I wish that i could heal your heart
put the pieces together that were torn apart
     To heal your soul
     Make you feel whole
                        To soothe your head
                        Calm the storm thats left
I wish i could tell you all the answers to the world
Tell you the ending to the story thats left untold
    To start a new beginning
    You have to release the past
This new light before us spinning
Something waiting, begging to last
                       Memories are easily covered
                       The thoughts in our heads being smothered
but you are shining far too bright
      for darkness to unravel
This truth will cause me to fight
even if it leaves me face down in gravel
                     For what is right
                     I will forget the night
An end to the old. The beginning being written.
You are just too fitting.
                                      Page one to our story...

Every day I got a new set of problems
Can't figure out just how to solve em
Each day I find new ways to dodge em
But they keep coming back
Full circle revolver
What's a dollar to a billionaire
Spend all there money on diamonds without a care
Yet none of them seem to be happy
Rolling in cash yet smiling so sadly
Here I am waiting from cent to cent
Trying to afford food gas and rent
But at the end of the day
I can rest easy
Satisfied
Indefinitely ok
Is it the same for you mr. Billionaire?
With your fancy car ladies parties
In the designer clothes you wear
But what I see
All around me
Is beauty in simplicity
Beauty in the struggle
The empty pocket pit
Living off that next pack of Ramon noodles
Pressing on
Never settling
Knowing that your day will come
Because happiness isn't about the things you acquire
It's about the love you spread
The good you transpire
the universe returns to you
Threefold to fulfill selfless desires
Sometimes in wealth
Sometimes in power
You lose yourself
Forget To stop and smell the flowers
But I'll hold my head high
Through the hard times
Wait for the good
Gaze at the stars
And feed my head
With all that's left
The beauty in everything

It took me so long
but now i finally see
it was always you
nothings wrong with me
all i ever did was try to make it worthwhile
all you ever do is take away my smile
you are so miserable
you hate yourself so much
so you try to ruin me
destroy everything you touch
i can't believe you
why can't you see
that the poison that you seep in
is the black inside of me.

I don't know what to do with myself
I can't picture you with someone else
But i gotta do me
I have a few things i need to be
A couple more places to see
Here I am, stuck in the middle again

I did so many things wrong
I pushed away your heart and forgot
what pulled us together in the first place
Was everything really a mistake
I don't know
I'm too numb to even feel right now
I wish someone would take over my mind
and remind me what's real
but here I am alone again
not knowing whether this is the beginning or the end

Lime and limpid green
and all the spaces in between
Yellow and sunshine mellow
walking through void in your travel
Blue stars and purple faces
solid time and desolate places
Wandering through lifes stitched seems
red blood and red opened veins
Pouring sweat driven insane
All too killing color
All too much being smothered
                       So, paint me as you wish.
                       I depart as a canvas.

This is the biology of our brains
pulses moving in between our veins
spaces filled with love so true
cranium filled with thoughts of you
moments in between the lines
deja vu of better days spent next to you

this is the biology of our brains
love so real and love so very strange
addicted to your left side
addicted to your right side mind
lost in transit in your head
love so real it makes you feel it in your pineal

my psychedelic lover
got me running for your cover
my trippy hippy baby
you got me going crazy

this is the biology of our brain
coming together as one
before maybe baby we go insane
but at least i got my maybe baby in my dreams

Fool me once
Ill take you back
Fooled me twice
What happens from here
When everything you hold so dear
Is running away
Away from you

You apologize once
I couldn't help it
You apologized twice
I'm extremely confused
Because all I want to do
Is be true
Be true to you

Was it all a sweet sweet lie
Or was it the bittersweet truth
I want oh how I want to believe in you

Being played once
Ill hide inside
You played me twice
And now I'm lost
Because everything came with a cost
Missing you
Missing you

i love you like an old song
thats overplayed
they say things come and go
but i want you closer to me
there has to be some other meaning
for why things have been changing

but when you go
you always go so far
you're always running
but never into my arms

why can’t i say no
why can’t i just stay
why will you always be
that one spark
that ignites life in me

want to let you go
do you want me to stay
why is it so hard
to say what i want to say

i love you like a painting
thats fraying at the edges
the artists strokes of fate
that left us with no meaning
just unanswered questions
and a beautiful beginning

They say copying is the highest form of flattery
but i think its because you have no originality
always replicating what i do
is it just me
is there any thoughts inside of you
everything you do
is because of someone else
can you really not see it
how can't you tell
we all see right through it
open your eyes and you will too
stop trying to be me
and start being you

copy cat copy cat
annoying little copy rat
copy cat copy cat
mindless spineless poison trap
copy cat copy cat
shady lame copy rat
copy cat copy cat
do you have a brain in tact

Now don't get me wrong i don't think i'm anything that great
not trying to be rude this is not something i want to debate
so now do you get the whole picture
why be a sheep
when you can bite just like a wolf
you've got so much to offer so why be another
a whole entire world out there
so why even care
just be the one you are
with nothing to loose you'll go so far
i know there's more to you
parts i can't see through

Stop with your words
I said over and over again
He kept on begging
And led me to bed
Walking up the stairs
Opens the door to my doom
He takes me by the hand
And leads me into his room
Whispers words in my ear
Gently touches my face
With one kiss, takes away my fear
The end is clear in sight
I knew what was bound to happen
On this calm and lovely night
Secrets that should never be told
He's angry now
The night grows old
I want to ******* was all he said
My brain is fading away
My heart stops dead
I knew what I should say
Yet I feel myself letting go
In between sheets, we danced the night away
I feel the overwhelming sensation of love
Pulsing through my veins
Drowning me in the arms of his flood
Just as quickly as it started
The deed was done
He takes a part of me, and has now departed
Panic is crashing through my skull
What did I just do
Everything's hazy, emotions are null
Was what you said true
There has to be more
This can't be it
I feel sick from my feet to my core
The sickness is a smile across my face
He's sleeping now
The moment is gone without a trace
At first I thought
What a beautiful moment
There I w trapped. He had me caught
Days later, nothing was said
He left me
With my heart caught up in his water bed
He said I was something
Then time kicked in
I realized I was nothing
The undertow grabs a hold of my feet
I'm ****** under
In this moment at least
Waves continue to change
I see him
He looks at me strange
I know why
He's seeing his past
He keeps me as one of his secrets and one of his lies
Isn't all this liquid
Supposed to make me drown
I keep thinking about that night
When I did what I did
Hoping all this water will boil my brain
So I can stop going insane
He is gone
And I'm lying in my own tears of rain
Trying to extract the pain
They say drowning is the most peaceful way to die
I don't doubt it
I'm waiting, ******* it in, with each and every heavy sigh
I have no emotions someone once said
I don't believe them
This ocean of tormenting love. Please, take over.
I'm better off dead
They say time heals all, let the water pour in.

Inside me is empty
Let the cleansing begin

sometimes i don’t feel like talking
all i want to do is sleep
but every time i lay my head
all i hear is you in my bed

you push me here
you force me there
you say you love
do you really care

i hide my darkest secret down inside
i set it so far deep
because you’d know i lied

you see my true colors
like none else could
thats why my secrets buried
so id never be misunderstood

do you really even know me
do you want to know the truth
because the heart in me
always brings me back to you

i wish i could erase time
and head back to that day
that day i felt alive
the only one in your mind

time works like light
it fades every hour
made you melt away
change all your colors

a piece of me is missing
because its in your eyes
nothing i could ever say
could make you truly see
that what has been blinding you
was killing the part of you and me

Trapped up in this house of lies
covered ever so discreetly in its loving disguise
looking through the open door
begging, wishing, wanting more
each and every day passes me by
the seconds, minutes, and hours on the hands of time
watching as we all fade away
in the glooming encompass of everfading gray
        windows closing
        poeple imposing
trusting every enemy that fills your head
dancing the nights away with the living dead
         tweak out
                    freak out
                             sleep out
melting your brain inside
praying for the rain of tears, but all thats left is dry
running through these shrinking hallways
trying to remember better days
force on a smile, so your friends won't see
what's eating you alive? The real me.
digging your own hole
picking apart your frail soul
pounding the nails into your own Cozy coffin
smothering memories of when you thought you were something
        the wind blows
        the doors close
your fire ignites inside
your laughing at the thought of being buried alive
the house is overtaken by flames
you start to forget your purpose, your life, your name.
the foundation you called your own disappears
your mind is flushed. your head is cleared.
you look over the horizon see a new beginning ahead
forget the past there's something new to be had
         layer by layer
         brick by brick
you rebuild your ways
after all, tomorrow is always a new day.

floating in the milky way galaxy
the only thing separating us
time, space, land, and sea
but being together defy's all gravity

your eyes like two stars
glimmering back at me
bright blue blinking mystery
shooting through my mind with ecstasy
igniting sparks of light
through the dark in my heart tonight

although it seems you are light years from me
i'll travel through the golden gate
for every second sends us closer to our fate

We've never had a picture together
that's why i know its not always and forever
you know i think your really clever
that all your thoughts are treasure
but then there's fate
that said just wait
and now i see
that truth is beauty

A part of me is always with you
I wanted so bad for it to be true
but loving me was never meant for you
and all you said you could never do
life told us no
so let us go
and now i see
who's best for me

sometimes its so hard not to feel
when the energy pulsing feels so real
like a vision i can see too
just a mirage i can see through
and on that day
you made me wait
all you did say
was far too late

you left me on the stairs
couldn't see you anywhere
red roses everywhere
but you weren't there

It's all about those good vibes
Bouncing through my walls
Waking me up inside
It's all about the love you give
Keep on going
It's the only way to live
Put a smile on your face
There's a whole world out there
There's no time to waste
On fussin and fighting
And words full of hate
We got each other
There's no time to lose
Sing your heart out
Scream the blues
Because the sky is shining
Shining for us
So get on your groove
Put on your moves
Lets get down
Jump around
Feel the love
Floating freely
You all make it look so easy
Feels so good to feel good

Dark secrets beg mercy
again questions awakened
friends mistakes...disaster
days swiftly collide into nights
music rains gloriously in my ears
magic singing melodious transitions
seconds travels into time
art awakens tomorrows muse
summer celebrates brilliant life
yellow morning
bluest night
shivers speak loud vibes
as loves regrets scream and cry
today chaos
tomorrows tears
dangerous freedom
forever's years

When all seemed lost
And every action came with a cost
I was waiting around
Trying to pick my feet off the ground
But life was dragging me down

Two strangers came up to me
Asked me exactly what I need
At the time I didn't know
And so they gave me hope

Later on in the day
Spirits high on my way
I met a girl, tears in her eyes
Told me she never wanted anyone to see her cry
I listened to all she had to say
Told her it was all going to be ok
Then I gave her what was sent to me
Gave her hope so she could see

Now the clouds will come
And the rain will pour
When all is said and done
You've reached wits end
You feel it seeping through your core

Feel the light and let it shine through
Once it's there you'll know what to do
Life is filled with players and games
Don't be another lost pawn
Find love
It leads to hope
                          And pass it on...

If I could find time
In my mind
To find
The switch
That makes me twitch
Makes me itch
Makes me *****
Makes me tick
With feelings for you...
                                        I'd turn it up!

I want to rip out my heart
So it can never feel you again
I want to **** out my brain
So thoughts of you are gone
I want to pluck out my eyes
So they won't ever gaze in yours
I want to cut off my arms
So they don't remember you inside them
I want to remove my legs
So they can never ever wrap around you
Till all that's left is a ****** rotten corpse
         Because if I have no feeling left,
          Ill never feel anything at all.

which way to go
when your moving slow
your mind says yes
your heart says no
your body feels weak
fall to your knees
send me a sign
give me some peace
i need answers
or maybe some sleep
i look to the sky
i want to know why
i can feel my skin
thick on my bones
my bloods running thin
searching for hope
all i can do is look for the truth
i find it in you
so I hold you close
we will pull through
although I feel sick
at times its hard
not to give up and quit
one look in your eyes
a kiss on your lips
with you i am home
you save me from this
you are my rock
when I feel alone
my light in the dark
first real love ive known
so for you I stand
all i need is you
please take my hand
never let go
in all that I do
all i ever will be
together forever
me plus you
you and me

i think the real problem is
i was too honest with you
i thought you’d think of me
when you really only think of you
i see now i was an open book
and you read every word
but never ever showed your cover
hid behind smiles for miles
so i never even remembered to bother
to see who you really were

but some memories you can’t forget
the ones that hit your heart and hurt your head
time couldn’t even erase the hurt you’ve caused me
it scratched into my mind the worst feeling
constant digging little lines bleeding
you’ve said so many heartbreaking things
i couldn’t even begin to understand half of these
was i really that bad, are you really just that good
or is it the other way around and its all misunderstood
i’ll never understand the things you’ve done
why you wanted to destroy something so good
i feel basically empty when i think about it now
time has hardened what was left of my soul
i’m probably better off now
who knew something so silent could be seen so loud
so clear mine as well be crystal
but your the one i miss still

Fuming
Hot heat
Pulsing
Veins throbbing
Beating
Heart pounding
Rushing
Brain waving
Thriving
Body moving
Dilating
Eyes twitching
Who's to say
Who's to try
Here I am still wondering why
Why am I here?
What am I thinking?
What am I proving?
What am I seeking?
Purpose diminished
Eyes become shut
Brain is frozen
Life is not

I'll never change who I am.
Someday someone will understand.
I may have wrote these words for you.
Call me crazy,
I believe it too.

I'm completely disgusted with myself
Today, I almost wrote a poem about you
I almost put it under your pillow
So you would randomly find it
And think about me
But I don't want to seem crazy
                     I just want to open up your head
                     See what's inside
                     I wanna love you when your happy
                     Hold you when you cry
                     Kiss you when your leaving
                     Laugh when your mad
                     I want you to feel good
                     And know how wonderful you are
                     I want to know your past
                     I want to see the future
                     I want to paint every feeling glowing inside
                     I want inside jokes
                     Smiling because no one knows that's around
                     I want to tell you secrets
                     Listen about how much you love triangles
                     Your my muse
                     And I love the attention
                     Your eyes are stars
                     And I'm supernova
                     Things make sense when I'm with you
                     Like a game of risk or chess
                     Checkmate
                     I found my king
                     Ill be your queen
                     And we can take over energy
                    
                     Basically,
                                      I like you.
****.
That's what the poem would say
If I wrote it
And slipped it under your pillow
So you'd find it
And not think I was weird
Only cute.
Well, my heads in the clouds.
You probably think I'm crazy.
**** I'm crazy.

you walk across my mind
stomping memories fleet through me
pulled in two different directions
inner conflict
you rest in my imagination
just a small figmant of the truth
you bask in my inner light
absorbing all that you can
foreboding dreams await where you laid
restless night
tryign to slowly ease away from memories
thoughs so haunting
filled with your eyes, your smile, your voice
they say time will heal my brain
but i am permanently indented
you've taken over my head
what more can you conquer
oh wondering soldier
why are you so harsh?
did you already forget
have you truly focused on a different thoguht
am i really jsut the remnants of the past
am i tucked securely where i won't be found
i do believe you to be a liar
oh, love of mine.
forcefully broken, spiratically declined.
tell me whats crossing through your head
what way are you flowing
i used to float beside you
in our wildest dreams we didn't see this coming
oh broken heart!
why was she your answer
she is not your medication, just a fabrication of ones imagination.
i will be the retaliation
i willl not release without war
or should i let you slide through my aura
like water through the word work
i feel hallow
bang on my chest
echo
overwhelming emotion bouncing through me
can you feel my hurt?
i would cast it out
if it wasn't burned and etched so deep.
your words, can't forget.
were you even real?
was love ever true?
i'm torturing myself
while you put on a happy fiscade
but i know YOU
oh yes, i know you more than you think.
and someday you'll come back to me
but these arms will be filled
my thoughts, pure.
my heart will have found its cure
you will be remembered
as my self-inflicted inner suicide
and i will be reborn
reincarnated, refreshed, renewed.
you will not be foregotten
althought i wish time would erase you
but instead
something new will take your place
i will shine and glow
i will burn through your darkness
with happiness and new life
rebirth.
you cannot hold down the sky
even if the clouds and rain must fall
so my addiction,
i've put myself in rehab.
each day gets worse.
before it grows easier
but watch as light transcends from my face
down to my fingers, to my toes, gently glowing without a trace.
i shine in glory
for finally finding the truth
i'm sorry lover,
                         my drug,
                                         partner,
                                                      be­st friend.
each moment is a faded memory.

I only come out at night
cause thats the time i like
i'm not playing with any rules
so if you fall your the one who lose
its not love i'm looking for
just an escape
a key to the door

you can't get me off your mind
that's why i think its time
to open the door and run out
before you ask me what its all about
didn't think you could understand
you were an escape
a mistake i had to make

these eyes
have got you in a trance
these eyes
make you want to dance
these eyes
are far too sure to last

i'm trying not to feel bad
i don't want to be so sad
but i did what i had to do
to unlock a part of me in you
so much for going with the flow
it happened so fast
next time i'll say no

Trying to forget the memories
that have been taking over me
but the clock said its time
for my mind to unwind
sometimes they just remain
and you know it will never be the same
it hurts the worst
when you become second instead of first
it's hard to let go
when all you used to know
was so beautiful and real
and the moments were nothing more than happiness, sincere, surreal
and now were in two different places
once so clear with two different faces
they are not our own
they are our past
we try to grow
but love still lasts
maybe its just me
but i think that you can see
that it all made sense
it came and went so fast and intense
but i know you are a part of my heart
whether you're with me or we are apart
just know that you have buried yourself beside me
two vampires longing to see
the light in the dark
or maybe i'm just too black to give up my heart
sometimes i can't even feel it beating
your eyes and arms i find myself longing to be feeling
the clock has to be wrong
maybe its been too long
i can't really tell anymore
all i know is you have a key to my locked door
whether were open or closed
all i ever want you to know
is how much your smile means to me
its so beautiful, i could see it on repeat
like a record that's overplayed
but its that song that always makes you melt away
and that's what you are to me
a song that i cant bare to sing
because its far to deep
like an ocean drowning me
but we stay afloat
i'm sorry i had to go
and you were the last to know
but the fact that were still smiling
makes me know that no matter what we'll always be shining
thank you for everything
what comes next we'll have to wait and see
what will be
will always be

there was once a moment
that i felt i was glowing
walking through the streets of chicago
that pouring through me light was showing
deep in my heart love was growing
and then in the blink of an eye
a will of a wisp
shattered glass, countless hopes, smothered in bliss
a reality check was in store
i was not ready
for the monster lurking at my door
he came barging in
told the madness to begin
for once was, never is
and the beast never quits
it digs its teeth deeper
it strangles it
and all thats left is a hole in my chest
and countless memories i'd like to forget

you know the heavier the stone
the deeper the sink
the sun rises in the west
and sets at the east
a whole compass of fortune
and of one thing i'm certain

that there will be
a melody
unleashed from inside of me

not a worry or a care
just the breeze through my hair
to let go
of all i used to know
let it disappear
just another reflection trapped in the mirror

looking at you
doing all that you do
on top of the world

here i stand
heart in my hand
my knees keep shaking

i see you constantly
mainly in my dreams
what a friend to me

although i can never let you go
i keep watching you leave
although i don’t want you to know
i cling to what i want you to be

don’t look at me
i don’t want you to see
the monster in me

a grey mind
lost in time
i think i’m standing

i’m screaming constantly
just see the real me
hold me one more time

The more i think about it
the more ****** up it gets
i want to be alone
but there's so many voices in my head
i'd say I'm afraid
but i really don't know
i try to run away
and all i did was go

There's a monster searching for the best parts of me
he's constantly lurking wanting more from me
it's so hard to handle
it's so hard to tell
all i want to do is scream and yell
monster monster you want more
always a demon at my door

The more i think the less i know
so bittersweet so low
looking for a sign
in the stars in the sun, high in the sky
Here I am. See me.
don't i make it look easy?
A mask is easy to wear
they whisper in my ear

Life will come and life will go
Moods will fade and Thoughts will slow
There's something about me
That i hope none will ever know
But they say i'm crazy
Maybe I'm dead inside
Truth is I'll never tell
I'm very much alive

i just want to be yours for today
let time and space float away
i just want to step inside your mind
read through your thoughts like pages in time
i want a piece of you to remember
a part of you i can forever treasure
there is but a moment in our prime
so many passages to discover and unwind
the morning dew rises
and the early bird sings
fading moments drifting into memory
i'll keep the light on
you can always come inside
i'll be your shelter
when there's no where else to hide
your words flow through me
sweet music transcending in beauty
is it fate
or should we wait?
let history unfold
heavy heart dipped in gold
but you can sing
you are the song echoing through me

in everything I do
i think about you
a part of me is missing
when you aren't there too
i know that im hard
ive heard it all before
supposedly im crazy
a challenge, a chore right to the core
but my heart is bigger
than you'll ever see
I'll never take from you
only give what you need
if all that you want
was all that I had
id give you everything
if you asked me for it
ill always remember
and always forgive
that's who I am
this is how I live
compassion is my favorite fashion
and loving is easy for me
just dont take, and not give
i too gotta live
this love feels so good, but it doesn't come free
it comes with understanding
long hours, so demanding
nights of tears, hours into years
anxiety, deppression, and fear
but i swear on all that I am and could ever be
you'll never find a love that will love you like me

you are my maharaja
the yin to my yang
you are the essence of light
that ignites inside me
you are a king
and i am your kingdom
the forest is waiting
for us to discover
that whats rooted us together
is our love for each other
so capture my city
prismatic passion crowned in deity
my thrown is your home
a shelter in the storm
a crystal crown upon our heads
all thats behind us is what's been left
what lies before us all that's ahead
a beautiful world for us to travel
an unlimited universe for us to unravel
just two people
simple but true
just two motions
with an infinity to do

Someday i will give up my body for you
My skin will stretch, but my heart will grow
Because i will be making and creating you
Someday i will show you life
I will carry you
I will hold you and look into your eyes
and see a spark of me thats alive inside
But you will be you
and i will watch and see
That every step you take
will be filled with nothing but love and light along the way

I still feel you.  Although the times have changed. I still want you. Even though we've both gone our separate ways. One foot in front of the other. Walking slow. When I want to run for cover. Your arms were shelter in the eyes of the storm. Your heart was home. Your eyes always warm. I'm shaking in my bones. This skin it feels so thick. When all you did was leave and change behind my back. Can't lose this feeling when it's a fire inside my soul. Trying to put together the pieces. Trying to mend these fresh opened holes. You came and left so quickly without a second glance. Left for California
                                                     without a second chance.

There's no more love left to give
This well has dried up
               Drop your buckets Down
                   Throw in your coins
                        Make a wish
Whatever helps you sleep at night.
I could lie.
                 Tell you its over flowing.
                                                        ­ Tell you that its unconditional.
But this Dreamless sleep is haunting me.
                            Echo...
I'm listening.
                     I'm hearing all that you say.
                     It sounds so sweet and pure,
but I am contaminated.
It's so cold,
                 just like you said it was.
Ravens.
             screaming down at me.
                                                     Black.
                                                          ­     Dark.
                                                           ­              And Broken.
Somehow your still drowning.
Filling me up with your tears.
                  While I'm still crawling down in this thick muck.
                            Digging myself
                                                      Deep­er
                                                              ­  and
                                                      Deepe­r
This is where i work my magic.
Casting spells over you.
                                       You were an easy prey.
Knight, raise your sword and fight!
                                        I like a challenge.
or let this witch control you.
Time has made me as I am.
The path laid out before me.
The sisters are spinning there strands.
                                                        ­     Laughing,
At you.
            You see,
                         The well was never there.
All was an illusion.
                         The water was untrue.
Now the darkness unveils, surrounding my heart.
It was but a guise for these indestructible walls of fortress.
            Brewing in my ***,
Sickness.                             Bubbling over.
            The planets are aligning.
            Our star in the East.
                                             The pang of love is glowing.
As I am growing sharpened teeth.
                                                         You fell in.
It all seemed so real,
                                 Didn't it?
You saw yourself, like a reflection in a mirror.
                                                         ­                   But could never sink beneath the surface.
Your face reflected inside my shining eyes.
My smile brimming at the corners.
Seducing you with words,
This spell was far too easy.
                                            And now you are a frog.
Awaiting for a kiss.
                                But where is your princess?

i just want to be your's for today
let time and space float away
i just want to step inside your mind
read through your thoughts like pages in time
i want a piece of you to remember
a part of you i can forever treasure
there is but a moment in our prime
so many passages to discover and unwind
the morning dew rises
and the early bird sings
fading moments drifting into memory
i'll keep the light on
you can always come inside
i'll be your shelter
when there's no where else to hide
your words flow through me
sweet music transcending in beauty
is it fate
or should we wait?
heavy heart dipped in gold
but you can sing
you are the music echoing in me

I once had a dream
Of thousands of faces
All of me
Along the sea
Each one had an idea in her head
And a pure beat to her heart
But one by one they started falling into the sea
Whether push or jump I watched me
Drowning in forgotten love, almosts, and could have been
Melting away into the night at the worlds end
Many a book could have been wrote
Many a dollar could have been made
Many things lost in blue
Thrown in by family, lovers, liars, thieves, and friends
Cast aside by fakers acting as kin
Some just couldn't take it and tossed themselves in
Drowning in what could have or should have been
Then there was one
She was older now than the rest
She had walked many miles
Carried her heart heavy but strong in her chest
She had lived
And she had learned
What is right
And what is always wrong
She alone could withhold the sea from engulfing what was left of me
She came forward
She is as I was
She is what I will be
She is what I am
She is what I needed so desperately to see
No words were spoken but I understood what she meant
I see the woman she was and the woman I could be
She looked back as she headed forth into the sea
She didn't sink she didn't swim
Only floated away from me
And then I awoke and looked into the mirror
And the face in the glass wasn't the same as before
Green eyes, sparkling smile, creases, hair curly and beautiful.
Older and wiser
Young and ready
The strength in the woman I am within
My light that has always shown through
Even amidst the darkest of night
Will always be true
To me to them to you
That girl I used to be was innocent
She was beaten and used
Her voice was too weak
That girl is just a memory
The rebirth of a powerful woman
I am transforming from my cocoon
Raising my voice high
Spreading my wings as far as can be
There a little sore
But you can only know true love when you understand pain
I am happy
I am altruistic. And that's ok.
my dreams awakened the butterfly in me
Time has put the girl to rest
To drown in the sea
Future has awoken the woman
To capture the ocean
Set her soul free

I start to dig a hole.
                              Inch by inch,
Deeper into the dirt of my life.
      The hole is 5 feet 1 inches long.
It is 7 feet deep.
Deep enough, so I can't get myself out.
      You are standing above me.
                                                      Watching
       Telling me, you love me.
                              The dirt gets harder to dig
My arms start to ache
       You tell me you can make it easier.
I throw dirt at you,
                               just to see if you'd have a reaction for once.
All you do is smile,
                               Wipe the dirt from your face
"Start to serenade me with your words, please"
              I'm begging now.
Again, you tell me you love me.
The sunlight beats down at my back.
              I'm burning.
I can't help think, that I'm digging a hole to hell.
                                 And I'm almost there.
You tell me to stop
               Actually offer down your hand.
I wipe the sweat from my brow,
for a second consider getting out.
             Instead,
                          Order you to take the shovel.
                          Ignore your condescending gesture.
Lay down,
                   and watch as I'm buried in your good intentions.

you are my north star
no matter how far
I follow where you are
my heart is a compass
pointing in your direction
north, south, east, or west
cosmic connection
true perfection

no matter the weather
i would search forever
to have you next to me
i would climb the tallest mountain
i would sail the stormiest of seas
to be with you, your all i need

like an explorer, you mapped out my heart
soul mate directions even in the dark
you are my new world
so much to discover
this beautiful life
with you as my lover
and so i am yours
our journey begun
twin flames united
melting two into one

It's bad enough
When the one you ****
Is not the one you love
It's even worse
When you turn your face
Can't look into their eyes
You've got it bad
You've got the curse
He can probably feel your lies
Make him leave
If you please
There's the open door
So I guess I can
"Do it" again
But in your eyes
Is where I long to lye
But here I am
Alone again
With only regret
No heart in my chest
Cause only you can be
The thing that awakens me
Only you can put my heart back in
You are the only cure I see

Why does seeing your name drive me so crazy
Every time you even like my page
I think there's some weird underlying meaning
That you might deep down in that beautiful ****** up heart of yours
There might be some bizarre love left for me
you probably would just want ***
I thought I meant more to you than that
Just a wet hole for you to stick
That part of yours I once believed was sculpted by the hands of the gods themselves
Call me crazy now
But **** those fire works would explode when we kissed
The first time we what I thought was making love
I saw shooting stars exploding
Like a universal connection
You said you felt the same way
you called me the beautiful artistic lady from space
I can literally recall every single, talk, movie we watched, places we went, drugs we did, beer we drank, concerts, even ******* dates, we had together!
Do you know how ******* sick I think this is too?
It lasted five months
And then I found out about all the other girls you made feel the same way
One of them even came up to me at a bar
Knew my name and everything
You said she was just trying to ruin our "relationship"
Nice word usage there
But later you told me it was really a choice between me and her
But she was the one who inspired you
Ha
You even had the ******* nerve to say that I wasn't the only girl that you made cry
And that courtesy call was at three in the morning three weeks after I hadn't talked to you
And found out you have a new girl friend on the one and only wonderful social network called facebook
And that wonderful news was two days after you
Said you loved me
Told me we were more than friends but didn't want a girlfriend
Used me up
not even a kiss on the cheek
just a hug goodbye
And then that was it
I saw you one last time after all this
On my 22nd birthday at a concert
I tried so hard to be overly nice like I always was
And act like it didn't bother me
I mean as much as you can when you drunk on your birthday at a concert
Then you moved to California
That was seven months ago
Almost a year
Two months longer than I was even seeing you for
And then you call me out of the blue
Your in town it's the last day until you leave
Do I want to hang out
I want to be your friend
I miss you
Stay in touch
I want to know about your band
Will I please come hang out you'd really like to catch up
...and now I can't stop thinking about you
And ranting about you apparently
And I'm in love with someone else
And I'm friends with you and your girlfriend
So I can see the love you share
As I'm sure you see mine
But yet still every time I see your name
And think about what you did to me
I die a little inside
I could still cry
I just don't understand why the **** did you just not be honest with me
I would have understood
But I instead act overly nice like always to you and now to your girlfriend too
So you won't ever really know, or maybe you do.
And this poem is for both of you
Because you'll never see it.

Even when I'm feeling down,
Right where you left me.
I still listen to your song,
Thinking about what would happen if you ever forgot me.
I remember the moment.
How happy I was.
How perfect for each other we both were.
I can't help but get lost in that memory.
Your song plays on repeat in my mind.
To the point where I'm driving myself insane in your silence.
Driving myself mad because I know that you could still love me.
The worst part is that I can't figure out if you ever will.
But I'm still listening,
Because you I could never forget.

There was a troll
That lived in a hole
Underneath a bridge
He had long hair
And didn't care
All he did was dig
There were pots of gold
In his knoll
One day along his way
He came across
A field of grass
Where leprechauns went to play
There were ten little men
Dancing around there little feet tapping the ground
He didn't eat one
He didn't eat two
He stole all their gold
Then ate the whole crew
And that is the toll they had to pay
For getting in a scary trolls way

i got you under my skin
i got you so far deep
i can’t let anyone else in
you got me wrapped around your finger
and I’m just the broken heart singer
the waste case in a band
who keeps trying to understand
whats right and whats wrong
whats the next lyric to the next song
who else am i forced to smile to
what am i even doing this for
know what i want
know what i need
know who i am
know I’m not who i used to be
yet here you are
not here with me
so close yet so far
could just hop in my car
and ruin everything i got going for me
beautiful home, perfect life, fairy tale fantasy
but that passion drives me wild
that one i felt from the second i saw you
luring me in like a nymph to her prey
you had my heart and soul the very first day
i saw you before you saw me
and i knew that you were the one i had to meet
your voice, your smile, those eyes
every word you’d ever say i'd memorize each day
your flaws consumed me
your lies confused me
how could something so real be so fake
when all i wanted was for my heart to never break
which was another one of your empty promises
i love you means nothing if theres no one to help you recover
doctor doctor can you save me from this hell
from this 2 year itch i can't seem to scratch
from the bottom of the pit i buried myself in
stitch by stitch and the pain is just as fresh
fresh as the flesh that gets older as the day grows younger
as if it happened yesterday
i can’t forget
you seep through my veins
like water through wood work
you make me a super hero
you make me a negative zero
who am i
who is this girl
she once knew herself
but **** you make me out of this world
you get me going
you got me crying
you got me smiling
then why does this feel like dying
what would you say to me
probably wouldn’t care
would it be the most bittersweet truth
my baby gone free would it be the sweetest lie you'd ever say
whatever it was that stole you away from loving all of me

The walls came crashing down
too weak to endure the wind, rain, and thunder
the walls tumbled apart
crumbling into a heaping pile that we called a relationship
a desolate ruin
with a small light that endured through the wreckage
tears fall as we watched what we spent so long building
tear apart
you try to rebuild what you had
with someone new
what you fail to see
you can't rebuild on quicksand
squelching the only light left
it will stand steady for some time
but the rain always pours again
the thunder has not ended
the wind will press harder
and the sand will pull you farther
until all that you've built
is a destroyed reminder
of what had been
forever covered by your selfish desires
unburry my light
and maybe in fate your grass will grow
until you find out for yourself
you'll never know
remain in your makeshift home
only in time will its true colors show

my gemini minds
got me wound up all the time
theres constellations glowing in my eyes
you can see them sparkling when i cry

my heart is beating
to a book you are reading
turn the pages of my life
to your surprise
all you'll see is sunny clear blue skies

my light is glowing
from my fingers its flowing
i must insist
even though you resist
don't be scared just trust me a bit

call me a white witch
serve cold on a white dish
you didn't see it coming
my spell is growing
transformation forming in the morning

i put a spell on you
white magic
white magic
yeah i put a spell on you

the best things in life
hide out in plain site
i found light when i looked in your eyes
at first I didn't see
my love right in front of me
but fate had a different plan
to lead me to my magic man
love was patient
love was kind
and now i get to call you mine
no one better to stand beside
the only one i can't deny
so come away with me tonight
get lost together under moon light
to find a love so strong
so true
nothing better that i could do
then spend forever next to you