When i think of all the people i love
If i were to die tonight
Theres a lot who wouldnt come to mind
But who gave me light
Theres ppl who wouldnt even make my list
But who have made my life livable for at least a little bit

All the things you think youd never do
Things that would never happen to you

**
I would never
I said
I wouldnt ever
I thought
Im living a joke
At least i can laugh
Thats my joy and my craft
I do ****, ive been thru ****
Im not proud to admit
But i love myself always
Thru all of it
Forgiveness is hard
Moving forward is harder
One step forward
That ones a non-starter
Is it in the cards or
Is this pain just fodder
For my art or
Am i really moving

Tell me god
How am i doing?
Were you a **** up like me?
Did you **** Mary of Magdalene?
Did your parents disapprove?
Were you in love, unmoved?
Unshaken by the fear and hatred
By the biases that make people say ****

You lived with the sinners
You must have been one
Is my line in the sand thinner?
What misdeeds did you consider?

Tell me. Am i like you?
Were your senses alive? All five?
Did you embrace them or hide?
Did you hate your skin?
Or did your sensuality thrive?
Did you never touch your disciples
With amorous love?
Almighty, human, spirit, dove

How can you be human
Without being broken?
Without hurting and being hurt, your claim is token
Cant have spoken on the human condition
Without having lived it
Without having given and taken 
What is this life for
But to **** up and love more?
To tip the balance to love over hate
To hurt people some, play the *****
Learn your goodness aint innate
It grates on my nerves
Claim to serve
Cling to words
In a book used to curse
The broken and hurt

What the **** is life worth
If you dont get to live?

Lord forgive me my sins
Forgive those who sin against me
And let me fall into temptation
Deliver me to evil
For that is our kingdom
Humanity's glory
Amen