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I’m watching you
In the dark alleyways, where I gaze on as a mugging occurs
And standing on that gloomy, silent street corner, the little red light of my cigarette glowing
And from the roof of the echoing parking garage next to a lone car
And as I rest my back against the cold stone of a crypt in a graveyard
I’m watching you
In the dimly lit, empty café, where I sip a cup of loneliness
And as I dance in the smoky, sweating aliveness of the nightclubs
And as I stare at the waves on the deserted, moonlit boardwalk
I’m watching you
Seated atop the Sphinx of Giza in the freezing Egyptian night
And in the very back row of an empty baseball stadium
And in a prison cell, where a death row inmate sleeps fitfully
I'm watching you
Right behind you, but you don't know I'm there
I'm watching you
Always watching
In the night
I want nothing more
than to
turn my thoughts
into words
To speak the desires
that whisper in my mind
I want you to be
aware
that my heartbeat
quickens
when you're near
And why did I not
say all this
earlier?
Because it can't come out
no matter how hard I try
Coeur d’Alene my dear
The stops are few and far between
And we’ve come so many miles
On this mission so it seems
We dream of life unhindered
By time zones and state lines
Driving three states over
But we’re never sure what we’ll find
Rewinding relationships
And hoping that our statements stick
So let’s steal **** from Wal-mart
And I’ll drink until it makes me sick

So we’re on  a journey to the ends of the earth
But the spark that lights the way
Is being choked by the dirt
The lines, roads, sands and streams
Run together on the page
To form the surface of a face
I’ve not seen in too many days

The earth will move beneath your feet
The sun and moon above your head
And all that passes keep in mind
You’re loved until we’re all but dead
95 winds as the lines begin to blur
Fueled by fumes and rumors
Knowing only what we’ve heard

But I assure you this is not the end of the road
This is only the beginning as far as I know
And as far as we’ll go
Isn’t measured in kilometers
We wouldn’t be out here
If you weren’t something to bother with
We’re following
Like a ******* dog chasing a car
If you fall we’re right behind you
Just remember who we are this time
Copyright Henk vonStockhausen & Ryan Schwalm
They're just words
characters on a dusty old page
knives spat into someone's back
waves washing over their heads
In one ear
Out the other
Unless of course they fell
like rain
on deaf ones
Ringing
Stinging
Their they're there
Whispers, screams, and all in between
Causing pain or revelation
Thousands of languages, some of them dead
Hollow, rich
Biting sarcasm to a lover's caress
They're just words...
 Dec 2010 Ryan Bowdish
Emma
I would do it if I knew how.
I would rip this beast off my back and expose my heart, beating and bigger than my whole body
I would put rocks in my shoes so that the storm can't move me anymore
I would close my eyes and let my flesh be beaten by rain pellets, and shake as if the lightning were my soul,
And the thunder would echo with my cries in the space that stays between us
And I would stand in the storm with my heart exposed and pierce you with my eyes once I remembered how to open them


And I would remember I was strong enough to move.
There's nothing inside
yet
you can see
the truth
of what you meant
to me
on my hands
 Dec 2010 Ryan Bowdish
Emma
You say rock I say row
You connect and I glow
When sky alights night showers
ringing from bell towers
You smile kaleidoscopes on
my soft glimmering hopes
and I flutter on water
drops from high mountain tops
rustle down with the leaves
to your echoing pleas.

You say please take my hand
I say don't try again

But it's heavy on earth in the rain
And you know I'll give in once again
when the sky darkens up and I see
that a spotlight's on me
and the strangeness it brings
and the lightness of wings

And it's hard not to laugh
when the air smiles in star shine
and bells chime like sky rhymes
even sitting on top of a
mountain of clocks
and giggling tripping
and falling down rocks

And it's hard not to laugh
at your persistence
despite my resistance
because we rock and row
and connect and glow
as sky alights night showers
ringing from bell towers

and I would have been sinking in sand
had I not grabbed your hand.
 Dec 2010 Ryan Bowdish
Emma
The rock lies forgotten under a
crescent moon, nestled in the
riverbed where dreams and
smiles flow and splash
against the bank

Glanced by toes
and dogs' noses
transitory contact

It has no name
but in its face is a wisdom
one can only find where
time changes nothing.
 Dec 2010 Ryan Bowdish
Pen Lux
Everyone knows you can make eye contact with glass as long as the lines are dark enough.
Lines. Not cracks.
You know the kind of lines that you only stare at because they're actually the scars on the side of a ******* addicts ***.
She talks about how thin she is
and looks down at her naked body
right where my eyes had been lingering throughout our conversation.
the fast paced dribble
seemed to only drain her more
and I couldn't help but listen.

We had the same color hair

She's the only one that caught my eye that night,
she was entertaining
and beautiful
and rotting
in the two feet of distance that kept us from touching.

You could tell by the way she opened the refrigerator door
that she doesn't like to eat,
and the shaking in her hands made you want to ask if she was okay.

Love:

the way the wind opens loose doors
a response whispered from eye to eye
my bleeding finger tips in your mouth
water: earth: fire: air: soaked in poison,
and completely fine.

I shouldn't have to think this hard to say how I feel,
but now that I know that you listen to what I say
I hide and stare at ceilings to avoid confrontation
because even though your back feels good,
I'd like to keep my pockets safe.

you're moonlight at 3am
and clouds inside on a rainy day.
you're a staircase in space
leading nowhere.

I'd rather be a stack of spoons than a pile of forks and knives.
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