I should....
no, can't
can't can't
won't.
refuse actually. do I like hurting? is there a reason I don't just
move on
normally when goodbye is said, twice, it means you leave
as in put one foot out into space and
pull
down
see what happens, see what passes. well, I really wasn't ever normal
knew that from the start
but this?
I'm on an edge. this thinned pathetic rim
that looks to me a bit
u
n
sta b l e
clearly
[not clearly]
there is a problem
or something broken
I'm dealing with it, but let's be honest
sometimes it feels like I'm
meshing with it
blendingintothisbigmess
that's so hard [for me only] to separate
forgot about that- have to be more specific
[for me only] is this still more than a bad taste in my mouth
[for me only] it stripped me of common sense
[for me only] I can't sleep at night
All I want to do is
be free
free to either walk through a day and not think your name
name name
name name name
or free to fall into your arms at the end of the day
every day
whatever
I know I talk to a wall
wall
and I'm here wall and you're there
wall
wall
and I swear I'm putting all I have into
[insert "letting go" here]
but instead-
trying to understand why I can't
leave you behind