It's 9 p.m. where you are
Not where I am
because you left
I know

I don't think you think about me still
Pacing in the shadow of my windowsill
wondering if I should tell you, I love you still
I want things to change but I don't think they will

Love is not nearly as fragile a thing as time
When the winds of life have come to pass
all we're left with is a participation trophy
and a blurry past

Ocean waves wash over me
I like the stains they leave
Upon my skin that's now paper thin
as the years pass me by

I am suffocated by the thought of losing you
so much so that may I take one last breath
yet I have one more thing to say before I rest

If you really loved me... you would never have left

It's 9 p.m. where you are
Not where I am
because you left
I know

I don't think you think about me still
Pacing in the shadow of my windowsill
wondering if I should tell you, I love you still
I want things to change but I don't think they will

Love is not nearly as fragile a thing as time
When the winds of life have come to pass
all we're left with is a participation trophy
and a blurry past

Ocean waves wash over me
I like the stains they leave
Upon my skin that's now paper thin
as the years pass me by

I am suffocated by the thought of losing you
so much so that may I take one last breath
yet I have one more thing to say before I rest

If you really loved me... you would never have left

If every rose be red
And every violet, blue
Then perhaps every path
Will lead me back to you

It's not that
I didn't know what I had
It's just that
I never thought I'd lose it

I am not a number
I am not 2200
or 3.3
I am not this these things you claim me to be

I am not a number
I am not Candidate #15392701
or Profile 235
I am real... I am alive

I am not a number
I am not 8/10 on a good day
or a 5/10 when I don't care
There's a mind and soul where you believe is bare

I am not a number
I am not what you need me to be
I am everything you wish to be
I am ... infinity

I killed a butterfly today  
then tried to write a poem  
I don’t know why I did it  
It died without a home  
It struck me as compelling  
as I recalled what my parents used to say  
be mindful of your surroundings  
a flap of butterfly wings can change a day  


I thought little of it then  
yet now I obsess as I reminisce  
if a butterfly flap can change so much  
what of the absence of it?  
Have I sealed my fate to infamy  
or paved my way to riches  
but maybe if I **** another?  
my unforeseeable fate switches  


But what’s a butterfly to me?  
it wasn’t much before  
now you expect me to believe  
it holds the key to what’s in store?  
Free will must exist  
at least as long as I believe it to  
foolish of me to think my dead butterfly  
could have some affect on you  


Yet I sit here thinking  
of thoughts I’ve never had  
a liar I would be to tell you  
that I haven’t changed a tad  
It did not have a name  
and I did not have a reason  
yet as I blankly stared down  
I felt as if I had committed treason  


So I sweep away the body  
and leave the room to clear my head  
if my hand’s never clapped  
this butterfly would not be dead  
so be wary of the change you bring  
the waves you choose to make  
that butterfly could have changed a day  
and not believing that was my mistake