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laurie Aug 2015
When you have no money nobody wants to know,
Being made redundant, my morale is feeling low.

Waiting on the government to process my claim,
Can't pay my bills, I'm panicking, but I am not to blame.

Creditors chasing me, letters piling up behind the door, powerless to do a thing, but this I can't ignore.

Loosing the will slowly, my head hurts from all the pleading, my children and my dog they will soon need feeding.

No support available, this walk I must do alone, crying myself to sleep, I could have been prepared if I had known.

My world has suddenly collapsed, the domino effect has begun, rippling through my cash flow, this summer isn't feeling fun.

The days are feeling empty, to broke to go anywhere, trying to scrape together copper so I can treat my children to the fair.

Relentless job searches, I'm tearing at my hair, when you are left without a penny and there's no one around to care.

Holding my head in my hands, trying to keep things together, depressed and down I hope this isn't forever.

Fighting off the feelings, trying not to take it to heart, hurt that I worked so hard, from the very start.

I was always there, worked overtime for free, helped out when things were bad, stupid, silly me.

Its ok for the big boys, their wage it tripled mine,
They may be in the same boat, but they will just be fine.

Pacing the walls I'm slowly slipping into madness,
Clinging onto hope, getting lost deep inside the sadness.

A temporary glitch, I'm hoping I will be able to recover, its times like this we need help from one another.

Scared, more terrified but what's worse is I feel alone, trying hard to keep upbeat, trying to remain in good tone.  

My children too young to understand, and my dog just looks at me funny. Not realising the world is dominated by that paper stuff called money.

My thoughts are racing vividly, trying to capture an idea, paralysed by the sudden shock along with intense fear.

My world has collided, my heart begins to fade,
All of this could have been prevented, If only I'd been paid.
laurie Aug 2015
Boarded onto the boats by the hundred's, desperate to flea their own land, leaving with only essentials, families firmly holding hands.

Desperate to escape from the cruel environment they face, loosing everything they are feeling in disgrace.

Another tragic ending the story published worldwide, there's no refuge for our brothers, no where for them to hide.

I often wonder if we deserve the world we were given, so many are suffering in the life that they are living.

Unimaginable circumstances, men, women and children too, there's got to be a way, surely there's something we can do.

Boarded on to the boats by the hundred's, their fate is still unclear, the horrific journey begins, they are overcome by the fear.
laurie Mar 2015
Reaching out to her father but he doesn't want to know, the pain behind her eyes you can see she's feeling low.

Reaching out for answers its been almost thirty years, left empty inside wondering why he never cares.

Reaching out for love from her father in which she has craven, trying to settle the storm within to create her own inner sweet haven.

Reaching out to his stepdaughter over social media, after years of engine searches from google to wikipedia.

Reaching out for a chance to meet the dad who got scared and closed the door, another slap in the face from her big brown eyes the tears they pour.

Reaching out for closure to understand what she did that was wrong, the need to seem him daily is forever growing strong

Reaching out for his explanation he can't even give her that, not even in a letter or face to face in chat.

Reaching out in hope that somehow, someday just maybe, he'll fall in love with her again just like when she was a baby.

Reaching out for his affection she's missed out on having her dad, all the father daughter things, something she has never had.

Reaching out in desperation it hurts her deep and raw, something that has never healed it hurts right through to the core.

Reaching out to her daddy she's not mad or full of hate, she won't accept that this was written as part of her own fate.
laurie Feb 2015
I see the pain in your eyes, the sadness in your reflection, I should have loved you a little more, I should have saved you from rejection.

I see the hurt in your emotion, your longing for my heart, but day by day I'm pushing us further apart.

I'm numb to any feeling, of emotions like love, set me free, if only, I want to fly far and above.

So don't think I don't care, my love for you is pure, only the expression that is faulty it's something I'm trying to cure.

I see the troubles I have caused you, I'll admit that I've done wrong, lets build bridges together and make our love binding  strong.

I see now I never showed you any affection inside, too frightened I ran from you, to protect my feelings I would hide.

I see your efforts to wow me, worship me holey, all alone in your trying you've been doing this solely.  

I've never learnt how to love, always feeling ice cold, warm me up with your passion I don't want to be like this when I'm old.

I see how my actions have caused your loving heart to crumble, I'm sorry for your sorrow, I'll try and catch you from the stumble.

I see if I don't wake up or defrost my frozen heart, I'm going to miss out on my one true love and I know you'll want to part.

So take these words as my token, on paper I hope that it make's sense, please understand I've never felt love these feelings are intense.

Something which I'm still learning, each and everyday, I hope and pray this poem will be enough to make you stay.
laurie Feb 2015
Make me understand, make me see your way, I never get your point of view or the things that you say.

Make me see your vision, make me catch your drift, all of this quarreling is making us adrift.

Make me see what's real, since you say my ways are crazy, to me they are the truth but you insist that they are hazy.  

Make me get the point, I don't always understand, this conflict is confusing it's something I can't stand.

Make me feel ok about the person inside of me, I am not blind, I just don't see the things you see.
laurie Feb 2015
Always riding the tide, never quite reaching the shore, searching deeply for something, this I cant ignore.

Always hoping and waiting, to feel the change in the water, longing to feel the calm now I'm no longer your daughter.

Always pondering thoughts, collectively stored upon my mind, not to certain either on what I'm trying to find.

Always wanting more, never feeling content or at ease, trying to keep the balance, always aiming to please.

Always riding the tide, never quite reaching the shore, not wanting to feel, feel this way anymore.
laurie Dec 2014
I am nieve to believe your sickening excuse,
But for our son remain to keep the peace, I called upon a truce.

It's not fair that you dare, you act like you don't care.

I am stupid for understanding,
It's not like I'm a ***** or even ridiculously demanding.

He's your son, he should be your saviour
I'm shocked by your ways and selfish behaviour.  

I am a fool to let you rule this situation isn't cool.

A distant father but your not that far away,
Never interested in his schooling or parent teacher day.

I am fed up of hearing your always hard done by, yet you can afford to party don't you think that's just sly?

You go on like we live in outer space,
You never call or ask about him, to your own disgrace.

I am sick I've had this for nine years,
Our boy he thinks that nobody cares.

Two days out of fourteen you parent our son,
more bothered by drink not by the damage that's done.

I am scared our son is being effected,
when you let him down I can see he feels rejected.

You only have one chance to share these moments, strangled by your image and your lifes long torments.  

I am here everyday  by his side,
the pain he is feeling, he cannot hide.

When age catches up and your reminiscing,
I'll be sure to know you'll regret the memories you are missing.

I'm not mad, just sad, our boy needs his dad,
he should never have to feel like he's done something bad.

And when you wake up from the lifestyle you've live, I hope our son is able to forgive.
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