Your hands were your first language
and all formalities and expectations aside
I want you to whisper into my skin
spell words into my flesh
just like I spelled my name over and over
inside my chest when I first learned
how to make letters out of my fingers
at summer camp in 5th grade
last night you reminded me of that week
more than I'll ever tell you
you are running through thick forrest
you are sunlight through the trees
you are blue skies
and you are also thunderstorms
I have seen both in your eyes
don't ever be afraid to rain
I wanted to tell you
Both storms were on a Wednesday night
the water never touched me either time
yet seemed to soak my soul
arms around my knees
whispered words
I think you were too upset to notice
that you reverted back to the voice that projects from your fingers
sometimes I forget English is your second language
you speak it so eloquently
hands
around your face
as if speaking in perfect verse
fluttering

"what are you saying"

fluttering

"you're so pretty"
"you're so pretty"
"you're so pretty"
you whispered

"pretty"
"pretty"
"pretty"
I repeated
using nothing
but my hands

Sometimes ***** tastes like you.
Like having *** on the bathroom counter.
Like pizza movie nights.
Like getting high on the roof while reading poetry.
Like eating you out in the back of that church.
Like crashing that car in the field behind your house.
Like playing the guitar on your back porch.
Like the sound your horrid contagious laughter.
Like drawing hearts on each other's backs with crayola markers.
Like your tongue after the first cigarette.
Like you and me.
Like you.
Like us.
Like you.

On shadows yonder, that is what you fear against, that rain he is wondering, spilling over like dreams. To cry when the words have begun, to turn to my desires, just seven wonderous seconds. A trapdoor you were falling through drifts across the sea. How to shake my nerves when he must dance for them, how to paint after the ending? He burns the sky with his blood. Soft endearments surround the ideal. Even if you can’t speak the rhythm, we are just a part of time. I keep this treasure to build my dreams. I fly this soul to carry you.

I am four foot ten
"But you are still growing"
But I have to question if
I really want to
(Growing up is hard)

I've made stupid mistakes
"Your brain is still growing"
Maybe I like my dumb bravado
Please don't make me face off
the truth of reality

What about my heart?
"You are much too young
to know what love is"
But I'm old enough
to know my heart beat
(and who it beats for)

Physically I am
seventeen
Mentally I feel
thirty-three
So explain to me
what is age?
(The concept of age
is just a number)

If I must grow old
can I keep you by my side?
I hope you don't mind
my short height
(and my stupid bravado)

Will you grow with me?
I'm too young too know
how long we will last
But I'm old enough to know
That my young heart want you now

(and my old heart wants you forever)

In school they showed us a video
about drug cartels and drug addition,
but all I could think about was you,
and how much I crave your touch.

The mouth of the presenter is moving,
but his words fall on deaf ears
that crave the sound of your voice.

As I think about your lips,
and how they taste,
I can't help but wonder if this is addiction,
because all of my desire is revolved around you.
(Constantly wanting you by my side)
(Constantly, constantly craving you)

I've never injected a needle,
or taken a hit.
Come to think of it,
those drug dealers have no idea how intense I feel,
so they can keep their substances.
Why would I need that
when I already have you?
(The substance of love is powerful)
(in the form of you)

Please don't let me fall in love with you.
I want to be happy, just the way I am.
I am only going to hurt myself on your
rough and unforgiving edges of ignorance.
Maybe I'm going to drown in the water
when the thin sheet of ice that
I'm stumbling on breaks.

You won't complete me,
As I need to complete myself.
Don't complicate my life,
making your existence easier.
Let me know when you're ready to love.
Love for me comes easy,
And backfires ripping my heart to pieces.

Complete the unsolved puzzle
And let my love flow in your veins.

If my fear
is an illusion,
so is my
hope.