Regrets... Mmm yea I got some.
Sense were talking about them do you mind if I told you some?

I regret for leaving,
I regret for staying there..
I regret for leaving mommy,
I regret for staying with you bobby.
I regret for the distance,
I regret for being to close.
I regret for going outside in the cold just to shoot bball that night when my whole family went to go watch a movie.
I regret for putting you up so far that when you hurt me it crumbled the years between us.
I regret for kissing him,
I regret for kidding her.
Now my demons throw rocks at me no matter what the size is.
I regret for not listening,
I regret for well...listening.
Being hard head in both places
Selfishness and offended is the worst when it comes to hearing.

But one thing I don't regret is everyone of them being in my life .. I love you.

I miss their cold house
I miss sittinn w/ them on their couch.
I remember that one time we had to **** a mouse

I miss their smiling faces
even though their was alcohol traces
the talk of their adoption cases

the big giant hugs
the evenly stained rugs
and the spray for the nasty bugs

the personalized birthday cakes
them being there when I wake
those art projects we used to make

their faces when I walked in the door
when we all pitched in to clean the floor
my dad would always snore

the long messages they left on my phone
how I could never ever find a comb
they way we all sang off-tone

I miss when we prayed before diner
we were really all just beginners
all these things I can't help but remeber

prayers in the evening night
the occasional sibling fight
my dad was always right

I love them so much
our story is truly touching
so inspiring and such

even though things got really rough
there is no deny that we were really tough
I didn't get to see long enough

I'm longing for the day
that I can finally say
we are all here to stay.

when we danced in the family room
and in the sring when the flowers bloomed
to the nights where we sat outside and saw the moon

in the summer when we swam at the pool
in the afternoons when they came home from school
to the days it started to get cool

I miss the crazy hair doos
all the days that had been rued
when everyone was in a good mood

when katie wore he skirts too short
and I watched them play basketball on the bball courts
when elizabeth would laugh and then snort:)

when we had that huge waterfight in the backyard
when we would throw pillows at each other really hard
the way we always made each other birthday cards

how we all had to squeeze in our car
the way they liked pickles from a jar
that big brownie that kinda looked like tar

the hello kitty cd player
the giant peppper shaker
and the pro food maker

I miss them with all my heart
it was all ment to be from the start
all of us did our parts.

I miss them

I’m such a troubled soul.
It’s 5:03 in the morning and I can’t shut down.
I literally cannot sleep.
Maybe somebody is dreaming of me?
Wish that ****** would wake up…
I’m wearing white bball shorts and a black expess zip…hood up
Annnnnd……camo crocs haha. I’m a joke.
I’m smoking a djarum black…
The smoke keeps getting in my eyes.
The district sleeps alone tonight is playing on my headphones.
My ex and me broke up 3 years ago..
I have dreams about her every night recently.
In my dreams we’re happy.
So when I wake up it feels like we just broke up and I cry….

local, walking local
basketball in the park
Black family reunion
Missing my friend Mark

gratitude for work
X2 once again
New exomoons
San Francisco Zen

But local now for me
Mostly quiet little town
The Cremation of Sam McGee
Bball, Bobby Brown

Philology
Yes, I believe it so
One man in the forest
One man in Reno snow

               37 below

It doesn't end in exaltation
Hospitals and jail
****** little motel room
Howling inner wail

I rewatch Michael Clayton
Remember you, Roxanne
Rainy Night in Georgia
Stick it to the Man!

My boring little life
But bball with my son
Twilight taxi nights
Comin' home from 101

        un pequito fun

Aurelio and bball into the night
Tolkien. Dragons. Buddhism. Rome.
Fare thee well! I walk home alone.

it just rolls on without me
the thought that scared me so much

inconsequential but
Chris Mullin had a shooter's touch

i have quiet at night
bball in the day

St. John's had Michael Clayton
My t-shirt too did say

Her smile
if only it could stay

Protection from the worst
In myself and others
Even at this late date
Boston. Bball. Brothers.

One brief life
3 young sons
7 Spanish Angels
Give up your guns

Deer appear today
Beauty in the grass
St. James Cathedral
Seattle contemplative Mass

               Snowfall Shunyata
           She was a grand wee lass ...

Utopia and St. Thomas More
Past returns a little like before
     Just now 37 bball score

                    
                Arigato galore!

basketball again today
speaking with the coach

trying to let the worries free
and quietly approach

meaninglessness meanders on
but still the shining sun

another game again tonight
sanuk di! bball's fun!