i will never forget?

and even still no one understands.
even if they act like they do.

it was your actions that gave me trust issues
and because of that, the "i love you" that is
supposed to come from the heart, is all a lie.
not everything is as good as it seems
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