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20.4k · Feb 2015
musical lovemaking
susan Feb 2015
at long last
he sings a song for me
i watch and i am enraptured
   by the melody
each strum of the guitar strings
   quicken my heart a beat
every note he sings
feels like soft breath against my neck
   making me woozy

he glances up, catches my eye
   and winks

i am doomed.
4.3k · Dec 2015
susan Dec 2015
my wild heart
beats excitedly
feeling overwhelmed
with desire

soft caresses
quicken the pulse
sending it into a whirlwind
of hypnotic feelings

control is lost
falling from fingertips
by prickles of need

not satisfied
until flesh meets flesh
ending with the exhaustion
and perspiration
of spent love
cradled by desires
susan Aug 2015
a babe
having a baby
thinking all is just rosy
cute lil nose
   wiggly toes
soft skin
   cute laugh
fashionable clothes
teeny, tiny shoes
in all colors...
little hands reaching
to capture your heart


ear shattering screams
   dream stomping cries
wretchedly soiled diapers
chicken pox
   ear ache
tooth aches
   bruised knees
stitched cuts
school friends
   best friends
   first loves
soft crying from her room

but always

little hands reaching
to capture your heart.
mark and tori, it won't be easy
but you'll always have the one thing that trumps all others,
you will always have love.
3.6k · May 2015
gone too soon
susan May 2015
i'm humbled being here
and i'm not sure why

i'm visiting
so i'm allowed

   so many
the stones seem to go on forever
and i dare not step on one
that would be disrespectful
so i walk around
  sometimes hop
if it's last minute

and i find him

  a grey stone
     a military stone
a proud army man
but how proud can you be
   after the fact
i clean it up
   the stone
brush off the dirt, dried leaves
   so i can look

   and i look

reading his name
my heart skips a beat
    my throat constricts
my stomach hurts

i miss him
       my dad
i surely, truly
   miss him

but it doesn't really matter, does it
he's not coming back
   he's gone

  and i'm left here
to figure things out by myself

and it hurts.
3.6k · Jan 2016
gone too soon
susan Jan 2016
i grieve almost daily
for the girl i once was

losing yourself
grips your soul
like a predictable
3.0k · Oct 2014
skewed integrity
susan Oct 2014
give me shelter
from these thoughts
that can destroy me
offer me protection
from words
that are better left unsaid
release me
from the prison
of my mind
that forces me to become
a suffragette
for causes i don't believe in
offer me my courage
let me take back my strength
so i can rebuild the morality
of the person i once was.
2.6k · Jan 2015
intelligent confrontation
susan Jan 2015
so many loud yelps
barking voices
clacking at each other
believing that their ignorance
and unabashed rudeness
will get results

   hurray for the strong shouldered
head held high
who ignore such brazen brashness
of the moronic

   bravo to you
that can stop an imbecile
dead in his tracks
by a stone cold
   even gazed
     eye meet eye

stopping the foolish without uttering a word.
2.3k · Mar 2015
intellectual stimulation
susan Mar 2015
i don't want to be bothered
      by mediocre
show me weird
        and we'll talk.
susan May 2015
“Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny.”*

i toss in restless sleep
and wake with pain in my heart

the lifelong fight i have fought
   for a love never given
is coming to an end

i have not won
   nor lost
but come to accept what is

i'm left with a sadness...
   but also deliverance
from the constant need of approval
that would never have come.
1.7k · Feb 2015
blue collar
susan Feb 2015
i love the look of
a hard working man
   the sweat
    the grit
     the dirt
are a complete and total
   turn on
no shower is necessary
just bring your filthy *** over here
and gimme some.
1.5k · Mar 2015
susan Mar 2015
i like having you around
   you always have my back
i could steal
and ******
and i know you'll always be there for me
you're my muse
   my confidant
     my partner in crime
you build me up
push me
with your skewed ideas of nirvana
but i follow
because you know what's right for me
and you will protect me...always
for you are my alter ego
you are the warrior that has captured my mind


living in your darkness
gives me an escape
helps me reach my true desires
for i'll always have you
to defend me

my friend.
1.5k · Sep 2018
susan Sep 2018
a breath of fresh air
that's what you are

so new
pure of thought

unveiling love
with a tender touch
for me
brushing your cheek
across mine
making my heart melt
with your smile

i thought i knew love
then came you.
my granddaughter, my love, my son's child
i will protect and love you always
1.4k · Sep 2015
a simple girl
susan Sep 2015
when i look at her
i see a simple girl
someone with no expectations
someone content with
   what she has
not wanting more
   always smiling
even when humiliated
   she laughs
thinks every thing's funny
   and is happy
she can make others laugh too
   even if it's at her own expense
she doesn't ask for much
   no demands
   never pouts
just flows through life
   almost nonexistent
not many would notice if she left
   or didn't come
there might be a few probable
   tsk tsk's
   if she passed
but this is the path she chose
this is the path she follows
   though pathetic to some
to her
   this is her life.
1.4k · Dec 2014
susan Dec 2014
approaching the day
with a great anticipation
of good times
and laughter
starting out with a glass of wine
taking it slowly
feeling a lightness in spirit
and promise
desire, maybe
nothing too extreme
holding onto certainty
welcoming the concrete assurance
of merriment
1.4k · Sep 2019
the relationship
susan Sep 2019
she: what is it about me?
he: what do you mean?
she: me...?
he: uh...
she: what don't i have?
he: uh...
she: i'm overweight...
he: um...
she: i'm unattractive
he: what?...
she: i'm boring
he: no...
she: i'm dumb
he: uh, well....
she: i give up
he: well, i....
she: nope, that's it, i give up
he: oh, come on...
she: quit trying to talk me out of it
he: i was only...
she: i'm done, good bye
he: wait, what, where are you...
she: have a good life
he: what about dinner?
1.4k · Aug 2015
broken dreams
susan Aug 2015
walking along
the cobble ****** street
i drop pieces
of my shattered dreams
to be swept up
by the street cleaner
and deposited
into a pile of *******.
i can almost see the shards
1.4k · Dec 2015
to grudgingly reunite
susan Dec 2015
it would be easy
taking you back
easing on in
to the old routine
of you hurting me with actions
me hurting you with words
both numb
rolled out
stamped into shape
day after day
until the smiles turn to smirks
and thoughts of your touch
   make me cringe in disgust
phone calls go unanswered
   then unattempted
i won't see you for days
   and smile about it

yeah, it would be easy
taking you back

much more difficult
starting something new.
1.3k · Apr 2015
torn apart
susan Apr 2015
bounced around from here to there
this girl didn't know
     where to call home
mommy loves her
   daddy loves her more
but she doesn't feel it
never did
maybe never will
so she'll seek love
spend her lifetime looking for it
not trusting what is presumed real
going from him to him
   a her in between
never fully satisfied
they all love her
this one more than the last
that one more than this
but she does not feel it
and she grows cold
     but still
she continues on her search
for that one true love
that she may not ever find.
1.3k · Apr 2015
one night stand...
susan Apr 2015
i spotted you among the crowd
and our eyes met for a second
   a split second
but that was enough
for in that moment
i felt a warmth fill me
   top to bottom
and i knew
yes, i knew
i had to have you

by the end of the night
we had our first date

in the back seat of your car.
...nothing wrong with that
susan Nov 2014
feels like i'm always throwing something out there
only to have it bounce back at me
obviously unimpressive
to anyone

why are some conceptions
disregarded as nothing
by so many

kinda makes me want to quit
kinda makes me want to chuck it all
give up
throw in the towel
raise my hands in surrender
and be done with it all

but i won't
i'll keep tossing
with stubborn determination
knowing that one day
i'll electrifyingly amaze
the right person!
1.2k · Feb 2015
susan Feb 2015
interfused rhymes
   that flow easily on paper
mingled words
   that make the heart melt
smooth verses
   capturing a story
people falling in love
   people falling out of love


all blended together
to produce the perfect

a poem.
1.2k · Oct 2014
a rant
susan Oct 2014
get away from me all you fools
store owners
underpaid store clerks
delivery people
disgruntled factory workers
know it alls
child molesting priests
loud mouthed reverends
track armed hookers
johns who's wife won't give it up
shady lawyers
pill poppin' doctors
kids with colds
old people with dementia
***** dogs
feral cats
evil grandmas
perverted grandpas
street sweepers
***** garbage men
slick bartenders
drunk people
people high on life
dope heads
meat heads
sober judges
all of you
go to hell in a handbasket
and let me live my life
in peace.
1.1k · Apr 2015
susan Apr 2015
i apologize for the foul language

wow, what a beautiful sunny day
hmm, i have a taste for a piece of chocolate
alright! not much traffic
i want a piece of chocolate
awesome! a parkin' spot right in front
i really need a piece of chocolate
yes! boss isn't in yet
i have to get a piece of chocolate
another plus, not too much on the agenda today
where is that piece of chocolate i had in my desk
computer on, ready to chocolate
******* it! who took my piece of chocolate
where's those *chocolate
mother *******, i'll **** whoever took
my last ******* chocolate!

why is that phone chocolate?
if i go to that ******* machine and
there's no effin' chocolate somebody's *** is chocolate!

would somebody please answer that dang chocolate!


i have no change for chocolate
who's got change for a chocolate?
somebody gimme 4 chocolates for a chocolate
so i could please get chocolate!?


i'm going to chocolate so i could get a... chocolate

c h o c o l a t e
kinda silly
but i just discovered the word monomania
and tried to use the meaning in a poem
1.1k · Mar 2015
waiting to be touched
susan Mar 2015
my heart has been touched
many a time
but my soul
   ah, my soul
remains virginal.
1.1k · Nov 2014
a simple exclamation of love
susan Nov 2014
if you throw a pebble at my window
i will let you in.
1.1k · Dec 2015
susan Dec 2015
i don't like people
questioning me
looking at me
trying to figure me out


there's no rhyme
to my reason
no "aha" moments
to be had

there's no book
more open
nothing more readable
than me

if you want to get to know me

just be

we'll find each other.
1.0k · Jan 2016
susan Jan 2016
drifting upon
the waves of hypocrisy
being kept afloat
by the lies i've told
all it takes
is one proven truth
to puncture
the shell of my being
and leave me sinking
towards the bottom
to rest upon
the sands of my betrayal.
1.0k · Oct 2014
susan Oct 2014
it surrounds me
it follows me
tries to consume me
the fight is tough
the urge to give in is strong,
strength builds character
certainty produces confidence
this war can be won
the crusade towards happiness
is closer than once
978 · Dec 2014
naughty, not nice
susan Dec 2014
i find myself filled with
zealous animosity
while observing the happy go lucky
faces of holiday revelers
i'm overtaken by a jealous urge
to deflate their wonderment and joy
                            somehow, someway

   would tripping one of them
as they walk by me
be too obvious
   would swiping the candy cane
from a rosy cheek brat
give away my true state of mind
   would throwing tomatoes at the parade santa
label me as a scrooge

these thoughts haunt me
i despise being eaten away by the exact frame of mind
i wouldn't tolerate from others
only the year before

hopefully this unintentional insanity
is short lived
hopefully my emotional strength of wills
will ground me...once again
for this me is not the me i want to spend
the remainder of my days with
putting it into words helps, always
970 · Nov 2014
let it go
susan Nov 2014
guilt is overrated
so too is an overactive conscience

to be burdened emotionally
with another's cruelty
is ludricous

independence of a warped mind
is attainable
for spiritual freedom
working on achieving exactly this
926 · Jul 2019
susan Jul 2019
grabbing a handful
of old photos
i remember times
of true happiness
of doubt
and pain
of self loathing
and hurt

i remember
not being good enough
trying too hard
trying too little
blaming the wrong people
loving the wrong person

but you
you were my

you gave my life

you made me

you made me
and then
   with feelings of
undying love
with feelings of
not being good enough
with feelings of
with you

you've proved

you are perfect
to me

you give love

you are good

you are

and she will be
891 · Aug 2015
a conscientious proposition
susan Aug 2015
if it takes one of us
to act grown up & rational
i nominate you

i'm too uptight
to fake composure.
881 · May 2015
susan May 2015
"be happy!
don't be sad!"
sounds fine and dandy
but what if i'm happy
being sad

sadness takes genius
to keep going
it isn't easy
holding a down turned
   wet eyes
     despairing demeanor
'woe is me' content
but i favor it
to the false bravado
by the eternally joyous

give me a good cry
compared to a forged belly laugh
after a lame joke
any day!
876 · Nov 2014
total sarcasm (or is it)
susan Nov 2014
are my words too dire
does my life seem too
lonely or
because i am not
lonely or
cruel...well, maybe sometimes
albeit unintentionally

i'm great!
look at my smile!
see me grin!
hear me laugh!
i am wonderfully, blissfully,
joyfully on cloud 9 (give or take)!
842 · Jun 2015
con artist
susan Jun 2015
i find no honesty
    in a toothy grin satisfaction
     in a winking eye
your words of worship
the flattery you toss
your praise
your claim of undying love

the day i see truthfulness in your stare
              feel true compassion within your arms
               and only then
will i welcome you
into my untainted
832 · Oct 2014
tag along
susan Oct 2014
accepting the unacceptable
to accept
while trying to be accepted

believing the unbelievable
so to believe
in something

tolerating the unethical
to hide weakness
and deny decency

following the wicked
because of vulnerability and hopelessness

never comprehending truth
because of rejecting it for so long.
787 · Apr 2015
susan Apr 2015
looking back and forth
from you
   to her
     to them
        & the others
and i wonder...
who of you are sincere
which of you go home in complete & utter contentment?

wearing plastic smiles
             coifed hair
      painted eyes
   and lips
          sprinkled &  spritzed
                   iron out
     blown out
      shaken & tousled
for what?

to add to the alcohol induced facade
   of the similar?

no, i am not unique

i'm just better at showing what's real
than most.
susan Mar 2015
walking through the park
people watching
eyeing the entertainment
a clown twisting balloons
into obscure shapes
and telling people
'it's a dog'
'it's a monkey'
and those same people
grinning enthusiastically and exclaiming
'it is, it is!!!'
while walking away
pulling junior by his arm
'hurry up'
the balloon lasts 5 minutes
usually less
before junior
trying to choke the 'doggie'
busts the balloons...

...and then we're left with
a screaming

i turn my attention to the pond
ducks, geese, a swan or two (i think)
moving gracefully
on the water
until one duck
smaller than the rest
starts quacking anxiously
obviously distressed
and i turn to see it caught up in a tangle of discarded
fishing twine
his terror obviously alarming the others
and then there's a spectacle
of quaking, splashing birds and people
while a few good hearted samaritans rush to
save the duck
eventually a beat cop arrives
shooing people away
while saving the day using his handy
sport knife to cut away the twine and set the bird free
taking a small bow to the crowd of people cheering

moving along
i come to a street vendor
selling ice cones, pop, cotton candy and popcorn
so i stop for a small ice cone
treating myself
walking along
enjoying the scene
i notice a few kids laughing and pointing
i shrug it off until a kindhearted old lady
'your face is blue, dear'
taking out my compact mirror
i do see that my face is indeed blue
   the ice cone
which i unceremoniously dump into the next waste bin
trying in vane to scrub the blue off of my face
with a slowly shredding napkin
i take the path to the nearest exit
out of the park

so much for a relaxing stroll in the park
on a beautiful spring day.
776 · Sep 2014
susan Sep 2014
push push push
push push push
a swish of a tail
a scuttling under the bed
diamond green eyes searching, trusting
a nudge at my foot
push push push
a smile crosses my lips
i reach for you
hug nothing but pillow
my eyes mist over
my heart aches
hush hush now
go to sleep
i got you
right here
you'll always be right here
767 · Nov 2014
susan Nov 2014
a solid rain
washing, purifying
presenting a chance
for a new start
standing in the downpour
looking up
embracing the baptism
for a chance
to start again.
755 · Dec 2014
scent of pine
susan Dec 2014
breathing in the scent of pine*
is it too cliche to say it opens up memories
of christmas's past?
do i need to light a pine scented candle
in order to get into the spirit?
   i do
     i will
if that's what it takes.
750 · Jun 2015
senseless words
susan Jun 2015
dew drops
rain drops
lemon drops
dropped ball
drop kick
side kick
kick in the ***
jack of all trades
jack of hearts
break my heart
break up
up your ***
up up and away

i love words.
susan Dec 2017
i cannot dream
when my thoughts
are stilted

my brain feels tilted
stemming rational thoughts
from flourishing

things around me
seemed blurred

my observances
are skewed

regular rights
are wronged

rational thoughts

i don't belong

and the comfort i feel
with that agreement
leaves me all the more

740 · Jun 2015
susan Jun 2015
do you ever look at a little kid
bouncing a ball
and just want to take that ball
and bounce it off his head?

no, me neither.
732 · Jun 2015
a soul cleansing
susan Jun 2015
i've opened my arms
and tossed the feelings
of my soul
         to the world

     take them

give them back to me
      purified of dirt
and wholesome
   and i'll cradle them tightly
against my chest
      to be soaked up
by my heart.
726 · Apr 2015
silent scream
susan Apr 2015
i keep calling
and calling
from deep within my soul
but no one answers
no one heeds my pleas
i feel thoroughly alone

the one time i ask for help
and no one is around to answer
726 · Nov 2014
susan Nov 2014
leaving this world
and entering mine
comforts me
like a warm blanket.
725 · Sep 2017
our life
susan Sep 2017
come forward
and enter my life
take the blows
meant for me
wallow in my pain
rejoice in my good fortune
trip over my mistakes
suffocate the uneasiness
i feel at times
take it all away from me
live it
summarize it
breathe your findings
into my ear.
720 · Nov 2015
silly boy
susan Nov 2015
a boy with bright blue eyes
as he snatches the purse
and runs off crookedly
   bumping into people
   knocking down old ladies
   kicking dogs out of the way
running far enough
out of sight
   and sound
to drop the purse
without opening it
into the trash.
709 · Nov 2018
susan Nov 2018
love, untethered
may capture
the wrong
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