i am trying to find
the advantage
in the disadvantage

how is it possible

to easily forget my name

if there is more to this life
without you in it

i wish to go blind
because i rather wait
for another lifetime

to see the world
with you by my side

i am starting to come to terms
that i cannot have everything in life

i just wish i knew earlier
that included you

i wish there was something more
i could do
to be more perfect like her

i wish there was something more
i could do
to have you love me like her

i wish there was something more
i could do
to have never seen you & her

i wish there was something more
i could do
to have never given you to her

i wish there was something more
i could do
to be her

it is starting to feel painful
being the only one
to still have love
for you & i

i was scared of the commitment
you were begging for me to give
because i could never commit to myself