I can safely say
If you picked up the phone
And you called me
Today
Tomorrow
Whenever
I would be so ******* weak

A boy asked me to dinner today
And I said no
I said no
I’m still not over Dillan
He’s all I think about
He’s all I want to be around

Call me

It’s at night when the full glass
Tips over the edge
Spilling and spreading out
Every thought of you
Dillan

Wedding bells
Wedding bells
I can’t stop thinking about
How you put me and her
Through absolute hell

Orange filled the trees
Climbing through the trellis
Rain drops kissing petals
A day of happiness
A day of rejoice

Secret eyes meet
Pick one soft
Honeysuckle
Forbidden sweet
Kissed my lips

Left empty
Smooshed on wet pavement
Stepping stepping
Many feet

I keep thinking about how
It felt like
You
And
Me.

Give me one day of peace
One day where you don’t
Cross my mind

You ****

You will always stop
Time
For me

Lie in your bed
Alone but
Never alone
Lie in it

I can feel you
Thinking about me
I assume
This is the only place
You still see
Maybe not
Maybe I’m crazy

Please
He said
Stop calling me

I am this close
To paying the 36 dollars
To change my number

His words played
Over and over and over

I just missed you
I missed you
So much I can’t breathe

Oh
You
Hate me

I got a tattoo
Of a honeysuckle today
To remind me of you
And that
Rainy
April Day

Pick up the phone
Call me
Please

I miss you

I hope it all makes it’s way to you
Some way
Some how

Don’t you miss me
Isn’t it unbearable
How are you happy
Can I be happy too
Please
Can I be happy too

I still have trouble
Believing
Every moment
Every warm moment
Wrapped in ecstasy
They were all
Lies

You could have said
You don’t want me
And don’t flatter yourself
I didn’t do what I did
Because of you

You are a
liar, coward, cheat

Why did you speak to me?

Was I light reading for the morning
Was I even that anymore
Or did you just erase me
Get rid of me

I really really
Just want you to be happy
I want you to be happy
For the rest of your life
I hope I see you again
Before we die

You can always
Message me here
I’ve blocked you
In every single place you’ve blocked me
I’ve made it to where no one can see
My new phone number
I don’t think you’ll read these
email me
One day
Some day
I will miss you every day
I will try not to
I will wait endlessly to hear from you
Again one day
I will try not to
I’m confused
I want to know why
I want to know what happened
I wish you would have told me
I wish you would have said
Goodbye

I just wanted to know
Why

I hope you think about me
Every
Single
Day

Dear God,
If you have any mercy
Please
I don’t want to think about him anymore
I want to forget his voice
His eyes
His laugh
His smell
Help me let him go
Help me heal
Please show me
I won’t feel this way forever
That he wasn’t the one
That I can get over him

I will get married again.
I will have children again.
I will have a family.
I will grow old without you.
And you.
You will never know what you want.
You will become an old story I tell,
When my grandchildren ask me,
About life
And love.

I loved you.
I loved you.
And
I will never know, what would be.

You are lucky.
Lucky I’m willing to crawl back into my safety
Away from you.
Lucky I haven’t told her everything again.
You are lucky.

Dillan,
You are a coward
I will
Never
Ever
Forgive you.

I cry so deep
I feel the river flowing through
My chest
Deep, white water, ripping through me

I can’t believe you did this
You did this again

You are less like a machine
More like a garden

More water some days
More sun on others

He’s lying next to her
While dreaming of me
And
My bed is cold

I just want to know
Why I wait
Wait wait
In this life
Too

Don’t you see
I’m so in
Love with you
Listen,
I can’t live without you
And I wish you were
Near me now

It’s 9 pm
The tide rolls in
The thoughts of you
You and me
Between these sheets
Hands against my hands

I miss the way you smell
I think of the last time
I buried my face in your chest
That’s when you left

I miss the way you taste
I think of the last time
My lips met your lips

Suddenly time seems like a
Long long hallway
Only extending more and more
The more I walk it

I ******* miss you
And I didn’t want to wait
I didn’t want to wait
To see you
To feel you
To taste you

I want to beg you
On my hands
And my knees
Please
Please

All I can
Think
About is you
And how I must see you

Please,
Come home.

And then,
He was gone

I had him
There
And then,

I watched him
Leave, leave, leave
Right out
That door
There

But oh,
O,
How I ******* missed him
Waiting
And wanting

Have
You
Ever
Craved
Someone?

I miss
Being
Home
With you

I miss putting
My hand
On your face

Everything
Feels so wrong

You there
Me here

I don’t want
To know
That you and her
Are there in that space

I wish
I wish
I wish
You wouldn’t stay

I want
To
Spend
The rest of my life
With you

And
I know
If someone wants you
They will truly do
Anything
To make that happen

It happened for me once.

I was so, so happy
With you

I
*******
Miss you

And
I just want to feel
Your fingers against mine

Please

How long
Do I
Lay in bed
At night


While you lay
Next
To her

I love you, I love you every single day.
When we are frustrated.
When we are cooking.
When you are telling me about your day.
New things.
When you think.
How you are there every time I call.
How you know everything about me, but still learn things about me.
When you are gone.
When you are here.

So if I meant something
Mean it
Mean what you say
And do it
Fire beneath your finger tips
I’ll be ash

You know
I’d do anything
Just for you

And I can’t promise
Ease
I can’t promise
Perfection
But I’ll stand next to you
I’ll hold your hand

And I don’t have much
But I’ll give you everything I have

You know,
I’d do anything,
Just
For
You

Find me in every life,
And lay your sweet lips upon mine,
Steal my breath,
Touch my cheek,
Whisper those words I crave to hear
Dripping
Off your tongue

“That’s life
Why would
It change now”
- still woozy

Breathe
Grit your teeth
Move on
Try to not listen
To the sound
Of the nails
On the chalkboard
Breathe