She's sneeky and clever,
Who fools us all,
Tearing up our floorboards and socks,
But so dainty and small.
She begs for a dropping,
I' m not to give her a thing,
She becomes jubilant and untamed,
Hiding under our beds and chewing up our wires,
Chaos, she does bring.
Driving us up the wall,
Barking at innocent men,
She is superior above us all,
She's Sandy, till the the end.

In the glow of satisfaction
after we are spent from passion
I watch you dress up
You button your shirt
One at a time.
Am sorry to see the expanse of chest go
We talk
About what you want
You tell me you're addicted
To everything about me
Don't mind being a Slave
To my every need.
I hug you
Try to fit myself as close as I can
Hoping to block out the loneliness
you are like a healing balm.
I wish you could stay
Hold me close all night.
Cover my face, palms, shoulder
with drops of little kisses.
I want you to stay
some night, every night.
with you am losing the pain
I like how you invade me.

Every night,
When sleep eludes me and my thoughts turn dark,
I stare out my window at the blue moonlit street,
And in my mind I imagine myself walking
Down the sidewalk, across the road,
My hands shoved in my pockets and my collar up
To shield me against the cool wind of the night.

I can see myself walking for miles—
I know every twist and turn of the pavement by heart—
Until I’ve reached the edge of town,
This town that has ripped me to shreds and burned the pieces,
And I know that I’m so close to freedom…
Just one small step over the city limits,
Into no man’s land.

But it’s just a silly daydream, I tell myself,
Back in the prison I call reality. Yet
I can’t help but wonder what would happen
If I were to one day walk out the door, not just in my thoughts,
Without a word, without an intention of ever returning.
Would anyone look for me?
Would anyone cry or miss me?
Would anyone even care if I disappeared forever?

we lay together,
surrounded in silence,
an uncomfortable gloom.

i lose the battle,
"flesh on flesh...
wounds bleed fresh."

alone with you beside me,
"every inch of my tar black soul,"
a fake bled into a dry life.

A purr awakens me,
urges me to write,
words haunt me and
i can't get them out.

i'm stuck in this limbo
wishing i had something
a little stronger than
a bit of sweet iced tea.

"he loves me with every beat,"
of a straightedge heart
and i thought
we could be happy.

a slice of life,
a pit of sorrow,
a hell in my mind.

sleeping and worrying.
hoping that the world will just spill out?
that might be awhile.

i love you.



xoxo