She said she's engaged
She says she hates me
Knowing she's only one text away
Keeps my floating on clouds
Cotton fluffs she'll be the only one
To ever place me on
Even if she's married
Two kids and a house her own
She's the only other person
I'd die twice for
I'm like a kid in a candy shop
Knowing I could hear her voice again
Tape recordings in my head
Can finally become digital
Upgrading to a new hard drive
Even if it's only friends
I couldn't love her more now
Then I did 5 years ago
She's my ******
The only drug I'll ever be addicted to
The thump behind my heart
I couldn't tell you enough
Exactly what she means to me
I don't think this smile
Will ever leave my face again
Tag... we're both it
Now we can roll down emerald hills
Laughing and crying
Missing each other
A thing of the past
I'm here to stay
I'll be it forever
As long as she's the one I'm chasing
Cloud 9 surpassed
I'm floating on heavens chimney smoke
Even if she doesn't feel the same
I'm just glad I can say hi again

Crushing blows
Heavy lefts
2x4s to the face
Slandering my existence
Any response only fuel
To a raging inferno
I'm the insect caught
Between walls of red
Boiling my insides
Exoskeleton dissolving
Weighed down by the lack of oxygen
If you really felt that way
Why did you stay
I had no bearing on your life
My existence was only for the labor
My opinions a kiss on the wind
You simply ignored
My affection rejected
Was it wrong of me to hope for a better outcome
Thinking you'd see the potential
Our love was a joke
Comedy you entertained
Thank you for giving me sight
Realizing the toxicity of us
You'll always be a child
Tied to the apron strings
Never leaving room for anybody else
Now I feel the weight
Not from you no longer being mine
But from the lies you keep feeding
Blowing smoke into lungs already choking
You don't see it yet
Probably never will
But if you do
I'll pray you can forgive yourself
I never will
Weighed down by the longing
My daughter's smile missing
Her laughter the only faith
I had left in humanity
You robbed from me
I'll leave you well enough alone
Karma's a *****
Hope your ready for her wrath

I see it
Tiny fractals glistening
Microscopic yet radiant
Pillars of hope
Centimeters deep
Endless supply of warm
If only the sun never fell
I'd never have a worry in the world
But thanks to the moon
A kiss in the dark
Keeps me moving forward

Honestly it's never gotten me far
Its led me into dark allies
Black eyes and broken hearted
Honesty forgotten
Dead to this modern society
Baited traps set
People abusing you
Using lies to fill in the blank spaces
Falsified statements
Burying honest emotions
Funerals held for the living
Dead only mourned as a pawn
Honesty
Honestly the John Wilkes Booth
To my honest Abe

I used to read your poems
but lately you don't write
you're silent and aloof
you know that isn't right.
You can't close a door once opened
you can't abolish all your dreams
you're a poet of the heart
mustn't fall apart at the seams.
Say what you can in words
they speak the message true
spoken from the heart
the poems will see you through.
A hermit's not your style
a recluse, you are not
never give up writing
of things that you've been taught.
I used to read your poems
I'd read them once again
if you would send them out
(this one's from a poet friend)

Restricted access
Refrained visits
Just another inmate
Lost in thought
Future endeavors questionable
Cardinal directions backwards
What am I without her
Fear set
Concrete on my soul
Maybe my path will awaken
Who I need to be
What I should do
Every God a prayer sent
Every star wished on
Her happiness and health
The only thing I yearn for
I'm left as a number
No longer a citizen
Criminal in their eyes
I let the darkest part of me
Get the better half

Popcorn
Pizza rolls
Ice tea
Kleenex
***** about to get real
Party of one
15 seasons
Rewatching it unfold
Netflix no chill
Just sad and lonely
With my homie
Special Agent Gibbs