I only see you in my class
Constantly focusing on your school work
While I keep getting lost looking at you
Trying to figure out what I'm gonna say when I finally
Finally swallow my pride and...
But I can't
Not cause I don't think I can san what I want to say
But cause my mind freezes up around you
I start to talk fast and can't keep up with what words I say so I start to mumble and lose track of what I was originally saying and everything comes together like one long sentence that seems to never end for days
You don't even know me
And I barely know you myself
But I just want to get to know you more
I want you to learn the inside of my mind
So you can understand why I'm the way I am around you

See, I can barely contain this hopeless romantic inside of me
Who's trying to maintain the constant pain gained from the past
That never lasts but seems to cast a dark shadow around me
Only to be overcast by the radiant light you give off
Being in your mere prescence creates a situational hazard
I just can't avoid
Or I choose to meet head on with my inner Self
Creating conflict concerning whether or not
I should even say one word to you
Knowing one of two results will unfold
Either you choose to avoid me and this possible story ends
Or you become interested in where this story is heading
Honestly, I'm hoping for the latter
Cause I want to progress this little narrative
From chapter one of meeting you
To chapter two of getting to know you
Then to chapter three
Where I admit my feelings towards you
If only that were possible
But the truth of the matter is
I would only have so long to really create such a story
And even if we were to make it so far
We wouldn't know if our respective goals would
Take us down the same path
Or lead to a fork where we're forced to
Split for an unknown period of time and
Test out whether we could outlast time
As if we were doing time for a crime of loving one another
And sacrificing on a dime for the sublime feeling of love and trust

I'll write until it hurts.
I'll write until I'm weak.
Writing is the loudest I speak.
Volumes of my glass
as I down each drink,
and choose a tone, a comma,
that will make you think.
And think again.

I don't remember
how to play pretend.

Drunk on guilt and
drunk on whiskey -
I'm drunk on your hurt
and it might **** me.

So I'll write on
because you need to hear me.
We are this way because
you are
never
near me.

Stop blaming everything,
the answers are simple.
Life's not a breeze,
stop playing naive.
We'll go on this way because
you are
never.

We were forever.

As I sit there on the floor of my shower, Letting the water that's pouring over me turn from hot to chilling cold, I hope the water can hide my tears. I hope it will wash away the faint pink lines that cover my arm. But most of all I hope the hours spent curled up, there, on the shower floor will wash away the pain.
I don't mind seeing those faint pink lines across my arm every so often, They help to remind me of all the battles I've fought, Though they are the remnants of the battles that I lost. Those battles have shaped me physically and emotionally. But those battles brought along struggle, Struggles that people who aren't facing them don't understand, Impossible to explain to someone who hasn't been through it all already, Struggles that bring along pain worse than any physical pain imaginable.
That is the pain I wish to be cleansed of.

sun browned skin
wild haired girl
barefoot running
ducking  touching collecting watching
alone
laughing dreaming

dreaming

barefoot green eyed
wild girl
chasing

*chasing what?