Dear whoever reads this,
There is nothing for me here.I don’t want to go on. I didn’t mean to hurt anyone. Please believe me. I love you all so very much. And I don’t want to hurt you anymore.
Everyone say that you are meant to feel safe whenever you go to school. I don’t I have to work into expecting to get bullied and get **** written on the wall about me. I feel like no one loves me not even my own family. Death doesn’t even want me and that’s saying something.
I wish it was just as easy as saying One, Two, Three and I’d be gone.
I made so many memories with my friends and my family.
But this period of time has just been so ****. My family has started to fight more and has started to hate me more. As I sit in class wondering what I’m going to do at recess. Oh no that’s right I have to hide in a ******* bathroom to eat my food because I’m afraid what people are going to think about me.
It *****… It really does… I’ve put my family through a lot… Maybe that’s why they hate me because I’m a fat, ugly, waste of space that no one wants.
I hate being judged I hate not having clothes that fit me and having to wear the same clothes for at least 2 weeks straight. I’m always going to school and getting letters home saying you owe the school more than $800. Dad says he is going to sort it out he’ll find the money but he never will. I’ve had all these thoughts pile up in my head now that I can’t even think anymore… I want it to stop.
I need it to stop cutting myself everyday is not just enough I need to go deep or hang myself or I could try overdosing again. Whatever I decide I know it’s for the best… I’ll miss you guys so much…Things just seemed to go too wrong too many times
Goodbye,
Hannah Field
Dear Dad,
I’m sorry I continue to disappoint you, I’m sorry I’ve changed. I wish we could rewind. I love you death and I will still love you after. But I just couldn’t do it anymore. Everyday became harder and harder(hey at least there will be two positives to my death your smokes will still always be there and you don’t have to put up with me always getting suspended and fighting you) I know you can’t understand and I don’t expect you to. And I don’t know what else to tell you expect I really am sorry but I know you won’t believe me. I’m sorry…
I love you all so very much and I'll miss you guys
