Which are often spelled as doughnuts.

My confession comes next.

I thought about those donuts a lot, and wondered if it is the jam or the crispy sugar coat which is the main delight.

So guiltily thought of visiting while in Portmadog and eating one without you and then feeling the need to confess on meeting with you.

Even pushed the door yet they were closed.

The alternative was Spooners yet even there would not be the same without your company, so went to the Port and just had coffee.

Bought a pack of donuts in Tesco before catching the bus.

On return see on Social media that Spooners was closed for refurbishment anyhow.

I hope it don’t snow.

Hoping you have had a good week also, maybe with some donuts…

With all this talk of donuts, remembered Mum taking us to an ideal home exhibition at the Wiinter Gardens and she bought a metal donut implement to fry batter.

Delicious.

Note..If you are arrived in Blaenau early on Tuesday, the Model Bakery there used to/may have donuts, the heaviest I have ever eaten…

That got me through the first months on my own.

Looking up observe the doll has dusty hair.

the mass, the clouds lay heavy, rain that came, that blinded again. blinded those that could not see the love and idle artefacts, each one a statement of nothing in particular.

we look for sand

there is a nice long beach and lovely views out to sea

the sea that is rising

( notes on darkness) more fairy lights is all that is needed, radio music, and padding about really….

while in the studio a series
commenced

marching in time
across the board

at dusk the view magnetic

most of it works now,
memory plays a part,
when we look
to the mountain.

student of timetables

me

now with a free pass to most places

the official times

saved to my phone and noted on paper in my back pocket , nearly lost in the chip shop that only accepts cash

it fell yet we saw it and retrieved

1.28 pm the bus home so we gets there real early and waits

by the walker

he had trecked from forden the three miles up and down

used to the flatness of portsmouth wanted a ride back yet nothing forthcoming limped his return

1.50 pm with no bus arrived the timetable lady was contacted and she explained the bus was due at 2.30 pm that my internet were wrong and no one was bothered what it said at bus stops

on her say so

nipped round to the toilets then waited patiently to 2.30 when a bus arrived going the wrong way

spoke to the timetable lady who admitted being wrong that the 1.30 came in late possibly while i was in the toilets

the next correct and last bus now 3.30 pm

i wondered what to do if that one did not arrive and secured an unnecessary plan

fortunate to afford

when safely aboard thought of those recently waiting at airports to escape

my small adventure was as nothing

sat on the town hall steps in the late september sun

there is a nice long beach and lovely views out to sea


the sea that is rising

it came shiny
lovely at 45 degree angle

oh no
he said
this is the wrong one

there is a nice long beach and lovely views out to sea

the sea that is rising

so the falling days,
end today, winter waits,
and the songs, and words,
tunes are all to warm us,
and hold us safe

stains the cup if left standing,

remember the hotel, 1964,

we used to scour them especially

round the handle, then the base.

that feeling that arrives with the name of the county

the memory of your home and closeted life
now eroding slowly

that sense of belonging to the land

it is that feeling

some things fade with time,
with sun and washings.

this one remained bright,
even glaring

it was
the dream

the cloud
the quarry

water flows down this valley

wind blows round our houses

snakes figure a bit here since
i saw that one in the
famous old painting with a egg
in its mouth

yes

so I won the challenge yesterday
and have set a new one
will judge it on may 4th

not saying much of intelligence
really

the weather is beautiful here
all sunshine and bird song

so I guess they will come
and turn places into car parks
again

even though buses are provided

i did not want to win though

no major side effects except dreams of side effects

it all starts here today
and will take a long time

there are so many many of us
lots upon lots

though early the lanes are clear
he sees no one
only the ice and frost

goes tentatively in the wrong boots

imagines the slipping so moves
the phone to a front pocket in

case

his imagination runs riot
as before and remembering

not to use the first word
that comes in his mind

or too many recognizable
cliches james

so we talked about dna alterations
those tracking devices they say are
inserted

and laughed over the silliness
of our conversation and then

i drew the tidy face and then

the scaffolders came

should that dot be approved

and how about the predicted?

we came here early with many thoughts and remnants of the dream

it was another lockdown

with discussions on milk

that seemed important

then we heard voices distant, watched with a comma, saw the group walking the lane early

red tops and shorts

six thirty a.m.

do not feel so great, again today.

i wanted to be european.

a bigger picture.

was mentioned that people turn it back to themselves

tried it and found it so

that or not showing care
for the deep ness of it all

maybe i shall not go to dunster again

after all

and shall miss it

&

more

will miss you…..

.note. i never did pronounce dulverton as dulverton…

have a photo here of up the valley
where they used to stook the harvest


all the family out working the fields

in the evening it came cooler
for rest

feels as if. the thing i was doing

has overtaken me.   wealth  has no

agenda,                nor have  capitals.

rules come away. a differing

place,  turning in the year.

it came gently.

we do so many things.

we are no longer afraid.

make the best of summer days,

winter follows.

forgot to say
that one bear
here
now has silk floral pants

as in underwear
not pants as in america

here we say trousers

anyhow there is no photograph

the guy in the charity
says there are no doll’s
clothes in stock

do you say thrift?

6.20am

there is this little corner

tidy now

a niche

which needs a thing to make a point

for it


the storm came yesterday and tired from the work before

browsed the online and found many things

yet know that with time it will sort itself out


just as most places are tidy

the tree came down

and

next door’s shed blew about


it feels quieter this morning

an osprey flew down the estuary late
while I hung out the window
to watch the propellers spin

upwards

yesterday four private planes came
explained by the app

undeniably the white microlight
sounded odd while we shouted

words  lost in air

as a child walked down the airfield to see

the buckle broke
caused great difficulty
in walking

i always like planes Jim

overcast today

while out on a longer walk,

met him and he explained to me,

about walking there and back again

:: you know ::


five men


those men who desire

who speak in three voices


is all i will say here, you know who you are

*

time is upon us as he writes

the old way


dust from the fire

he weaves

remembering the beginning

of it all


ash escapes his brain

into solitude


days left

three voices

rise until just one

is heard

liked in potatoes called spuds

& maybe there was one

covering us

that wore away over years…

well never mind

they say and go get on with it

meanwhile I thought of you back then all those years ago

underlined

no bus arrived the timetable lady was contacted and she explained the bus was due at 2.30 pm that my internet were wrong and no one was bothered what it said at bus stops

he stood like a dancer,
arms out.

he looked
and moved,
like a dancer.

the medicine works

though leaves the passages

dry

triggers sets me thinking of cowboys

we don’t have those here either

"and who allowed you to live a beautiful life?”

you came again in auto fill

last evening sat alone

we still cannot understand

there is no explanation for that

nor what you did

you are a ghost to us now

fading

we watched it on tv

satisfactory arrangement
on the surface

as we know there is much below

it has come warmer here
lately

so me and him cut the saplings
ropes pulling away from the wire

below the ivy threads the surface
to be pulled today as I tested the
method


which worked

plans are set
though news news ain’t good
any which way i look

i read about the dependency
he described
and thought he was more than that

we are not our issues nor experiences
we are more than that

each person a unique being

we need to concentrate on detail

to describe things properly

need to

go there each year a while

to retain to remain in memory

need to

care for  little things

those days we went each year
watched them drive through the
village first

oh the excitement
waving

only they did not come last year
of course and i guess they will

not again this year

i would not mix with a crowd now

would you james?

when I was a kid the elephants
came by train and there was a
procession from the station
through town with performers

all waving

i was scared of the lions and other
creatures

not the elephants nor the clowns
james

i loved them both
and still do

1°
overcast

told them about joan and they said they had to go, get home
later I heard they liked her despite the startled look
she was drawn again yesterday

looking up

see rainbows

&

the small plane still flies over

most days

i spend thirty days writing

one eye closed, storm building.


you never know what goes on

behind the scenes.


there are pictures each day

some seem similar

some seem a memory now.


a daily challenge

grass

holds the sand.

sand holds

the grass.


have you walked the dunes

hollowed path, coconut gorse.


have you found contentment there?


have you sat the sun, black crow bird,

have you closed your eyes at that

within, enjoyed that

without?


the tin hut is still empty.

dry he wore the white dress

his hair curled damply

we drew him

we painted him

he is taller now & remains

much the same

adrift, will the sky at last explode, or will this hate

continue pointlessly, for thousand thousands years.

numbers that cannot describe each particle of pain.

each ****** bomb that kills yet again.

like in a circus those days

now there are no animals
mainly clever folk being smart
or funny

said to come to bed quick

lay down and rest

the warm blanket cosy


make a nest

a bit ******* round

and hopefully it will all go away


i said to the bear, i said that

the washing was left out and I had not washed up yet


dear bear said it did not matter

that care will be taken

and we will not tell the little ones

for fear of worrying them


we watched the sun go down together

skimmed slates that bounced about

unlike the pebbles that grow on our banks here

unlike the landscape hereabouts yet only up the road

up the road where all comes beyond reality to help with reality

serendipidy

all is honesty

i have a witness.

evidence produced.

in white

a mirrored door

all tidy in lockdown

and though it was bought expensive

placed inside it is lost to me now

so use one of the others in the morning

and throughout the day

felt something amiss as we banged into fatigue and slept one hundred years

crusty lipped we search for blistex

then

traditionally use the vaseline